Sixty Days Without Orton

Last week WWE announced the suspension of Chris Jericho. This week they've announced the suspension of Randy Orton. While 'Y2J's' time off is linked to his behaviour at a house show 'The Viper' finds himself on the sidelines due to a violation of the company’s Wellness Policy.
 
This is Orton's third suspension during his WWE career but only the second that has been Wellness related. Previously he has served a thirty day suspension for smoking a banned substance backstage and a sixty day suspension due to incidents related to his anger management issues (which he has since overcome if you believe what he says in interviews). This now puts 'The Apex Predator' in the undesirable position of being one Wellness slip-up away from a future endeavour.
 
It also leaves WWE with a big gap to fill at the top of their next pay-per-view. Orton and Jericho had both been a part of the excellent four-way World Heavyweight title bout at Over The Limit and work had already begun on the plan to segue them into a one-on-one feud for No Way Out on June 17th. When it was announced Jericho was being suspended the silver lining was that somebody would get promoted for a supershow showdown with Orton. With both men suspended WWE finds itself lacking two established stars that could work with an upper mid-card talent and give them the rub.

Randy Orton is going to have lots of time for sitting down over the next two months

 
It's not all bad though. While an Orton v Jericho match would have been a nice addition to the PPV it hadn't had that much time dedicated to it, meaning the amount of effort that has been wasted is minimal. Furthermore WWE can always book the feud later in the year and there's now free time at No Way Out to give to some of the roster's fresh prospects. Coincidentally this is exactly what I discussed in my previous article (which you can read here).

WWE's team of writers have until Monday to concoct some entertaining and engrossing mid-card storylines to fill the next fortnight of television with. The Miz, Dolph Ziggler, Santino and Zack Ryder are all deserving of increased exposure and would benefit greatly from working in a feature pay-per-view bout. The tag team of Justin Gabriel and Tyson Kidd looked promising before 'There Werewolf of Cape Town' got injured, a match between them and Truth in Paradise (or whatever they're being called this week) would serve as an ideal pay-per-view opener. Meanwhile Antonio Cesaro, Damien Sandow and Ryback are all making steady progress establishing themselves in WWE and would receive a boost by having a match announced for a supershow.
 
Now is the perfect time to reward these men by giving them time to shine on a big show. The key is to give every match a little history so shows don't feel rushed and cobbled together.
 
Randy Orton made a foolish mistake. He's fortunate that he's in the position he's in: being one of WWE's few bankable stars he can afford to do things like this and suffer only light repercussions. If he were further down the roster he would risk having his push curtailed and perhaps even getting fired. As it is he will return to the same spot he's had for many years once he’s served his sixty days because WWE finds it so difficult to create stars of his level.
 
It's not fair and it's not right but that's the WWE system for you. Nothing will protect ‘The Viper’ in the future though. His next violation will be his last. Let's just hope he learns his lesson before both he and the company he works for pay the price.

#OtungaforUSchamp

On Wednesday something astonishing happened: David Otunga got “#OtungaforUSchamp” trending on Twitter.

I’ve been a fan of David Otunga for a while now. Not because he’s a great wrestler or because he’s someone who will clearly make it to the top of WWE because he’s not a great wrestler and is not ever going to rise above the mid-card in WWE. No, I’m a fan of David Otunga because he’s such a great character.

The ever-present coffee; the crisp, eloquent delivery of his lines; his use of the #Otungalaw hashtag on Twitter; the ridiculous poses he pulls before, during and after his matches; and, most importantly, his wonderful tendency to botch practically everything he does. These are the reasons I am a fan of David Otunga. Not everyone has to be a great wrestler.

Watch any match involving the former Nexus member and you are almost guaranteed to see him do something wrong. The best part is that it’s often something basic, such as on the April 16^th RAW from London where Otunga faced Santino and somehow managed to botch going for a pin. How can any wrestling fan not love the inadvertent hilarity of a wrestler who cannot master a pinning position?

This picture needs no words

Otunga is someone who’s found his niche on the card and performs it very well. He’s clearly an intelligent man (law degrees from Harvard don’t come easy) and has made the intelligent move of weaving his real life background into his wrestling gimmick. That’s always a smart direction to go in as it makes it easier to portray the character with conviction. It’s helped him gain a regular spot on RAW alongside his on- and 0ff-screen boss John Laurinaitis. See? Smart.

So, “#OtungaforUSchamp”? I’d agree with that. The belt has been worthless ever since Zack Ryder was senselessly booked to lose it to Jack Swagger on January 16^th. ‘Long Island Iced Z’ and Dolph Ziggler had done fine work making the belt mean something to fans in the latter months of 2011 and WWE has carelessly frittered that effort away. If it has to be on a comedy worker it should at least be on a comedy worker who will do something entertaining with the opportunity being a champion represents. That man is not Santino Marella.

That man is David Otunga.

SmackTalk 18.05.12

As WWE’s finally TV show of significance before Over The Limit SmackDown was inevitably going to be used to muster up a final bit of buzz for the RAW feud between Executive Vice President of Talent Relations John Laurinaitis and the company’s top star John Cena. Thankfully that was kept to a minimum. Laurinaitis kicked the show off by talking about the unfairness of having to compete in a fair bout, earning himself some pretty good heat in the process, and then wasn’t seen again for the rest of the show.

Sadly the rising stars didn’t get as much exposure as they’ve been enjoying recently on this week’s show. What with it being the final show before a pay-per-view that’s understandable. Antonio Cesaro and Ryback failed to appear, although Ryback did get highlighted with a video of him squashing jobbers. Darren Young and Titus O’Neil got to wrestle the tag champs, but neither former NXT regular will amount to anything of note so that’s not a bout worth dwelling on. It was Damien Sandow who once again stood out in the newcomer pack. He refused to wrestle but did get into the ring to brutalise his scheduled opponent Yoshi Tatsu after Tatsu mocked him. It was a spirited performance and a good indication that Sandow won’t disappoint when he starts wrestling, whenever that may be.

The episode did a good job of highlight Over The Limit’s two world title. Daniel Bryan downed Zack Ryder in a quick match, which may not have done ‘Long Island Iced Z’ any favours but did make Bryan look strong going into his much anticipated WWE championship match with CM Punk.

Bryan stuck around to provide guest commentary on the Kane v Punk match that followed, and did a great job of putting ‘The Straight Edge Superstar’ over as a great wrestler and worthy champion. By doing that Bryan helped build anticipation for his WWE match on Sunday because he deviated from the WWE norm of burying an opponent. By talking Punk up Bryan made it clear that they would have a competitive, enjoyable match and helped enhance Punk’s standing in the eyes of fans.

Meanwhile two of the four Over The Limit World Heavyweight title match participants clashed in the main event. Champion Sheamus pinned Randy Orton with a schoolboy rollup, a counter to ‘The Apex Predator’s’ RKO. It was an enjoyable, if subdued, match that should have done its job of creating interest in the pay-per-view title bout.

The best thing about Orton and Sheamus’s interaction was ‘The Viper’s’ post-match RKO. That got him back on course as the unpredictable character he should always be presented as when a babyface. It helped him recover from his clean loss too (clearly the intention).

So has this episode of SmackDown got me excited about Over The Limit? No more than I was already, I’m afraid. I do think Over The Limit will be a good show (and possibly it will be better than good) but nothing that I’ve seen on RAW or SmackDown has swayed me one way or the other. They certainly wouldn’t have convinced me to pay for the show if it wasn’t free on Sky Sports. One of the reasons wrestling companies have television shows is to give people reason to buy pay-per-views and attend live events. WWE need to remember that.

John Laurinaitis promo

Tweet 1: SmackDown begins with a recap of the Cena and Laurinaitis segment from RAW. WWE should be ashamed that's their top feud.

Tweet 2: John Laurinaitis promo to open the show. This is actually happening is it? Making things worse is that there's no David Otunga in sight.
Tweet 3: Big Johnny claims he's approaching 40. He's 46.
Tweet 4: Punk v Laurinaitis is hardly McMahon v Austin. That they just mentioned bosses makes me think WWE are striving to equal that famous feud.
Tweet 5: Laurinaitis is in the ring shouting "You!" over and over at fans. Perhaps he's trying to create his own "Yes!"
Tweet 6: Cole's getting VERY animated about the alleged unfair treatment of John Laurinaitis.

R-Truth and Kofi Kingston v Darren Young and Titus O’Neil

Tweet 7: That entrance confirmed that R-Truth is not as athletic as Kofi Kingston.

Tweet 8: How does Cole build up the challengers for the tag team titles? He describes them as very good.
Tweet 9: Swagger and Ziggler are better than very good.
Tweet 10: Kofi and Truth are facing Titus O'Neil and Darren Young. Young is once again sporting his giant knee pads.
Tweet 11: “Oh, he just hit that boy with the rocket” #Bookerisms
Tweet 12: R-Truth won with his finisher. Once again the commentators didn't name it. I'm pretty sure nobody knows what it's called anymore.

Damien Sandow v Yoshi Tatsu

Tweet 13: Damien Sandow doesn't see the appeal of Zack Ryder. He's not the only one. Ryder's popularity has plummeted over the last few months.

Tweet 14: Damien Sandow is holding the microphone as though it were a wine glass. Nice touch.
Tweet 15: Sandow doesn't want to face Yoshi Tatsu as he's unworthy. I don't blame him.
Tweet 16: Tatsu just spoke and then imitated a chicken. He sounds like he's mentally deficient.
Tweet 17: We finally get a look at Sandow's wrestling gear. Purple knee pads and pink trunks. That just makes him more entertaining in my view.

Damien Sandow is one of WWE's brightest prospects

Matt Striker interviews Sheamus and Randy Orton

Tweet 18: Sheamus and Orton arguing? But I thought all WWE babyfaces liked each other...

Tweet 19: Look at the love in Striker's eyes. He lives to interview Orton.
Tweet 20: I think WWE are preparing to turn either Orton or Sheamus. Orton would benefit from going heel more.

Zack Ryder v Daniel Bryan

Tweet 21: Ryder v Daniel Bryan! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

Tweet 22: That was pretty much a squash match and it lasted less than five minutes but it's STILL going to be the best match of the show.
Tweet 23: Bryan's Yes Lock is my favourite WWE finisher at the moment.

Kane v CM Punk

Tweet 24: And now we get Bryan on commentary for Punk v Kane. I wasn't looking forward to this match so that's a nice bonus.

Tweet 25: Bryan understands how (and why) to build up his opponent. That's rare in WWE.
Tweet 26: Those are some particularly limp kicks from Kane.
Tweet 27: That Bryan was allowed to mention the indies is a good sign for the Punk v Bryan match at Over The Limit.
Tweet 28: Comedic run from Bryan there.
Tweet 29: Kane showed a lot of focus after that chair shot. Perhaps he should consider getting hit with a chair before every match. He might win more.

A graphic for Randy Orton v Sheamus

Tweet 30: Is that the Eye of Sauron being used in Orton's graphic?

Santino v Cody Rhodes

Tweet 31: I'd normally be upset with Cody having to face someone like Santino. Not today. I'm just pleased he's not facing Big Show.

Tweet 32: Booker thinks the IC title is more prestigious than the US title. He's right.
Tweet 33: This is just an excuse for the commentators to read facts about championships off of Wikipedia.
Tweet 34: Rhodes jobs to Santino. I despair.

Recap of Big Show’s firing

Tweet 35: "For many it was one of the most stunning things they had ever witnessed" - Michael Cole on the storyline firing of Big Show

Tweet 36: That was followed by a picture of Big Show crying with "Why?" written underneath. My sentiments exactly.

Randy Orton v Sheamus

Tweet 37: FELLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!

Tweet 38: Randy Orton used to do a great dropkick. Every one I've seen him do for the last few months has been sloppy.
Tweet 39: "Randy Orton's been the franchise player on Friday Night SmackDown for a while now" - Michael Cole, polluting the world with his filthy lies
Tweet 40: Orton just smashed Shemus's arm into metal steps. Surely that's a disqualifcation isn't it?
Tweet 41: #tenpunchesintheropespot
Tweet 42: Sheamus's battering ram from the apron (that's what Cole called it) needs work. He's barely clearing the rope.
Tweet 43: Orton's already a nine time champion? WWE switches its world titles far too often.
Tweet 44: Sheamus hasn't told us he likes to foight this week. Poor.
Tweet 45: RKO countered into a schoolboy by Sheamus. Give it a year and that will be the standard counter. Shoving Orton away is played out.
Tweet 46: That show closing RKO to Sheamus was painfully predictable.

That RAW Recap 16.04.12

Over the years I’ve been to quite a few wrestling shows. I’ve been to events held by various British indies. I was there for ROH’s first (joint) show in the UK. I saw CM Punk and Colt Cabana’s first match outside of the United States. I’ve been to a SmackDown taping and a RAW house show. I was even at the London Arena in November 2000 when WCW filmed Nitro (that was an interesting experience). But it wasn’t until last night (alongside friend and former colleague Dan Pryce) that I was able to say I’d seen Monday Night RAW filmed live.

I’m happy to say that the RAW taping was the best WWE show I’ve ever been to. The crowd was lively from start to finish and we got to see every big name you could realistically hope for. There was no Brock Lesnar but he was never going to be there. I was happy with the names on offer.

The seats we had were close to the entrance, which was good, but slightly behind the Titantron, which was bad. We got a pretty good view of wrestlers as they entered but couldn’t see anything that happened on the big screen. Thankfully it was a vignette-light episode so the lack of ‘tron view wasn’t as catastrophic as it could have been.

We were close to the exit at the side of the stage, which meant we could occasionally catch glimpses inside the Gorilla Position and cheer (or boo) some of the wrestlers as they left. The very first wrestler I saw was thanks to those seats: Damien Sandow came to sneak a peek at the set and the crowd. That would be the only time we’d see him: he didn’t wrestle or appear in other capacity.

The opening match was announced as being for Superstars but as the commentary team were introduced directly after its conclusion I’m not convinced that was right. It saw Dean Ambrose defeat Alex Riley with a cheeky rollup. Most fans chanted “Who are ya?” at the developmental talent. As I recognised him and prefer him to the nondescript A-Ry I cheered him. Cheering heels would be a theme of the evening.

Match two was a lengthy-by-current-standards Divas contest. Kelly Kelly entered first to an almost Cena-like mixed reaction. Kids and their parents cheered her. Everyone else seemed keener on Eve Torres. I was firmly in the Eve camp. She got the surprise win. By WWE standards it was a good women’s match.

That was followed by Jack Swagger losing to R-Truth. Truth got a good reaction but couldn’t hold onto the crowd for the whole match: a few minutes in “Let’s go Swagger!” chants started up.

Lillian Garcia was out next to sing God Save The Queen. It’s nice that WWE goes to the trouble of having our national anthem sung but it’s not in the nature of the British to go wild for it. That’s more of an American thing. As such Lillian got booed for most of her performance, the crowd only relenting at the end to cheer and clap her. Hopefully she understood it wasn’t anything personal.

Mark Henry lolloped to the ring before RAW officially started. That saved valuable airtime: the guy does not walk quickly. The main show kicked off with the advertised WWE title match between Henry and champion CM Punk. ‘The Second City Saint’ got a great reaction and somehow managed to drag ‘The World’s Sweatiest Man’ to a bearable outing. That’s no small feat when you consider how cumbersome and limited Henry truly is.

I thought this was a great match. It was possibly the only contest of the night where I cheered the face and booed the heel. There were chants of “CM Punk”, “Sexual Chocolate” and many cries of “Yes!” Punk went over with the Macho Man Elbow, which drew loud cheers from the audience.

CM Punk prepares to drop the match winning Macho Elbow

Jericho then appeared on the Titantron for a lengthy exchange with the champ. We weren’t able to see him from where we were but we could hear him. That was (mostly) enough. ‘Y2J’ again taunted ‘The Voice of the Voiceless’ about being drunk and then introduced some footage. Punk handily referenced the footage so we knew it was a shot of him doing something at a pub. He reaffirmed he’s straight edge and then ‘The Highlight of the Night’ revealed the two will clash for the WWE championship in a Chicago Street Fight at Extreme Rules. That should be one of the better matches on the show.

RAW’s second match was for the United States title. Champion Santino Marella was introduced first. He stood at the top of the ramp peeling off various football shirts to get heat. As I’m not a football fan I wouldn’t have reacted even if I could have seen this display. I wouldn’t have recognised what shirt belonged to what team, and wouldn’t have cared if I had. Having watched the broadcast I now know that one of the kits belonged to Chelsea. Amusingly this prompted Jerry Lawler to say "Come on, Santino, you're in London! That won't work here!" ‘The King’ needs to work on his geography.

David Otunga came out to face him. He got a loud cheer from me. I’m a fan of Otunga, largely because he’s so ridiculous and prone to botching moves. He was on fine form last night, at one point even managing to go for a cover incorrectly. That, as Michael Cole would say, is vintage Otunga. Laurinaitis’s legal aid predictably lost. The match was nowhere near as enjoyable as simply seeing David Otunga.

Backstage Josh Mathews spoke to Lord Tensai and his young boy. A kid sat in front of me said to his friend “We’re going to see Lord Tensai. He’s funny.” That should tell you all you need to know about whether the former A-Train is over as a monster heel.

A Lesnar video aired. It lost a surprising amount of impact without being able to see the accompanying footage. The message was basically that ‘The Pain’ sees himself as an athlete and an ass-kicker, not a superstar. He didn’t come back because he missed the crowd or going through the curtain. He came back because he likes to beat people up and win. He also said had he stayed around Cena wouldn’t be where he is now. I’d disagree with that. Cena still would’ve gotten over and Lesnar would have remained at the top of the card but fizzled out a little. His initial success was as much thanks to willing opponents and the good booking of Paul Heyman and Vince McMahon as it was his own ability.

Kane came out to squash Ryder. Amusingly he stood in the ring for around three minutes as his attacks on Ryder and Randy Orton were recapped. He then slapped Ryder about at ringside and then gave him a choke slam in the ring. That was followed by a tedious promo that I’ve sat through twice but still couldn’t tell you the point of.

Woo woo woo! You got beat!

Backstage Kofi Kingston was talking to AJ in hushed tones. I like to think he was saying something vastly inappropriate. Daniel Bryan showed up. I couldn’t see any of this but I knew immediately that Bryan was on the screen because the audience erupted with chants of “Yes!” Bryan told Kofi that just because he didn’t want AJ that didn’t make it open season, then told AJ that he would make ‘The Dreadlocked Dynamo’ tap out to the LeBell Lock. He stopped himself there and said that he didn’t like the move having that name as he was far greater than Jean LeBell. He said the move would be known as the Yes Lock, then shouted “Yes!” over and over again directly into Kofi’s face. It was hilarious.

That was followed by a John Cena promo. The face of the company received his traditional mixed reaction, though there were more boos than cheers. Cena is not a popular man in London. He talked about how he thinks John Laurinaitis wants to replace him with Brock Lesnar. Storyline-wise that’s probably the case: ‘Mr Excitement’ is a heel and so naturally wants to dispatch all top babyfaces. That’s how WWE works. The truth is that Cena is not going anywhere. He’s far too valuable to WWE and everybody knows it.

John Laurinatis strolled out onto the stage to refute Cena’s conspiracy theory claims and book him in a match. We were told it would be an Extreme Rules match but wouldn’t reveal the name of Cena’s opponent. Why? Apparently it’s something to do with People Power. Whatever. I was just excited to see John Laurinaitis and hear his raspy voice. Unfortunately his mic work left a little to be desired live and it was difficult to hear what he was saying. Thankfully Cena recapped it during the break. He earned some humour points there.

Next was the best match of the evening: Kofi Kingston v Daniel Bryan. There was no way we were going to boo Bryan during this. The “Yes!” meme is just too over and Bryan is too well respected. Kofi started off getting a good reaction but eventually ended up hearing boos… as well as shouts of “No!” when he started getting offence. Pretty much strike the former World champion got in elicited cries of “Yes!” Following his win via the Yes Lock Bryan reapplied the hold (which finally got him some boos) until Sheamus ran out to make the save.

Daniel Bryan! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

I think WWE are going to have to seriously consider turning Bryan face again. He’s very good in the heel role but he’s just so popular that it’s going to be hard for him to stay over as a bad guy. Once his run with Sheamus is over I hope he becomes a good guy again. A feud between he and a heel Christian would be great to see.

‘The Funkasurus’ continued his run of unmitigated popularity, getting a big pop from the London crowd. He was one of the highlights of the night for me, up there with Daniel Bryan, CM Punk and David Otunga. As much as I enjoyed seeing Brodus Clay I was even more excited to see Dolph Ziggler, his opponent for the evening.

It would be generous to refer to what happened between Ziggler and Clay as a match. ‘The Show Off’ took a suplex before Swagger got into the ring and took a headbutt. Ziggler then took one of his trademark ridiculous bumps to a loud pop and Vickie got into the ring to be shoved to the floor by Naomi. Brodus and his girls then posed and danced as the heels slinked off to the back.

Backstage John Laurinaitis gave David Otunga a pep talk about focusing on his career. Eve showed up and the three went into what was presumably Laurinaitis’s office. No comment.

A video for Chief Jay Strongbow was followed by more backstage shenanigans with R-Truth and Teddy Long. These videos had been played throughout the night. Having seen them I can honestly say they wouldn’t have added to my enjoyment of the show at all.

The penultimate match of the night saw Big Show team up with The Great Khali to take on Epico and Primo. Why the tag champions were chosen for job duty is a mystery. Show has been feuding with Cody Rhodes and Khali been involved in a SmackDown pseudo-rivalry with Drew McIntyre. Why those more prominent heels didn’t get to face Khali and Show I can’t say. Still, at least we got to see Rosa Mendes. That’s never a bad thing.

The heels tried to escape but were caught by Big Show. They then took a choke slam and a Punjabi Plunge back in the ring. Show and Khali then did some embarrassing dancing. Something I didn’t realise was that Abraham Washington was stood at the entrance during the match. I like the way WWE are using him so far and I hope he gets to become a prominent manager. Next time I’ll buy better seats so I can see random FCW call-ups when they stroll out to watch matches.

After the final break of the evening John Cena came back out for his Extreme Rules match. He got a few more cheers on his second appearance. Perhaps because people knew he wouldn’t be talking. I still booed him.

His mystery opponent was introduced by John Laurinaitis and David Otunga (who sat at ringside during the bout). It was Lord Tensai. On commentary Lawler referenced the man’s previous time with WWE and subsequent success in Japan. I was disappointed that there was no back hair to chant about but the loud chants of “Albert!” made up for it.

The crowd was indifferent to Tensai's pre-match disrobing ceremony

Before that match I’d be fairly disinterested in the former A-Train. It seemed as though he was yet another guy being introduced to television with the winning streak gimmick. You can only see that so many times before it becomes boring. That he got to face Cena on his third week of TV is a positive sign for Tensai. The match was a slow starter but when it got going it was pretty enjoyable. The two men brawled around ringside, with Tensai taking a shot from the steel steps particularly well, before heading back into the ring. Otunga involved himself, tossing SuperCena back into the ring to take Tensai’s double underhook facebuster for a two count.

They battled back and forth for a few more minutes before Otunga interjected himself again. He took an AA, which allowed Tensai to catch Cena by surprise with a green mist and double-handed choke bomb for the win. I’d taken it for granted that Cena would be victorious so I was pleased that Tensai went over. Technically it was a clean win too, as the Extreme Rules meant that the mist was not illegal.

After the match Tensai posed in the ring and Cena oversold in a corner. Once the cameras stopped rolling the various heels sauntered to the back while medical staff assisted Cena up the aisle. That Cena sold the mist so much was ridiculous. It may get it over as a dangerous “move” but it only highlights the fact that Cena never sells for younger stars, only for established guys (and Tensai’s former time with the company puts him firmly into the latter camp).

The dark match main event saw Chris Jericho (who didn’t appear in the ring during RAW) take on CM Punk. The champion attacked the challenger before the bell and they had a brief exchange in the ring before Daniel Bryan dashed out to cause the disqualification finish. That brought out Sheamus to even the odds. He was followed by Cody Rhodes, who was followed by Big Show. They were then joined by Alberto Del Rio and Randy Orton. Orton and Sheamus hit their finishers then went round ringside high-fiving fans to send us home happy.

Chris Jericho enters for his dark match main event. He was not the highlight of the night...

Not only was this a good episode of RAW it was a great experience live. It narrowly pips the SmackDown taping I went to last year as the most enjoyable WWE event I’ve attended (and the SmackDown event was only in the running as I got to see a Five Second Pose from Edge and Christian). I’d recommend going to see RAW whenever it’s in the area. The list of names on offer makes it well worth it.

That RAW Recap 09.04.12

If you missed this week's RAW you didn't miss a lot. Following last week's packed edition it was very much a return to business as usual this week. The same selection of men we see every week clashed in a series of short, forgettable matches.
 
That's not to say nothing noteworthy happened, just that the matches on offer were uniformly pedestrian. Any show with a main event of John Cena v David Otunga cannot be considered particularly good, no matter what your criteria. About the most exciting thing to occur match-wise was Brodus Clay leaving the comfort of singles squash matches for a considerably lengthier tag battle alongside Santino Marella. They beat the team of Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger in the best contest of the show.
 
Where the show did well was in progressing the promotion's top feuds. John Laurinaitis kicked things off by showing a video Brock Lesnar's return last week. After announcing that Cena and Lesnar will face one another at Extreme Rules the General Manager introduced 'The Pain', who sauntered out to loud cheers. The former UFC champion had just enough time to announce that he had returned to WWE to restore some legitimacy to the company before John Cena interrupted him.

Lesnar and Cena will battle at Extreme Rules (without David Otunga in the ring)

In the ring 'The CeNation Leader' slapped Lesnar and a tussle between the two broke out. Referees and agents did their best to keep the two men apart but couldn't handle it do the locker room was called into action to assist.
 
As pull-apart brawls in wrestling go this was pretty good. Lesnar's history and reputation as a "real" athlete definitely helped there. Cena's bloodied lip helped too.
 
Sadly the good work done in the opening segment didn't spill over to WWE's other major feud. The sight of 'Y2J' pouring alcohol over the tee-total Punk was tedious last week. It was even more tedious when shown for a second time this week, as was the sight of Jericho smashing a (stunt prop) whiskey bottle over the champ's head.
 
The Punk and Jericho feud should have stayed firmly about who was the better wrestler of the two. They are both fine technical wrestlers and it would have made sense for the men to develop their rivalry exclusively around that point. WWE should have at least waited until they had a couple of pay-per-view outings under their collective belt before introducing personal aspects to retain interest in the feud. Programmes that revolve around alcoholism and drug abuse are not the escapist (and family) entertainment WWE presents itself as. It's also incredibly poor taste and a cheap way of getting heel heat. 'The Highlight of the Night' isn't as good as he thinks he is if he's taking this route to be booed.
 
Taken for what it was the Punk and Jericho segment did what was required of it. Their feud was moved along and they're now a step closer to their inevitable clash at Extreme Rules.
 
With next week's RAW being filmed at the O2 Arena in London I wouldn't get your hopes up for anything more than an average episode. WWE rarely push the boat out for their sojourns to Britain these days. Surprisingly Chris Jericho is confirmed for the show. Unsurprisingly Brock Lesnar is not. I highly doubt he'll appear. It seems unlikely that WWE would fly Lesnar to the UK just for a RAW appearance: such a move would risk annoying arguably their biggest star for next to no reward.
 
On the plus side I have tickets to next Monday's RAW so expect some sort of coverage on here and my Twitter account. I'm not sure how I'll go about it yet but there will be something. I'm expecting some Extreme Rules matches to be announced. I'll be indifferent to that. What I really want is the chance to boo John Cena. If I get that I'll be happy.

Match results:

Brodus Clay and Santino Marella defeated Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger

R-Truth defeated Cody Rhodes (following a distraction by Big Show)
Lord Tensai defeated Yoshi Tatsu
Mark Henry defeated CM Punk via disqualification
Alberto Del Rio defeated Zack Ryder
John Cena defeated David Otunga

Going Fourth

If WWE wanted to try a different approach to pushing talent to the top once WrestleMania XXVIII is in the history books they could do a lot worse than resurrecting the Four Horsemen name. The group is being inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame on March 31^st and will be fresh in the minds of WWE fans, which would make the April 2^nd RAW a great time to introduce a modern version of the faction.

Imagine what a cliffhanger ending to the traditionally packed post-‘Mania RAW it could be!

I imagine that episode of RAW is going to finish with The Rock and John Cena together in the ring, either with ‘The Great One’ putting Cena over or the two agreeing to a rematch at SummerSlam (or perhaps even WrestleMania XXIX, who knows). Whatever the case those are the two I expect to be in the ring at the end of that week’s RAW and they are undoubtedly the two men involved in the biggest match at this year’s WrestleMania. If four young guys were to enter the ring through the crowd and attack the two megastars they would earn themselves a ton of heat.

If WWE went with that angle they would be setting up numerous singles and tag matches. Cena has not feuded with a proper faction since he faced JBL’s Cabinet in 2004, and that wasn’t the most threatening group ever to grace a wrestling ring. Battling four young, hungry guys on the rise would be something new for the company’s top guy and give a fresh spin to matches we would have undoubtedly seen before (because Cena has faced everybody).

Two of the Horsemen could face Rock and Cena at SummerSlam. Zack Ryder could be brought in as Cena’s TV back-up between now and then (after a brief segment showing that the two have made piece following their tedious fallout last month), which would allow for a babyface to be elevated along with the four heels.

An even more impactful debut would be to have the four guys attack Cena and Rock after their main event match at WrestleMania has concluded. Having four young guys beating down a legend and the promotion’s top star on the biggest show of the year would be massive shock, draw intense heat, and put the signify that the group means business.

Even if WWE didn’t want to use the group against Cena and The Rock it would still be something different for modern programming. There’s not been a proper faction in WWE since Legacy. They disbanded in early 2010, but in truth they were never really made into the dominant faction they could have been. The last time a gang truly ruled the roost in WWE was in 2005 when Evolution were a force to be reckoned with. That was seven years ago, more than long enough to warrant another stab at the time-tested formula.

Without Cena and Rock to feud with the best way to use such a group would be to have them focused on obtaining the company’s top titles. That seemed to be what the original Horsemen were always about: Flair having the world title with the three other men working to get the tag belts and a mid-card strap between them. It not only makes the championships seem more important (because wrestlers are making it clear they want to win them) but also makes the wrestlers themselves look good when they accomplish their goal.

Further down the line this makes a babyface dethroning a member of the group for a title mean more because they’ve overcome the odds and defeated a heavily pushed star who cares about being a champion and has (hopefully) been booked strongly while on top. If the Horsemen are booked right fans should be desperate to see them lose their titles.

There are four ideal candidates for a revived Four Horsemen group: Daniel Bryan, Cody Rhodes, Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger. Bryan would make a fantastic centrepiece to the group and his alliance with three other guys would add some spice and variety to his feud with Sheamus (which I assume will continue until Extreme Rules in late April, possibly longer). Bryan is exactly the sort of wrestler that would have gone into the group years ago, and as the most prominent (and recent) world champion of the foursome he’s a natural fit for the leader spot.

In twenty years wouldn't it be nice to see a similar picture featuring Swagger, Ziggler, Rhodes and Bryan?

Cody Rhodes could begin obtaining shady victories via help from Swagger and Ziggler, ideally against genuinely popular mid-carders like Santino and Zack Ryder (yeah, him again). This approach could also be useful for elevating mid-card wrestlers. Take Justin Gabriel as an example: he could beat Rhodes in a non-title match and earn himself a shot at the gold. If ‘The Dashing One’ had to cheat to obtain a victory over Gabriel it would show that he’s not capable of beating him, thus showing that Gabriel is someone fans can get behind and root for. He could cut very simple promos saying that he’s proven he can beat Rhodes and just needs a match where Rhodes doesn’t rely on outside interference.

That approach could work with anybody, and would elevate two guys (Rhodes and whoever was chosen as his opponent) effectively. That’s exactly what WWE needs to do.

This would leave Ziggler and Swagger to work as a tag team. This is a comedown for Ziggler who has made great strides as a singles performer in the last year, but it wouldn’t need to be a long term thing. Swagger and Ziggler have built up a solid on-screen chemistry and would make a great lead tag team for a revived doubles division. This would be the toughest part of the Four Horsemen idea: making the tag titles mean something so that all members of the group have meaningful belts. I think “All American Perfection” (as the duo have been dubbed online) would be capable of making any two men on the roster look competitive. It would simply be a case of WWE pairing up guys and creating some decent tag ranks.

A Four Horsemen revival would work over a long or short period of time. The aim could either be to have four guys work as a unit for several years or to make it a shorter term deal with the goal being a feud between the lead guy and one of the other three over the world championship. That would be a different way of starting a feud and should lead to the creation of a genuinely popular babyface star when the Horseman v Horseman feud started.

If WWE got behind this idea they could elevate a lot of wrestlers. The Horsemen themselves would obviously become bigger stars and there would be lots of opportunities to elevate mid-card wrestlers and tag acts too. I mentioned Zack Ryder, Santino and Justin Gabriel above but anyone capable of forming a babyface connection with the fans would work in such a spot.

If anyone from WWE happens to be reading this, maybe give it a try. You could be surprised by the results.

SmackTalk 09.03.12

WrestleMania Season appears to be having a negative effect on SmackDown. What is normally the most consistent show in wrestling has recently been going through a patch of subpar episodes, less enjoyable than usual thanks to unhealthy amounts of time spent recapping its Monday night counterpart.

I understand that at this time of year WWE feels that recapping RAW is a better use of time than the From The Vault segment. I’d agree. But this week’s SmackDown saw two recaps of RAW, eating up around twenty minutes of airtime together. They could have featured two matches and a backstage segment in the same amount of time, which could have been used for an underutilised talent such as Jinder Mahal, Hunico, Heath Slater or some of the NXT crew.

Between late January and early April WWE should be presenting the best product possible, to prepare for WrestleMania and encourage casual viewers who only watch occasionally to watch more often. If such viewers see the same footage shown twice a week they’re unlikely to tune in more often. WWE should take Jim Ross’s advice and maximise their minutes.

There was some enjoyable stuff mixed in with the incessant recapping. Kofi Kingston and R-Truth had a brief but enjoyable non-title win over tag team champions Epico and Primo. Those four men all deserve some sort of multi-man outing at WrestleMania. Sadly that seems unlikely, unless they get mixed up in the Team Long v Team Laurinaitis match.

Speaking of which, that storyline wasn’t as heavily featured as it could have been this week (especially when you consider there was a show-long storyline in which Laurinaitis was running SmackDown). It’s not a program I’m interested in watching beyond April but it’s enjoyable enough and should get some mid-card guys onto the big show. That’s reason enough to put up with it in my book.

New US champion Santino Marella is a safe bet to be a part of that team match-up as he’s been a supporting character in the story for a while now. His United States title defence against Jack Swagger got this week’s SmackDown off to a great start. It would have made a fine main event and both wrestlers deserve praise for their performances. That said ‘The All American American’ is better than playing the job guy for a popular comedy performer.

My final thought has to be about Sheamus and Daniel Bryan. They’re WrestleMania opponents. Bryan is the World Heavyweight champion and Sheamus is the Royal Rumble winner. But it doesn’t feel like a feud of that magnitude. Both men are doing well in their roles: Sheamus is likeable and wrestles well as a babyface while Bryan is brilliant as an obnoxious, bullying heel. His cries of “Yes!” are one of the nicest touches to any act currently working in wrestling.

It’s the booking that’s the problem. Everything to do with the feud feels staid. The two should either be engaging in spirited pull-apart brawls or Bryan should be ducking his challenger, making it clear that he’s afraid of ‘Great White’. Having both guys being interviewed in the ring is a nice starting point but one that should have been employed several weeks ago.

I’ve been saying this for weeks. I’m fully aware the feud is not going to change now.

Show opening

Tweet 1: Let's tweet some Smack.

Tweet 2: Hype video. #MrExcitement
Tweet 3: Laurinaitis should ensconce himself in a cage at the start of a show more often. Great gimmick.

Santino Marella v Jack Swagger

Tweet 4: Just two months ago Zack Ryder beat Dolph Ziggler for the US championship. The title meant something then. It's worthless now.

Tweet 5: I like Laurinaitis as a TV character but I'm still worried that he's the most pushed man on SmackDown so far this week.
Tweet 6: When did Santino get all of those tattoos? When?!
Tweet 7: Ziggler told to leave ringside. The talent level just went down.
Tweet 8: Jack Swagger is wasted again. Why is he being used to elevate Santino?

Assorted backstage nonsense

Tweet 9: Sheamus and Daniel Bryan face to face this evening? Took them long enough... read this
Tweet 10: That water feature hall they just showed looked like the Bat Cave.
Tweet 11: Kane v Aksana. That match is money.
Tweet 12: Teddy Long v John Laurinaitis! On free TV! They're mad! That match is guaranteed pay-per-view money.

Triple H and Shawn Michaels’ promo from RAW

Tweet 13: Undertaker v Triple H is being billed as "The End of an Era." Because Hell in a Cell and The Streak aren't enough of a draw, apparently.
Tweet 14: How much of SmackDown's air time is going to go to a RAW recap this week? C'mon... Give us a Funkasaurus match instead.
Tweet 15: Triple H and Shawn Michaels are still talking. This is repeat footage. Poor use of television time.
Tweet 16: It's nothing to do with Shawn Michaels being better than Triple H or Triple H being better than Shawn Michaels.
Tweet 17: That's good. Because Michaels is clearly the better of the two. There's no contest.
Tweet 18: If Triple H is in charge of WWE shouldn't he have known Michaels had been made the special referee?
Tweet 19: Also, what's special about Michaels as a referee? Call him a guest referee. Officials aren't special no matter who they are.
Tweet 20: SmackDown got a strong start with that cage match but the momentum has since been killed by a backstage skit and an overly thorough recap.

Shawn Michaels and Triple H cannot be contained on RAW alone

Drew McIntyre’s triumphant return to SmackDown

Tweet 21: The Drew McIntyre saga continues. It's a modern day epic.

Tweet 22: McIntyre can get his job back by winning. He's on track to get rehired. This storyline is predictable and boring.
Tweet 23: Speaking of predictable and boring here's The Great Khali!
Tweet 24: KHALI CAN’T EVEN WALK CONVINCINGLY!!
Tweet 25: Hornswoggle gets a TV match. There are dozens of guys under contract who deserve the spot over him.
Tweet 26: This match could be saved if McIntyre shot on Hornswoggle. I appreciate that's unlikely...
Tweet 27: Khali just chopped Drew in the head. I assume he did that so he can eat Hornswoggle without interruption.

Aksana and Teddy Long backstage

Tweet 28: Aksana's going to end up turning heel on Teddy. In other news Teddy thinks he can show he's a good GM by competing in a match.

Ezekiel Jackson v Mark Henry

Tweet 29: Oh good. Ezekiel Jackson.

Tweet 30: And he's facing Mark Henry. This gets better and better.
Tweet 31: Henry scoop slammed Big 'Zeke! He's a spot stealer, that's what he is!
Tweet 32: "Look here, 'Zeke, I got somethin' for ya!" #Bookerisms

Teddy Long v John Laurinaitis

Tweet 33: I will mark out if Laurinaitis connects with an Ace Crusher.
Tweet 34: Don't do Kane v Aksana now! Save it for WrestleMania!
Tweet 35: Orton RKOs Kane. Kane takes it poorly.
Tweet 36: Laurinaitis shouted at Orton after his interference. Not because Orton attacked Kane but because he stole the Ace Crusher.

Kofi Kingston and R-Truth v Epico and Primo

Tweet 37: Kofi Kingston. Why not?
Tweet 38: Epico, Primo and Rosa Mendes. They should be reunited with Hunico: read this
Tweet 39: Booker is now calling everything beautiful.
Tweet 40: Rosa Mendes knows how to jiggle. That's what they teach in FCW.
Tweet 41: Primo and Epico v Kofi Kingston and R-Truth v Jack Swagger and Dolph Ziggler could be a good WrestleMania addition.

Michael Cole interviews Sheamus and Daniel Bryan

Tweet 42: They're showing RAW footage again?! This seems pointless.
Tweet 43: They kept the recap short. They need to keep airtime free for Michael Cole...
Tweet 44: When I started watching wrestling there was no WrestleMania sign hung in arenas for wrestlers to stare at during promos.
Tweet 45: It was a happier time.
Tweet 46: Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!
Tweet 47: I'm not sure whether the AJ character is meant to be a heel or a face.
Tweet 48: Sheamus has firmly engaged Humble Babyface Mode.
Tweet 49: “AJ, shut up” – Daniel Bryan
Tweet 50: That promo segment was basic but it got the job done. They should've done it weeks ago and Sheamus should be getting pushed harder now.

Daniel Bryan, Miz and Cody Rhodes v Big Show, Randy Orton and Daniel Bryan

Tweet 51: Miz’s new T-shirt? Awesome.
Tweet 52: Cole claims Orton and Rhodes started together. No. Just no.
Tweet 53: Right now I'm expecting Sheamus to beat Bryan for the World title at WrestleMania.
Tweet 54: Knee from the apron! Yes! Yes! Yes!
Tweet 55: Miz's running boot to a sitting Sheamus looked really nice.
Tweet 56: Bryan shouting "Yes!" as he kicked at Sheamus: hilarious.
Tweet 57: "GI Bro was a one hit wonder" - Michael Cole
Tweet 58: Sheamus was booked as the isolated face. Orton should have been stuck in the ring and made a hot tag to Sheamus.
Tweet 59: Designated jobber Miz falls to an RKO. He's inherited Drew McIntyre's losing streak gimmick.
Tweet 60: I am uninterested in the Kane and Orton brawl.
Tweet 61: SmackDown went off the air as Kane lamped Orton in the face and 'The Viper' fell over. I LOL'd.

NXT Level

WWE really need to try harder with NXT. The show should be a place for new talent to earn a spot on RAW or SmackDown by engaging with fans and getting themselves over so that management have no choice but to use them more. Instead it’s a regimented affair where everyone is scripted to sound like everyone else, no unique personalities are present and the wrestlers are treated like idiots by the commentators, host Matt Striker, and each other. How is anyone supposed to stand out in such an environment? It says a lot about how WWE currently sees the show when two of the original pros have been fired since it began and one of the original hosts has left the company without being replaced.

With a little work it could be so much more than this.

Part of the problem is that the program currently bears no resemblance to its original format. WWE either need to officially reformat it or make an attempt to go back to what they originally intended by reinstating the pro-rookie dynamic and having stars from RAW and SmackDown that people actually care about appear as regulars. Having the likes of Chris Jericho and CM Punk on every episode helped the first season, why not repeat the process now?

The simplest and most effective way of making NXT a worthwhile affair would be to (finally) draw the current fifth season to a close and begin a new season. Everyone currently working on the show has been there long enough to earn a shot at getting over on RAW or SmackDown. Promote them all to the central shows and give them three months to prove they deserve to be there. If they don’t manage it then it’ll be time to release them: they will have had more than enough opportunities.

There are more than enough talented guys in FCW to make a sixth season of NXT very watchable. The obvious inclusions would be Kassius Ohno, Antonio Cesaro, Seth Rollins and Dean Ambrose, formerly Chris Hero, Claudio Castagnoli, Tyler Black and Jon Moxley respectively. The first three have been big stars in Ring of Honor while Ambrose was a standout in companies like CHIKARA, DGUSA and EVOLVE. They would all put on some truly excellent matches and provide some very enjoyable promos. A show built primarily around these four would be the best thing WWE could do with NXT.

After a year and a half in development the former Tyler Black (now Seth Rollins) deserves a shot at the big time

Then there’s Richie Steamboat. He’s a guy that has never been with a national promotion but deserves the chance to connect with fans. Meanwhile guys like Mike Dalton and Big E Langston have the look to warrant a shot at making an impact in a low pressure environment like NXT. If they don’t connect they can always be dropped back to FCW upon elimination to work on their shortcomings. The aim with guys like that should be to give them some exposure and let them attempt to get themselves over. They shouldn’t be rammed down the audience’s throat.

Guys like Abraham Washington, Eli Cottonwood and Husky Harris (a personal favourite of mine) could be considered for spots on a sixth season too. All are guys who weren’t given a fair chance at success in their previous runs on TV.

With the properly chosen cast and an emphasis on characters and good wrestling a sixth season of NXT could create some new stars. The show currently gets fairly poor viewership so what’s the harm in shaking it up a bit? The tasks that plagued early seasons should be quietly dropped and the airtime should instead be dedicated to matches, promo segments and video packages on the rookies. Videos showing the rookies and pros training together or spending time on the road would be a nice touch, and give the show a more realistic feel than the majority of WWE programming currently has. The company has enough money to be able to furnish each pro-rookie unit with a video camera to take on the road and record things. Obviously not everything would be appropriate for a TV audience but it would be a fresh approach to an established format.

NXT is also a good way of giving current stars something to do. Remember how the Miz grew as a character during the first and second seasons of NXT? Perhaps a Dolph Ziggler or a Cody Rhodes could use NXT to make the same progress. Curt Hawkins and Tyler Reks have somehow become regulars on the C-show, so why not use them as pros on a sixth season. The fact that they’re a team could make for an interesting storyline or rivalry involving their rookies.

Ted Dibiase, Jack Swagger, Jinder Mahal, Drew McIntyre and Santino would all be good additions to NXT. They could even find a use for Khali by pairing him up with a rookie who excels at promos and playing on the fact that Khali doesn’t speak good English. A healthy mixture of main event performers and underused Superstars regulars should be what WWE aims for when drawing up their new pro list.

This man's career would benefit from a return to the original NXT format

For NXT to function as it should changes need to be made. It should be a proving ground for young stars and a way for them to prove to management that they deserve to be on the main roster. It doesn’t work that way at the moment. But it wouldn’t take much to turn it into a worthwhile show for fans and competitors alike. Ultimately it’s going to help WWE build a future for itself, so they’re stupid not to spend time and money on it now. If they do then the next generation of wrestlers can finally start making waves.

Filler Eliminated

As was the case with January's Royal Rumble February's Elimination Chamber could have been so much more special than it was. A lack of proper planning and a dubious running order meant that the show ended up being just another filler event.
 
I'll begin my recap in the middle of the card with the SmackDown Elimination Chamber. That's the one that should have opened the show, because it had fewer big names and a lump like the Great Khali to incorporate. A spot involving Big Show breaking into Daniel Bryan's pod and smashing him through the allegedly bulletproof Plexiglas meant that the blue brand's cage clash had to go on after its RAW counterpart. Had it gone on first the RAW crew would have had a broken pod to contend with. Clearly that wasn’t an option.
 
This match had some big limitations to work around. Firstly Randy Orton was injured, and he clearly would have been booked as the star babyface and clashed with defending champion Daniel Bryan in the closing moments. His replacement, Santino Marella, may be over but he’s also a comedy figure and so was never going to convince anyone that he had a chance of winning. The other two good guys were limited in what they could do (severely limited in the case of 'The Punjabi Playboy'), and the three best workers in the match were all heels.
 
That's a lot to overcome, but all six men and the writing team pulled off a very enjoyable match. Big Show was booked as a monster and put over rising star Cody Rhodes on his way out. Both were good moves. Khali's involvement was kept brief so he didn't get the chance to ruin things. Barrett was booked to look dominant in the second half of the bout, battering both Bryan and Santino. The match's greatest strength lay in letting Daniel Bryan do what he does best in the closing moments: making a wrestler (in this case 'The Milan Miracle') far below him on the card look like his equal and genuine contender.
 
The World Heavyweight championship match was a triumph. Congratulations to everyone involved.
 
Sadly the same can’t be said of the RAW brand's Chamber extravaganza. It's not that the match was bad, it just didn't make the most of what it had. Dolph Ziggler and Kofi Kingston both deserved to be elevated with strong performances. Neither was. Kofi was one of the first two men in and lasted a fairly long time, but he was in there to make others look good and set up an angle between Jericho and Punk (I’ll get to that). He deserves a chance at cracking the main event scene. That didn't happen here and it's unlikely to happen any time in the foreseeable future.
 
'The Heel' was dealt an even worse hand than 'The Dreadlocked Dynamo’, lasting a shorter amount of time and being eliminated far too easily with a single Codebreaker. Miz got a better deal: he was one of the final two men in the match alongside defending champion CM Punk. That surprised me: he was rumoured to be in management's bad books after failing to catch R-Truth on RAW a few weeks ago so the last thing I expected was for him to be in the closing moments of the match alongside the WWE champion.
 
I dislike saying it but Miz shouldn't have made it that far. He had a fair chance to establish himself as a headliner last year and didn't manage it. That he's sunk back to the middle of the card in the last nine months is nobody's fault but his own. Ziggler would have been a better choice for that spot as he’s a man on the rise.
 
The other reason this match didn't go on higher on the card (besides Big Show wrecking the cage) was that the finish would have been and immensely disappointing way to end a pay-per-view. For those who are unaware Chris Jericho tossed Kofi Kingston through the open doorway after eliminating him then turned around into a kick from Punk that sent him sprawling to the aisle. He then lolled about on the concrete as though he'd suffered a concussion or some other injury that would prevent him from continuing (he hadn’t). That led to the climactic moments between Miz and the champ. Jericho didn't return to the cage and failed to be eliminated. I imagine this will be referenced on RAW this evening and lead to 'Y2J' demanding a one-on-one title match at WrestleMania. He will receive it.

In a strange in-ring segment we witnessed the return of both Alberto Del Rio and Christian. They both came out to advocate John Laurinaitis taking over the role of SmackDown GM from Teddy Long. I don’t think that would be a bad idea: Long has been in that role, on and off, for eight years now and has done everything he can in it. Laurinaitis appearing on both shows would allow the brand extension idea to be officially dissolved, which is in WWE’s best interests right now considering the shallow depth of the roster.

It was irritating that Christian returned here in an in-ring segment and not a month ago at the Royal Rumble or on Friday’s SmackDown to be included in the Chamber scrap. As he’s clearly being kept as a heel the decision makes sense, but I still think turning him emergency babyface and letting him perform what became Santino’s role would have been a better decision for business.

The view from Otunga's phone during the returning-heel heavy in-ring segment.

 
The filler matches were what you'd expect. Beth Phoenix and Tamina Snuka put on an enjoyable show that the crowd didn't care about. Surprisingly, nothing was set up for the Divas' division going into WrestleMania. Would it really have been that much effort to have Natalya get into an argument with her fellow Sister of Destruction or for Kharma to make her second appearance of 2012 for a stare-off with the champ?

The other filler match was Jack Swagger defending his worthless United States title against Justin Gabriel. The match was set up in a backstage skit that also involved Vickie Guerrero and Hornswoggle. It was as good as it sounds. Swagger won a limp showing that was oddly placed between the SmackDown Chamber match and the evening’s main event.

Which brings us nicely to the John Cena versus Kane Ambulance match. The two had an entertaining brawl that took in the seating area and some technical tables, before Cena got the inevitable win by AAing ‘The Big Red Monster’ off the top of the ambulance onto a waiting (and hidden from view) crash mat. This match accomplished its two main goals of ending the feud and making Cena look strong for his upcoming exchanges with The Rock. It did nothing else. That it went on last annoys me but ultimately it makes little difference because the card was such a washout. For the record, that decision was made so that the show ended with a face victory (Cena) instead of a heel victory (Bryan). At least we know WWE still thinks of things like that from time to time. That’s an encouraging sign.

Overall Elimination Chamber was another blown opportunity and it looks as though tonight’s RAW is going to be a better show, just as the post-Rumble RAW was superior to the Rumble. The Undertaker is confirmed to appear, Cena is going to start targeting Rock (which will be far more interesting than what he’s been doing with Kane) and there are said to be several big angles planned that will kick off WrestleMania feuds. WWE needs to get itself out of the habit of giving away appearances by big names on free television and start making audiences pay for them. This is not the way wrestling is supposed to work!