The SmackDown Spot

WWE have got Tyson Kidd, Justin Gabriel, Bad News Barrett, Luke Harper, Cody Rhodes, Kofi Kingston, the new and improved Sin Cara, Damien Sandow, and Dolph Ziggler sitting in the locker room. That’s a list that omits anybody who might be even remotely confused with a main eventer, guys like Cesaro and Bray Wyatt, and the perma-injured likes of Rey Mysterio (and, seemingly, Christian). Oh, and people who just aren’t particularly interesting like Zack Ryder and The Miz. It’s a bunch of talent not even appearing on the show.

There’s Evan Bourne sitting on the sidelines, having apparently been ready to return for over year from the injury he suffered in 2012. He’s a charisma vacuum, as are Kidd and Gabriel, but he’s capable of exciting matches. He’d be a fresh addition to the roster after so long away too.

They’ve even got access to David Otunga! He’s not appeared on TV in forever, despite having an incredible array of wrestling tools at his disposal (I know I’m in the minority on this but the guy’s valuable in roles other than Active Non-Gimmick Wrestler).

This had to happen apparently. I'd probably have been
fine if Hornswoggle weren't involved.

And yet somehow, for some reason, somebody made the decision to give Hornswoggle and El Torito a match on SmackDown. I’ve nothing against Torito. In fact I’ve enjoyed his JBL and Cole Show antics and the swagger he exhibits whenever he’s stationed at ringside. The guy’s entertaining. I’ve no time at all for Hornswoggle, but this isn’t really the point. Why are two gimmick seconds, one of whom hasn’t appeared in anything even approaching a meaningful capacity in years, getting time to have a match on TV when the names above aren’t even appearing?

Diego, Fernando and 2-out-of-3MB were at ringside on the show. Couldn’t they have had a tag match in place of Torito v Hornswoggle? So what if they’d had that exact match on Main Event. It would have been more entertaining than the leprechaun and the bull (even that four word description makes the match more fun than it could ever be). If repeating meaningless matches within the same week is against the rules then they could’ve done a six man instead and had ‘swoggle and Torito do the finish.

I appreciate that not everyone’s going to get on every show. With a roster so large people being relegated to the locker room is inevitable. But that’s not an excuse to exclude everyone. Give us someone off the list instead of nobody.

For all they’re getting a lot right these days WWE are still dropping the ball on little things (no pun intended). Next time can we have Kidd and Gabriel in matching trunks doing their storyline best to impress management enough to be awarded a tag title match? Please and thanks.

Pitch Perfect

The longer we wait the less likely the WWE Network seems to become.

They’ve experimented with creating new, not-entirely-wrestling-themed content for their YouTube channel over the last year or so and had a mixture of hits and misses. The Dolph Ziggler fronted Download was routinely excellent for example, while Foreign Exchange and Are You Serious? both had their moments too.

Like I say there were misses too. It’s generally considered that Zack Ryder’s show took hit a quality slump after being forcibly switched to WWE’s channel. You can’t win them all.

Anyway, I’ve been thinking recently that part of the reason for the holdup may be due to a lack of quality content ideas rather than just setup troubles. I’ve compiled a list of ideas below. WWE, you’re free to broadcast whatever you want.

Cooking with Ryback: Ryback bursts into the homes of unsuspecting contestants bellowing "Feed me more!" at the top of his voice and smashing furniture, not leaving until he has been appeased with a banquet served to him by the owners of the house. It should have the general air of a particularly bad segment from Noel's House Party, only stretched out for far longer.

You be the Judge: Friends and family members with long-standing disputes enter a mock courtroom and explain their grievances to Mick Foley (who's kitted out in judge's garb). 'The Hardcore Legend' then makes a ruling which all involved have signed legal documents to adhere to, shouting "That's hardcore, and now it's the law! Bang bang!" immediately after every proclamation. Videos are shown the following week recounting how those involved have found living according to Foley's ruling.

Greenwich Street: A learn-to-read and -count show in the style of Sesame Street, fronted by Triple H. The weekly number and letter are always three and H.

Spot the Difference: A series in which Jim Ross tries to tell the difference between any two people related to one another or who just look vaguely alike, stemming from his inability to tell Matt and Jeff Hardy apart. He never manages it.

T Time: Booker T reviews teas from around the world in his uniquely overblown play-by-play style, exhuming old catchphrases as he goes. Damien Sandow has a recurring role as a Voice of Reason.

Grooming Tips with Cody Rhodes: Cody Rhodes revives his old grooming tips segment, poorly reformatted into a half hour broadcast.

Travels with Cena: John Cena visits various landmarks, cities and countries around the world and bellows "The champ is here!" into the camera. It is nothing but this for an hour.

Being The Chosen One: Documentary series following WWE's resident 'Chosen One' Drew McIntyre. Offering in-depth interviews in which Drew opens up about going from being one of the company's hottest rising stars to arguably the least interesting member of 3MB who has to watch his mediocre ex-wife enjoying a more high profile spot in TNA.

Perspex Appreciation TV: Jinder Mahal hosts a nightly show looking at the different kinds of Perspex and all its various uses. Each episode begins with him reverently placing his turban into his Perspex Box™.

Knee Status Theatre: Drama series about the status of Rey Mysterio's perpetually injured knees. Stars Mysterio. Dr Shelby features in a supporting role as a psychiatrist Mysterio visits because he's glum about his hurty knees. Series finale sees Mysterio finally getting surgery, performed by the doctor that delivered Mae Young's plastic hand baby.

 

Give this guy his own Spanish language soap opera

 

Khali Karaoke: Three hours of non-stop singing from The Great Khali. This can include theme shows where he specialises in one artist or genre. I think we all want to hear Khali's rendition of Frank Sinatra’s My Way.

Stardust: Sitcom in which Dolph Ziggler and Goldust share a flat (or, as they’re American, an apartment) and both believe themselves to be Ziggy Stardust. Big E Langston has a recurring role as Biggy Stardust.

Titan Towers: Soap opera set in and around WWE's headquarters. The McMahon's would naturally feature prominently.

On the Sofa with Brodus: A late night chat show hosted by Brodus Clay. Sweet T, the Funkadactyls, and Brodus’s momma all feature as recurring characters.

Border Force: Jack Swagger revives JBL's old gimmick of patrolling the Mexican border to keep illegal immigrants out of his beloved United States. Hilarity ensues.

Snog, Marry, Avoid: Americanised remake of the questionably popular BBC Three show. Presented by Jerry Lawler. 'The King' gives his verdict on every contestant and never chooses avoid. Following every successful makeover a clip is played of Ron Simmons saying "Damn!"

Can Big Show Punch That?: A series in which viewers write in suggesting things for Big Show to punch. Big Show is then shown punching the objects, people, places or abstract concepts requested.

Otunga Law: Viewers tweet, Tout, email and write in with legal problems for celebrated lawyer, occasional wrestler and bodybuilding aficionado David Otunga. The former Nexus member dispenses advice with a wry smile and an occasional wink. He ends every episode with a prayer.

Tales of Grandpappy: Sheamus travels around North America visiting nurseries and elementary schools to regale children with (almost certainly fictional) stories of his (almost certainly fictional) grandfather. None of the kids enjoy his inane ramblings, causing 'The Celtic Warrior' to end every episode by Brogue kicking one of them.

SmackTalk 14.12.12

The heavy push of Sheamus is getting out of hand. Desperate to turn him into a valuable, money-drawing superstar WWE are trying every trick in the book to convince fans that he belongs at the top and is deserving of their support. The tried and tested roadblock method has been trotted out numerous times throughout the year in an effort to portray him as the valiant underdog battling insurmountable odds.
 
In theory it's a shrewd move. Overcoming adversity is one of the key attributes that makes someone a good guy in the wrestling business. Unfortunately WWE have used the trick so often with 'The Celtic Warrior' that it's become meaningless. We know heels are going to try to place limitations on Sheamus or weasel out of matches with him but we've seen several times that the Irishman always gets his way in the end. There's no reason to back him. He’ll succeed whether we support him or not.
 
The latest setback suffered by 'Great White' was an unintentional nudge to Big Show. 'The Giant' deliberately misinterpreted this as Sheamus disregarding their no contact before TLC agreement and demanded the match be scrubbed. Yep, schoolyard level antics between two men feuding over a world championship.
 
Naturally Sheamus didn't take kindly to this cowardice. He marched to the ring clenching a chair and (loudly) announced that if the match was off he'd have no reason not to attack Big Show. The champion, of course, backed down and the bout will take place as planned.
 
To my mind this made Sheamus look weak. He had to have a chair with him to be taken seriously by Big Show. It may be part of a storyline that started at Survivor Series but it doesn't do the challenger any favours. The scenario also made him look like a whiner. Again. Why would fans want to get behind a man who complains so much? That's what the bad guys are supposed to do.

This guy gobbles up screen time like there's no tomorrow

 
The ending of the episode seemed unsatisfactory too. This also involved Sheamus. 'Great White' had been facing Antonio Cesaro but had become distracted when Big Show appeared on the stage with an injured William Regal. Shaymo left the ring and minced up the ramp to confront Show, only to be stopped by Regal (the no contact clause, remember?), who was then smacked with a chair by Show.
 
The programme went off the air with Show and Sheamus glaring at each other. It was a complete anti-climax. When you remember that this was the final show of note before TLC it seems an even more ridiculous ending. In these situations we should see a fight, not intense glaring.
 
What should have ended the show was the Miz TV segment. That saw the incredibly over Ryback make an appearance (WWE have remembered that less is more with him at least) to fend off The Shield alongside Team Hell No. Not only were more popular acts involved with this portion of the show but it's also the bout that will headline TLC. It may have been another stare-off but with some of the men in the crowd it would have been more acceptable than the Show and Sheamus one. They weren’t within touching distance and it was booked to get Ryback over rather than to further a nonsensical clause.
 
SmackDown wasn't without its high points.  The Cesaro v Sheamus main event was very good until the end sequence begun. I'd like to see a proper feud between them at some point. The return of Cody Rhodes to Friday nights was also very nicely handled. Giving him and Sandow promo time helped them re-establish their tag team and get some heat. 'The Intellectual Saviour' was particularly good in this segment.
 
And that was SmackDown. A decent broadcast that didn't quite pull off the job of a "go home" show. But, sadly, that's normal.

Opening video

Tweet 1: Let's talk some Smack.

Tweet 2: These Shield guys seem to be catching on.
Tweet 3: Sheamus on the other hand...

R-Truth v Big Show

Tweet 4: Opening shot features Antonio Cesaro (Heeeey!) and his satchel. Lovely way to kick off the show.

Tweet 5: It's been ruined by the arrival of Big Show.
Tweet 6: JBL and Mathews don't seem interested in putting over the US title feud. It doesn't matter. Antonio doesn't need their help.
Tweet 7: There's a reason four man annoucne booths have never caught on.
Tweet 8: Sheamus thinks his match at TLC will be one of the toughest of Show's career. Um... Didn't Hogan once throw Show off a roof?
Tweet 9: In a car?
Tweet 10: #satchelbump
Tweet 11: That match existed only to highlight two singles feuds. It was okay for what it was.
Tweet 12: Sheamus lightly brushed Show and that will, in the heel's mind, be enough to have the title bout match cancelled. I can't see it somehow.
Tweet 13: This no contact thing is very similar to the banning of the Brogue Kick during the ADR programme. I didn't like that either.

Big Show and Booker T backstage

Tweet 14: Big Show fears no man.

Tweet 15: Booker hasn't cancelled the match. How predictable.

The Rhodes Scholars v The Usos

Tweet 16: #Sandowpop

Tweet 17: Sandow and Rhodes are best friends. Classic.

Best friends

Tweet 18: Sandow's reaction to the crowd's noise was brilliant. He needs a title in 2013.
Tweet 19: "Cody's moustache!" - The audience on Cody's moustache
Tweet 20: Why push a pay-per-view that will make you money when you can push the Slammy Awards?
Tweet 21: The Usos have "day one" written on their trunks. They are also brothers. Could it be more obvious they're stealing from the Briscoes?

David Otunga promo, featuring Big Show, Booker T and Sheamus

Tweet 22: Who do you go to if you're a WWE wrestler and you have a legal problem? Why, David Otunga of course.

Tweet 23: Oh good. We're getting a legality-based Otunga promo.
Tweet 24: Otunga is recapping a fake legal document. I can almost hear the ratings soaring.
Tweet 25: Booker should just make a match between Otunga and Show. It's what I'd do in this situation.
Tweet 26: Sheamus gets way too much air time. Less is more. If we're to embrace him as a top guy his appearances need to be kept to a minimum.
Tweet 27: Otunga sold that kick like he'd had an anvil dropped on his head.

The Shield assault Randy Orton backstage

Tweet 28: That's Orton off TV. Again.

Kaitlyn v Aksana

Tweet 29: Aksana's a wrestler again? Since when?

Tweet 30: Why is Kaitlyn wrestling in combat fatigues? Where is her wrestling gear? WHAT IS GOING ON?
Tweet 31: This match, like the Bret Hart v Shawn Michaels match at WrestleMania XII, is based around a headlock. I don't rate either.
Tweet 32: "Ask her!" - Aksana Jericho
Tweet 33: Kaitlyn overcomes a fearsome headlock to get the win with a generic move.
Tweet 34: It's worth noting that that match was a payoff to something that happened three months ago. Who says WWE doesn't treat the Divas seriously?

Matt Striker backstage

Tweet 35: Matt Striker standing outside a room containing Randy Orton there. Like a ruddy stalker.

Miz TV, featuring Daniel Bryan, Kane, The Shield and Ryback

Tweet 36: Miz TV. #boredface

Tweet 37: I miss Bryan's entrance music.
Tweet 38: Talking of Team Hell No's anger management therapy where's Dr Shelby?
Tweet 39: Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!
Tweet 40: Dean Ambrose's facial expressions remind me of Scott Hall. I hope he enters with a toothpick in his mouth at TLC.
Tweet 41: I think Ryback's hungry.

Hornswoggle, The Great Khali, Tyson Kidd and Justin Gabriel v The Prime Time Players, Epico and Primo

Tweet 42: Khali can't even walk convincingly!!

Tweet 43: I've changed my opinion on Titus O'Neil. I now think he's pretty entertaining. He's just not a very good wrestler.
Tweet 44: "I will be heading south tonight" - Josh Mathews, offering us a glimpse into his personal life
Tweet 45: Please can someone fire Hornswoggle?

Rosa Mendes takes a crisp bump...

Kofi Kingston v Alberto Del Rio

Tweet 46: Albertooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Dellllllll Riiiiiiiooooooooo!!

Tweet 47: ADR sporting some nice white trunks here. Perhaps a precursor to a babyface turn? That'd be a stupid move...
Tweet 48: How great would it be if Wade Barrett was disguised as the referee and attacked Kofi mid-match?
Tweet 49: Kofi wins a surprisingly good match on a rollup. It was portrayed as a fluke victory, natch.
Tweet 50: Barrett DOES attack, but he's not dressed in ref garb. Pity.

William Regal and Sheamus chat backstage

Tweet 51: This faux friendship between Regal and Sheamus makes me think less of Regal.

Tweet 52: Look into Regal's eyes as Sheamus is hollering. He looks bored.

Sheamus v Antonio Cesaro

Tweet 53: Antonio Cesaro. Heeeey!!

Tweet 54: Who covets the United States title, Josh?
Tweet 55: Cesaro is making Sheamus entertaining. Witchcraft?
Tweet 56: JBL is referencing football (soccer) on a wrestling broadcast. Practically nobody in the US will understand who or what he's talking about.
Tweet 57: Cesaro just powered up Sheamus. The big question is can he lift up Tensai without botching?
Tweet 58: Cesaro wins a stop-start match by count out. The right guy won in the wrong way.

SmackTalk 02.11.12

SmackDown is on a downswing. This week’s show didn’t feature Team Hell No. It didn’t feature the Rhodes Scholars. It didn’t feature Antonio Cesaro. It didn’t feature Ryback. It did feature lashings of Big Show and Sheamus though. So that’s… something.

Not every wrestling show is going to be great. I appreciate that. Sometimes there are duff episodes and sometimes you’ll get periods where there are creatively barren runs. Downswings and upswings are part of the nature of the business and always will be.

Just because a company (or show… or brand) is going through a rough patch creatively doesn’t mean those in charge have to make things worse for themselves. That’s what WWE did on Friday’s SmackDown. The company has booked itself into a corner with the Big Show v Sheamus and Alberto Del Rio v Randy Orton feuds. They are a contributing factor to the downswing. I’m not really enjoying either but I can tolerate them because I know that they are happening in part in order to kill time before bigger and better things kick off.

Where WWE are failing to help themselves is in omitting the talent mentioned at the top from shows. SmackDown, as I have written before, should be a show used to highlight and push men and women lower down the card. John Cena and CM Punk, the promotion’s top drawers, do not appear on the blue brand. That makes it the perfect place to give others time in the spotlight.

 

The Miz looks unhappy. Maybe the state of SmackDown is getting to him too

 

The Rhodes Scholars, Ryback and Antonio Cesaro have all benefitted from exposure on SmackDown this year. They are part of the reason I watch the show. When they are left off the show in favour of a match pitting babyface R-Truth against babyface Justin Gabriel something somewhere is clearly not right. Both Gabriel and Truth deserve TV time, but not necessarily against one another. Couldn’t that segment have seen the Rhodes Scholars or Three Man Band interrupt the match, igniting a tag team encounter?

Despite knocking the Show and Sheamus rivalry above I thought the tag team main event was a good idea. It kept their rivalry alive and mixed them up with another ongoing programme. I’m always a fan of that happening. I also thought it was good to get Kofi Kingston in such a high profile spot. If a downswing in creativity is what it takes for the writing team to push a man of his ability and charisma then perhaps we should hope for them more often.

Opening

Tweet 1: Soooooo... SmackTalk?

Tweet 2: This video package about Brad Maddox and the Cena and AJ nonsense is hilariously overdramatic.
Tweet 3: Big Show sounded aroused (sexually) in his Hell in a Cell backstage promo.
Tweet 4: Was John Cena wearing one of his own T-shirts in those shots of him eating dinner with AJ?

Miz TV, featuring Sheamus, Kofi Kingston and Big Show

Tweet 5: Has Sheamus been drinking?

Tweet 6: The lighting monkeys are dropping the ball. Is it Kevin Dunn's night off?
Tweet 7: Big Show. The champ is here.
Tweet 8: Two faces and two heels are in the arena. If this segment doesn't end with Teddy Long making a tag match I'm going to be disappointed.
Tweet 9: Had Big Show walked to the ring he would have been winded. There's a reason he's never been in an Iron Man match...

Big Show and Booker T backstage

Tweet 10: Big Show appears to be unaware of the cameraman walking backwards in front of him...

Tweet 11: Does Booker wear glasses to look smart? Doesn't work.
Tweet 12: The tag match everyone knew was coming has been made. Teddy didn't make it though. Shame.

Darren Young v Sin Cara

Tweet 13: Darren Young v Sin Cara? Oh God... #botchheaven

Tweet 14: JBL saying that the PTPs have the potential to be the best tag team in the world is going to be the funniest comment of the night.
Tweet 15: Sin Cara just lost clean to Darren Young. Remember that push he got when he first arrived?
Tweet 16: I've never noticed Titus's eyes do that before. Weird stuff. Freaky-looking guy.

Are the Prime Time Players the best tag team in the world? JBL thinks they could be

Rey Mysterio v Titus O’Neil

Tweet 17: Sin Cara may have jobbed clean but Mysterio won't. He's actually worth something.

Tweet 18: 'The Big Deal' jobbed clean. That's more like it. Good work, writers. Keep it predictable.
Tweet 19: I hate Rey Mysterio anyway but I particularly hate him when he's in a tag team. It's all stupid hand signs and hugging.

Recaps of various RAW happenings

Tweet 20: They just showed that graphic of Cena and AJ at dinner. Cena was indeed wearing his Rise Above Cancer merch.

Tweet 21: Brad Maddox is confirmed for RAW! That'll get the ratings up! Lucky Birmingham.

Booker T, Teddy Long, David Otunga and Natalya backstage

Tweet 22: Teddy and Booker. Prepare for a tag match...

Tweet 23: David Otunga doesn't get anywhere near enough TV time.
Tweet 24: This new spit take gimmick could be easily dropped though. Why WWE feels the need to include weird stuff like that is beyond me.
Tweet 25: Natalya seems to be involved in said weird stuff fairly often. Perhaps she's into it...

Randy Orton v Wade Barrett

Tweet 26: BARRETT RING COAT ALERT!!

Tweet 27: I'm a BIG fan of the Barrett ring coat. And the rose. The whole gimmick package really.
Tweet 28: What's random about Josh's questions exactly?
Tweet 29: Del Rio jumps Orton. Whaddavillain!
Tweet 30: There's a girl in the front row having a fit because she touched Randy Orton. If it was the other way round there'd be a court case.
Tweet 31: JBL keeps referring to Michael Cole. I thought we were shot of that guy.
Tweet 32: Perfectly adequate second rope elbow by Barrett, there.
Tweet 33: Barrett gets a win from a rollup. He could at least have been allowed to hit the Souvenir from behind for a distraction win.
Tweet 34: I wonder if Josh will mention Show and Miz's time as tag team champions (ShowMiz). Probably not.
Tweet 35: JBL might though.

Randy Orton and Alberto Del Rio have a brawl in catering

Tweet 36: "Randy Orton is not a biper" - Alberto Del Rio

Tweet 37: No! Not the catering area!
Tweet 38: This backstage food fight is ridiculous. The lack of commentary doesn't help. It's like they want us to think of it as very serious stuff.
Tweet 39: Randy Orton tries to walk through a table. #botchofthenight

David Otunga v Great Khali

Tweet 40: The Great Khali is back on SmackDown. Nobody noticed he'd gone. Nobody would have cared if they had.

Tweet 41: Khali's sabbaticals are never explained. I want to know what he gets up to when he's away from the ring.
Tweet 42: I like the idea of him tutoring underprivileged kids from rough neighbourhoods.
Tweet 43: What's David Otunga up to? Posing. Only posing.
Tweet 44: "Great Khali's hands are the size of laptops" - Josh Mathews
Tweet 45: Natalya is watching on a monitor She's happy. Because Otunga is getting beaten and he spat coffee on her earlier, you see.
Tweet 46: Yes, it's the beginning of the Otunga v Natalya feud we've all been waiting years for!

Justin Gabriel v R-Truth

Tweet 47: Gabriel versus Truth feels like an odd match. Presumably some heels will do a run-in. 3MB are my guess.

Tweet 48: Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe Undertaker will return to start a rivalry with Gabriel. That'd draw.
Tweet 49: Truth won. No idea what the point of the match was. Literally none.
Tweet 50: No heel run-in. No heel turn. No good match. That was a textbook example of a wasted segment.

Truth and Gabriel adhere to the Code of Honor

Miz and Big Show have a natter backstage

Tweet 51: Big Show is top bunk.

Tweet 52: Miz beat Josh and JBL to a mention of ShowMiz. Probably for the best...
Tweet 53: WWE should have Del Rio and Orton face one another in a Boiler Room Brawl.
Tweet 54: SmackDown's live next week? Won't it be about two in the afternoon when the show's filmed in Birmingham?
Tweet 55: The answer you're looking for is yes.

Big Show and The Miz v Kofi Kingston and Sheamus

Tweet 56: Big Show is holding the belt over his head because it won't fit around his waist.

Tweet 57: I want Show to work this match without taking the hoodie off.
Tweet 58: Big Show mat wrestling and throwing out random woooooos is brilliant. I want him to do that in every match.
Tweet 59: Charles Robinson looks like a haggard woman of 83.
Tweet 60: "Irishmen love to fight!" - JBL with a massive generalisation
Tweet 61: The heels win, ending the show on a low note. That's why they did Gabriel v Truth. It was designed as a fan pleaser.

Aristocratic Exposure

When Alberto Del Rio first appeared on WWE television in 2010 he was a breath of fresh air. A mixture of JBL and Ted DiBiase by way of Mexico Del Rio was given the rich braggart heel gimmick that always works so well and had been absent from WWE since Layfield departed in April 2009.
 
Since debuting ADR has racked up an impressive number of accolades. He won the 2011 Royal Rumble (the first ever to consist of 40 participants), challenged for the World Heavyweight championship at WrestleMania, wrestled Edge in what turned out to be 'The Rated R Superstar's' retirement match, won Money in the Bank, and became a two time WWE champion.
 
During his first year and a half with the company 'The Essence of Excellence' was involved in feuds with Rey Mysterio, Edge, Christian, Big Show, Sheamus, CM Punk, and John Cena. He's worked matches with pretty much every member of the roster he hasn't feuded with. In fact his recent programme with Randy Orton was one of the few fresh pairings left for him.
 
And that, in a nutshell, is the problem both he and WWE are now presented with. 'The Mexican Aristocrat' has achieved so much so quickly and blasted through the roster that he now feels stale as an act. With the exception of Ryback Del Rio has worked with every babyface of note and has competed in all of WWE's favourite match types.
 
Something needs to be done to revitalise the character.
 
Usually in these sorts of situations the solution is to turn the wrestler in question. This opens up new matches and booking scenarios for those scripting the show. Unfortunately I don't think this is an option here. Del Rio's WWE persona is a natural bad guy. There's nothing there that could be tweaked to make him an even moderately successful crowd pleaser. He is of most use to WWE left as a heel.

This guy's name is Alberto Del Rio. But you already knew that

 
The writing team aren't completely without options. Once his programme with 'The Viper' wraps up Del Rio could be given a few months off, allowing him to come back to television refreshed in the New Year. The Royal Rumble would be the perfect time for that. That scenario is not a great option though as it's rarely a good idea to have someone healthy and fit paid to sit at home. An alternative would be to station him in the developmental system for a while. That would allow him to do something productive, help to train the guys and gals we see on NXT, while also giving his character a rest.
 
If he stays on TV then Del Rio has an ongoing programme with Randy Orton that could comfortably stretch to Survivor Series. After that the potential feud with Ryback could be launched. Written well that should easily see both men through to TLC, which gives WWE plenty of time to build up one or two existing names as opponents for ADR. Kofi Kingston and Zack Ryder both spring immediately to mind as guys WWE could and should be doing more with.
 
The best thing WWE could do with the former CMLL champion would be to put him into a tag team. It would keep him on TV but allow him to develop his character by interacting with others. Mark Henry's currently sitting on the injured list. Why not bring him back to team with ADR? I think they'd be a great addition to the recently revived tag team division.
 
Thinking a little bigger Del Rio could be made the leader of a group. He already has Ricardo Rodriguez as his personal ring announcer and bump fodder for big matches. David Otunga could be brought back as his legal adviser (and more bump fodder) and 'The World's Strongest Man' could come on board in a bodyguard slash enforcer role, explaining that he enjoys hurting people and ADR will pay him a lot of money to do that. The Prime Time Players could bulk up the numbers, giving ADR henchmen and partners for six man tag matches. Put together in time this unit could be used to battle a face troupe lead by 'The Apex Predator' at Survivor Series.
 
Alberto Del Rio is not bad at anything his job requires of him. He is a victim of circumstance, hurt by WWE's thin roster and rapid approach to feuds. He can still be a great benefit, just not in his current role as a singles competitor. Let him help some other guys shine for a while.

SmackTalk 05.10.12

Because WWE have quietly dropped the concept of having two separate rosters you can never be entirely certain who you'll see on SmackDown. Surprisingly it's the headliners who WWE seem most concerned with keeping brand exclusive. CM Punk may have appeared on this week's episode but he doesn't make a habit of it. Nor does John Cena. Their SmackDown counterparts (Sheamus, Randy Orton and Alberto Del Rio) show up on RAW every week, but that's because every star of note needs to be used in order to facilitate the show's ridiculous three hour run time.
 
Beyond 'Great White', ADR, Big Show and 'The Viper' you can’t guarantee you’re going to see anyone when you tune in to the blue brand. While the show is the ideal vehicle for pushing promising acts like Damien Sandow, Cody Rhodes, Dolph Ziggler, and Ryback they’re not guaranteed to appear. Even upper mid-card guys like Daniel Bryan and The Miz aren't always on.
 
This is part of the problem SmackDown faces on a weekly basis. With less than half a dozen regular cast members there are few reasons for viewers to watch regularly. That it's used more and more to recap the events of RAW doesn't help either. If WWE made sure to include a popular guy like Ryback or Ziggler on every show they'd stand a chance of increasing their viewing numbers (and would help give talent more TV time too). Better yet, they could announce a match for Friday's show on Monday's live RAW. The goal should be to give people reasons to tune in to SmackDown each week, not just muddle through with an average show.

This week’s SmackDown was a perfect example of this stifling approach to booking and talent elevation. While CM Punk made a surprise appearance and wrestled an enjoyable (but brief) match with Dolph Ziggler the Rhodes Scholars and Antonio Cesaro were notable by their absence. They’re acts that need as much exposure as possible if they are to become members of the roster that can be depended upon for carrying the company into the future.

In other news SmackDown’s new batch of feuds currently seem underwhelming. The prospect of an extended series of matches between Alberto Del Rio and Randy Orton isn’t too bad because it’s a relatively fresh pairing and there’s the chance to book ‘The Viper’ against ADR’s associates David Otunga and Ricardo Rodriguez to keep things fresh.

What’s frustrating is that Orton’s dispute with Dolph Ziggler has been dropped prematurely. ‘The Show Off’s’ rise up the ranks would have benefited from another pay-per-view outing with ‘The Apex Predator’, perhaps one in which he was allowed to win. Facing Orton is about the best thing that could happen to ADR but Friday’s segment doesn’t indicate that the feud will be enjoyable. Let’s hope their matches are better and Orton’s free to make a few sporadic appearances while filming his WWE Studios film.

The other new feud over on the blue brand is Sheamus versus Big Show. Just one week in and it’s already shaping up to be just as tiresome as ‘The Celtic Warrior’s’ ponderous dispute with Del Rio. On RAW the two participated in a Q&A session which amounted to them sniping at one another. SmackDown saw them cost each other matches against Tensai and Miz. Hardly gripping television.

The once routinely enjoyable SmackDown has fallen in terms of quality lately. I’d like to see it get back on form. For that to happen there needs to be a greater focus on giving people a reason to watch and using SmackDown as a platform to create new stars.

Big Show promo, featuring Sheamus

Tweet 1: SmackDown. Let's tweet!

Tweet 2: What's the best way to kick off a wrestling programme? It's hard to top a Big Show promo.
Tweet 3: They're showing a video of Big Show punching and choke slamming people. What it's meant to prove isn't clear.
Tweet 4: Show just referred to Cena as 'The Franchise'. Haven't heard that for a while.
Tweet 5: Big Show doesn't have time to shake hands. He has to go backstage and eat four live cows.

The Prime Time Players v Kofi Kingston and R-Truth

Tweet 6: Kofi Kingston and R-Truth enter and fans are shown walking towards the bathrooms. Not a good sign, is it?

Tweet 7: Truth shouts "What's up?" I wish the audience would reply "Not much!"
Tweet 8: Titus O'Neil is a very angry man.
Tweet 9: Darren Young and his giant knee pads are going to the semi-finals. Excellent. That should ensure Cara and Mysterio have a great match...
Tweet 10: "It's feeding time: next!" - Josh Mathews, in reference to a Ryback match

Ryback v Primo (or Epico)

Tweet 11: Josh, I don't think Ryback "literally" believes WWE is a jungle.

Tweet 12: Is Ryback squashing Epico or Primo? It doesn't matter.
Tweet 13: Ryback's finisher is called Shellshock. I don't think I've mentioned that before.

The question is: could Ryback do this to CM Punk?

CM Punk and Paul Heyman backstage

Tweet 14: CM Punk on SmackDown? I'll take that.

Tweet 15: And he's looking for Dolph Ziggler's room. Even better. Why does Dolph still have a SmackDown room? He's a RAW guy now.

Alicia Fox v Layla

Tweet 16: Layla has the most inappropriate entrance music in WWE.

Tweet 17: "Layla still fuming over losing the Divas championship" - Josh Mathews as Layla skipped, danced and smiled her way to the ring
Tweet 18: I miss Booker T's commentary.
Tweet 19: Northern Lights botchplex.
Tweet 20: Alicia Fox with a 1970s style leg submission hold there.
Tweet 21: Layla with a garbled post-match promo. Her accent flitting from British to pseudo-American didn't help.

CM Punk and Dolph Ziggler backstage

Tweet 22: Bad news: Punk and Ziggler are having an argument. Good news: Booker T is around to sort it out.

Wade Barrett v Unnamed Enhancement Talent

Tweet 23: BARRETT KLAXON.

Tweet 24: Barrett has stolen Ryback's gimmick of beating nobodies. The nobody in question has stolen a pair of Perry Saturn's trunks.

The Miz v Sheamus

Tweet 25: World champ Sheamus didn't get a televised entrance. IC champ The Miz did. Peculiar.

Tweet 26: They need to stop wittering on about this being champion versus champion. If neither title's on the line it doesn't matter.
Tweet 27: Cole just referred to Miz returning. Hasn't he been back since July?
Tweet 28: Sheamus wants to use the Brogue Kick? Isn't that banned? No, my mistake... That lasted all of five minutes.
Tweet 29: This Show v Sheamus feud is AWFUL. We have at least another four weeks of it.

David Otunga promo, featuring Alberto Del Rio

Tweet 30: "My name is David Otunga" - David Otunga

Tweet 31: Otunga is praising Alberto Del Rio for attacking Randy Orton on last week’s show. If you're not watching you're not missing much.
Tweet 32: So has Orton's feud with Ziggler ended? If so I'm disappointed. That could and should have gone for a few months.
Tweet 33: Del Rio has really gone downhill. I'm bored of him. It feels like he's done evertthing he ever will. Future endeavor him.
Tweet 34: You can tell Teddy long is storyline mentoring Booker T: a tag match was just made mid-segment.

Alberto Del Rio and David Otunga v Team Hell No

Tweet 35: ADR and Otunga seem like weird opponents for Hell No but who cares? It means we get to see Daniel Bryan. All together now...

Tweet 36: Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!
Tweet 37: #Otungaflex
Tweet 38: Bryan needs to do the Hogan pose routine during every match.
Tweet 39: "Here comes the big red monster" - Josh Mathews, undoing his trousers
Tweet 40: Otunga's on job duty. Again.
Tweet 41: Apparently Daniel Bryan is the tag team champions...
Tweet 42: Kane disagrees.

Another week another argument between Kane and Daniel Bryan

Eve, Teddy Long, and Booker T backstage

Tweet 43: More GM related shenanigans. There are (still) troubles brewing in the Booker T administration.

Tweet 44: Booker's always talking about having business to take care of yet he never actually seems to do any work.

Tensai v Big Show

Tweet 45: It's finally time for the hotly anticipated heel versus heel match between Tensai and Big Show.

Tweet 46: Tensai: WWE's most blubbery jobber.
Tweet 47: Big Show hits his iffy-looking spear. He doesn't go for the stomach, he spears the shoulders.

Anyone else think this looks like Tensai is falling backwards on to Show?

Dolph Ziggler v CM Punk

Tweet 48: SmackDown: the home of heel versus heel matches.

Tweet 49: Punk and Ziggler are two of the best in WWE. Even with only around ten minutes I think they'll produce something enjoyable.
Tweet 50: I like the way Michael Cole says diesel.
Tweet 51: Ziggler never hits the Fameasser anymore. #BadAssBillyZiggler
Tweet 52: Punk loves standing on the announce desk to cut a promo.
Tweet 53: He's still not facing Cena at Hell in a Cell. Something tells me he'll change his mind...

SmackTalk 14.09.12

For the second week in a row SmackDown began with David Otunga, Alberto Del Rio and Ricardo Rodriguez demanding the ban of the Brogue Kick. What made this situation particularly puzzling was that they had already achieved their goal at the conclusion of the previous week’s show. Naturally Michael Cole and Josh Mathews failed to draw attention to this and sat slumped at ringside as Otunga wittered on about banning the already banned move.

Repeated opening segment aside I thought it was a decent episode, although there was nowhere near enough hype for Night of Champions considering the show aired two days before the pay-per-view. That’s something that WWE used to do very well but have lapsed on over the last couple of years. Perhaps evaluating their selling strategy could result in a few more buys.

The highlight of the show was the tussle between World champion Sheamus and Daniel Bryan. Billed as a WrestleMania rematch, because ‘The Celtic Warrior’ beat Bryan at that show with the now banned Brogue Kick (flimsy reasoning or what?), it was a believable, compelling bout that showed Sheamus at his finest and made a pleasant change from his seemingly endless series with Alberto Del Rio. ‘Beuatiful’ Bryan was, as usual, superb.

Kane and Kofi Kingston had a far better match than I thought they would. A face versus face match with one man booked as a monster is a difficult thing to pull off and they did it very well here. Kingston deserves particular praise for his performance after the match as well: his expression when hugged by ‘The Big Red Machine’ was amusing.

I was interested to see Brodus Clay and Tyson Kidd interact with Antonio Cesaro. Either man would make a good rival for the United States champion and might actually stand a chance of generating a little interest in Cesaro’s currently meaningless trinket.

Kidd is capable of working lengthy, athletic matches with ‘The Swiss Superman’. It could be his ticket to a purposeful spot in the mid-card. ‘The Funkasaurus’ is not as athletically gifted as the man from Calgary (although he is very agile for a man of his size) but he would be a good choice to work short comedy matches with the champ. Cesaro has a talent for funny bouts and takes big bumps for a larger man. I think he could turn out to be a good opponent for Brodus.

I assume that either Kidd or Clay will challenge Cesaro at Night of Champions. A new feud involving any of the three would be a positive thing.

The final thing I feel I should mention is the first time ever clash between Tensai and Randy Orton. A frivolous backstage promo before the match revealed that ‘The Viper’ had requested Tensai as his opponent. When asked why Orton gave a simple “Why not?”

Such an attitude is going to do the former A-Train no favours. Not that that matters. WWE have already ruined any chances they had of making the best use of Tensai by halting his push and making too many alterations to his gimmick. Had Tensai been treated as a big deal and been used as a pay-per-view regular then his first televised clash with ‘The Apex Predator’ could have been used to attract viewers or entice PPV buys.

I’ve written this before (here) and WWE will make the same mistake in the future. Because they can.

Opening video

Tweet 1: A boring recap is followed by the hilariously dramatic meeting between Otunga and Sheamus that (allegedly) took place at Titan Towers.

Tweet 2: Interesting to note that when they cut to the black and white camera no cameramen were visible. #vintageWWE

David Otunga, Alberto Del Rio and Ricardo Rodriguez try to have the Brogue Kick banned… again

Tweet 3: In the ring Ricardo Rodriguez is crying and speaking in English while David Otunga sells a neck brace.

Tweet 4: Most boring. Opening segment. Ever.
Tweet 5: Christian has lost a year of his career to the Brogue Kick. I thought it was that broken ankle he suffered and writer indifference...
Tweet 6: No... No... No...
Tweet 7: They're using every trick in the book to try and make Sheamus a rebellious anti-hero. It's not convincing.
Tweet 8: The only man to get a reaction in that segment was Daniel Bryan, the one not involved in the World title scene right now. Brilliant.
Tweet 9: Get the belt off Sheamus and put it on Dolph Ziggler.

Sin Cara v The Miz

Tweet 10: Here's Sin Cara, the man nobody cares about.

Tweet 11: I was expecting Miz v Sin Cara at Night of Champions. I'm pleased it's being left off the PPV. I don't expect this to be good.
Tweet 12: A four way including Rhodes and Mysterio should be far more enjoyable.
Tweet 13: For a guy pushed as a high flyer Sin Cara really enjoys a good rest hold.
Tweet 14: If the writing team was better I'd assume that Sin Cara pinning Miz clean was going to lead to something.

Teddy Long, The Miz, Cody Rhodes, Rey Mysterio and Sin Cara backstage

Tweet 15: Why isn't Teddy Long the GM? He's being booked like one.

Tweet 16: Now that I've seen Miz is inexplicably being booked like an underdog babyface I have a feeling he could retain on Sunday.

Kane v Kofi Kingston

Tweet 17: Kane and Bryan could do so much as a tag team. Could they rebuild the doubles division? Don't get your hopes up.

Tweet 18: Kane versus Kofi Kingston is a style clash waiting to happen.
Tweet 19: Truth isn't accompanying Kofi. Little Jimmy's out there though.
Tweet 20: That was a surprisingly good match. Both men played their roles very well.
Tweet 21: Dr Shelby is on the stage! That's a promising sign for him becoming Kane's on-screen manager.

Shelby needs to become a TV regular

Matt Striker interview Randy Orton

Tweet 22: Note the glee in Striker's eyes as he introduces Orton.

Tweet 23: Orton treats Striker with disdain. Good.
Tweet 24: Orton didn't really give a reason for wanting to face Tensai.
Tweet 25: He could've just said "Because he's a glorified jobber so it's a guaranteed win."

Tensai v Randy Orton

Tweet 26: Nobody acknowledges Sakamoto anymore. He doesn't even get a graphic.

Tweet 27: Tensai v Orton is a first time meeting. Had WWE booked Tensai since he returned then this could have drawn some pay-per-view buys.
Tweet 28: Tensai is a heel straight out of the 80s.
Tweet 29: "Tensai's going to put Orton away here!" - Michael Cole seconds before Orton went over clean
Tweet 30: When Randy Orton is an old man he will look fascinating.

This match could have meant something

Antonio Cesaro’s heat-seeking segment

Tweet 31: Antonio Cesaro… Heeeey!!

Tweet 32: Cesaro's facial expressions: priceless.
Tweet 33: Remember that Tyson Kidd mini-push a few months ago? No, me neither...
Tweet 34: Tyson Kidd is not a good substitute for Cameron and Naomi.
Tweet 35: I assume from that that it will be either Clay or Kidd wrestling Cesaro on Sunday. Both would be good choices.

Erm... yeah...

Brief and pointless Wade Barrett appearance

Tweet 36: Tuning in to see Wade Barrett's ring coat? Then you're going to be disappointed...

Kaitlyn v Beth Phoenix

Tweet 37: If this Divas match didn't involve Kaitlyn I'd consider skipping it.

Tweet 38: Cole's talking about Backstage Fallout. It's a pointless YouTube show. Anything worthwhile that happens on there should be booked for RAW.
Tweet 39: "Ask her, ref!" - 'Y2J' Beth Phoenix
Tweet 40: Kaitlyn pins Phoenix clean. That either says something about her chances at beating Layla or Beth's standing in WWE. I'm not sure which.

Booker T, Eve and Teddy Long backstage

Tweet 41: Booker T gets on better with Eve than he does with Teddy Long. What a compelling slice of storyline.

Daniel Bryan v Sheamus

Tweet 42: FELLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!

Tweet 43: No... No... No... No... *shakes head* ... No...
Tweet 44: This referee looks like a young Benedict Cumberbatch.
Tweet 45: Cole just described Dean Malenko as "great." I don't disagree but it does beg the question of why he's not in the WWE Hall of Fame.
Tweet 46: Look at Sheamus, hurling himself off the top rope like a sack of wet cement.
Tweet 47: #nokicks
Tweet 48: "Sheamus's face almost turning crimson here" - Josh Mathews, who may just have been looking at his hair
Tweet 49: They didn't even tease the Brogue Kick. What a confusing storyline.