The Global Announce Team

A few weeks ago Jeff Jarrett announced that his e-fed would be airing New Japan's Wrestle Kingdom 9 on pay-per-view in the US and Canada. It was a significant announcement followed up by instructions for people to stay tuned for news. 'Double J' has to promise news instead of providing it because he doesn't have a promotion of his own and is reliant on New Japan making decisions before he can release information. It’s a less than ideal way to run a business.

But a week ago Jarrett struck a deal that will see Jim Ross provide English language play-by-play commentary for the show, something he was able to tell the world himself. It was presented as big news when announced on November 11. And it is.

Slobberknocker! Sauce it! Bah GOD! Stone Cold! Stone Cold! Stone Cold!!

As the voice of WWE when it was at its hottest Ross is a known quantity to many lapsed and casual fans, a market Jarrett is probably interested in attracting. He's also an experienced wrestling commentator, with a solid knowledge of moves, an understanding of how to convey a match's story to an audience, and an unparalleled level of passion¹. He was the best choice to lead an English language broadcast and, considering his promotion's completely hypothetical status at the moment, Jarrett was lucky to get him.

But 'Good Old JR' is not flawless. Even at his late 90s-slash-early 00s peak he was prone to frequent minor mistakes. This usually took the form of confusing names of guys he was less familiar with who kind of but not really looked alike. Hardly the worst thing in the world but it presents an obvious problem for WK9. NJPW's roster is almost entirely new to Ross, and a lot of the guys he's already familiar with will be using different names.

Obviously there's ample time for Ross to familiarise himself with the roster. And being a professional I'm sure he will. While he's in prep mode it may be a good idea for someone to warn him about the flagrant anti-psychology that plagues Young Bucks matches. Better than him finding out on the air.

The other issue with JR is that he does his best work when being needled by an antagonistic colour commentator². His work alongside Paul Heyman in 2001 and Jerry Lawler in the years before (but not really after) that was so good because both Lawler and Heyman knew how to interact with Ross's on-air personality to get the best out of him. They knew to prick his ego every so often and provide him with anti-babyface material to get riled about. Basically, they knew how to be very good heel commentators and Ross knew how to be a very good babyface one.

It's not that JR's commentary will be bad without a good heel colour commentator with him but it’s likely he'll be better with one. Thinking of suggestions for the role is pretty much a waste of time because there's no defined Global Force roster in existence to draw names from. The only realistic suggestion to make is Jarrett. He's been established as a heel within New Japan storylines and would be easy enough to accept in the role for an English language audience. I've never heard him on commentary but Ross could coach him and help him prepare. Plus he's already going to be in Tokyo for the show and it would cut down on costs. I’m sure that’s a factor for an imaginary company like Global Force.

Whether they go for Jarrett or a more left field but probably better choice like Colt Cabana or Chris Hero (I would be astounded if they got CM Punk³) I hope the pairing gets adequate time to prepare. If English language commentary is to become a thing⁴ for NJPW (and less importantly if GFW is to succeed) Wrestle Kingdom 9 needs to be a success in North America. And rightly or wrongly a lot of that is on the shoulders of Jim Ross.

***

¹ I’m particularly looking forward to him shouting “Okada! Okada! Okada!!”

² Ideally with that colour commentator being fed digs by Vince McMahon over a headset, not that that's an option here⁵.

³ Though he'd be ideal, obviously. He knows the product and Ross and has a fair amount of commentary experience. Plus he's a big enough name to generate some US interest in the pay-per-view, New Japan, and GFW. But it won’t happen.

⁴ I hope English language commentary catches on because the lack of it is the biggest barrier for plenty of people (including myself) following New Japan more closely.

⁵ Although if Vince were to ever to get involved with production of a rival promotion's commentary I'm sure it would be solely to take shots at Jim Ross.

The Part Time Squad

WWE’s reliance on the stars of the past has been well documented over the last several years. The Rock’s return at WrestleMania XXVII and matches at XXVIII and XXIX drew scorn from some. Triple H and Undertaker taking an annual ‘Mania spot has also failed to go down well with everyone. And guys like Chris Jericho, Batista and Hulk Hogan have also returned in one form or another, to a variety of reactions.

There could be said to be broadly two views on this. The first would be that the returning stars help to attract viewers who wouldn’t otherwise be interested and that their participation helps give the events that extra special feeling they’re meant to have. The second would be that the returnees take away spots from the roster members who work a full schedule and deserve to participate at a show of WrestleMania’s significance.

My view lies somewhere in the middle of the two. The returning stars are necessary for shows like WrestleMania to be distinguishable from the rest of the PPV pack. I don’t think WWE could expect to fill more than one stadium for a ‘Mania using only their current roster, and they’d only manage one because tickets are sold so far in advance. But at the same time I don’t think the list of returning names would need to be as long as it generally gets if WWE did a better job of making guys like Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, Cesaro and Dolph Ziggler seem like they’re genuinely big stars. Part of WrestleMania absolutely should be about celebrating the past and integrating older stars, but it should also be about building for the future.

Something that could be done differently is how the returning names are used. Right now they tend to interact exclusively with one another. Jericho v Fandango and Triple H v Daniel Bryan aside all the names listed above have been involved with other stars from past eras at the last few WrestleManias. An argument could be made for CM Punk being raised up with his matches against The Undertaker and The Rock, but Punk was already pretty close to that level anyway. And, y’know, he lost both matches. By the time he left he was definitely on that level.

I’d be far more interested in a Triple H versus Dean Ambrose match than I would in a Triple H versus The Rock match. The former is a match that could easily take place at WM31, WWE having ample time to prepare it. The latter is a match the men themselves talked about on the SmackDown fifteenth anniversary show and while I don’t think it’s especially likely to happen it’s not an impossibility. That it was brought up on company programming indicates that WWE were interested in seeing how people reacted to talk of the bout.

For whatever reason WWE doesn’t seem interested in pitting the veteran performers against the younger batch of stars. Perhaps they feel the youngsters are beneath the vets. That will cause a problem in years to come if true because sooner or later it will bleed through into the televised product and the current roster could be viewed as second rate in terms of star power.

More likely, given the matchups we’ve had over the last few years, they feel the Dream Match™ route is the best one to take. Their idea of what constitutes such a match can at some times be questionable (Cena versus Rock headlining two ‘Manias in a row f’r’instance) but it’s a solid enough approach. With all of this in mind I thought I’d run through the various part-timers WWE does and could make use of and look at the possible opponents, both part- and full-time, they could be pitted against at the next few ‘Manias.

We’ll start with Mr Hulk Hogan. He’s a pretty big star, right? Well, yes and no. He was undoubtedly wrestling’s biggest star in the 1980s and for much of the 90s, but his status has been somewhat diminished by the likes of Rock, Austin and Cena. His stint in TNA didn’t help him either. That gave anyone who saw it the impression that he’s washed up. He obviously was washed up but that TNA really emphasised it. It wore off what mystique he was still clinging to and he’s only started getting it back since he started the sporadic appearances for WWE.

He says he's got one more leg drop left in him, brothers!

‘The Hulkster’ has dropped a number of unsubtle hints about wanting to wrestle a retirement match for WWE. I suspect there are a number of motives for this. One would be the hefty payday. Another would be the chance to get himself into the spotlight one more time, something he has adored throughout his career. Third would be the opportunity to go out on top. I mean, Hogan clearly hasn’t been on top of wrestling since 19-take-your-pick, but having a retirement match on the upper half, possibly even in the main event, of a ‘Mania card would do a lot to sate his legendary ego.

There’s only one man I think Hogan could or should come back to face. That’s John Cena. The reason is pretty obvious. It would be the biggest current star against one of the biggest stars of the past. They would not have an especially good match but it would be a spectacle, and there’s always a room for spectacle at WrestleMania. Cena’s capable (though he wouldn’t necessarily be willing) of bouncing around to make Hogan look good. Hogan could probably take an AA. It’s the only feasible match should a Hogan comeback occur.

Next is the man who Hogan made his initial ‘Mania comeback against back at X8, The Rock. I’ve already mentioned the tease WWE made of a Rock versus Triple H ‘Mania outing. It would be interesting from a historical point of view because they never wrestled in a singles match at the event, despite having a feud that lasted years and took them both from the mid-card to the main event. While doing the match now would allow them to tick off an accomplishment it wouldn’t live up to their past standards. Between 1998 and 2000 the pair had a number of memorable matches on TV and pay-per-view. They’re older now, and ‘The Great One’ is extra cautious of doing anything that could inflict an injury for fear of losing work in Hollywood, and they wouldn’t be able to match their previous high standards. It’s a match best left in the past.

Rock versus Brock Lesnar has a certain appeal to it: the Hollywood A-lister facing the former UFC champion. It’s the sort of thing WrestleMania has always been built around: mainstream, outside-wrestling appeal. But it’s unlikely to happen with Lesnar’s status as champ as it would need to be for the title and I don’t think either would be back before SummerSlam. Rock’s health and safety gimmick would probably make this match a no, too.

Rock versus Rusev is a potential match after their surprise interaction on the October 6 RAW. I think it could be a very good match. Rusev’s selling and psychology are good and constantly improving and he’s got a convincing, and over, set of moves. It would make sense to promote this match and there’s a reason for it happening. But I don’t think WWE will do it. The most I think we can expect is a second meeting on TV which ends with Rusev looking strong. That would help him, but not as much as a WrestleMania victory in an official match would.

Other than ‘The Bulgarian Brute’ no characters from the main roster jump out as a particularly good match for Rock. I think Cesaro would be a particularly nice fit match-wise, but not enough time has been invested in his character to make it seem a realistic possibility. Meanwhile I think there’s a natural story to be told between Rock and Roman Reigns, not least because they’re cousins, but the in-ring action would let them down. Reigns is not yet experienced enough as a singles wrestler to make this bout work. But if Rock’s still around for WrestleMania 33 in 2017 it might be a good idea.

Going back to Brock Lesnar there are a surprising number of options. Roman Reigns is top of the list as beating Lesnar for the WWE championship at ‘Mania 31 would be a nice crowning-of-the-heir-apparent moment. But even though it would make sense it’s not been announced as a thing yet. ‘The Beast’ could just as easily find himself working a rematch with The Undertaker or having his first main roster dalliance with Randy Orton. Had a better job been done of splitting Paul Heyman and Cesaro then there’d be a compelling, natural story to be told for Cesaro versus Lesnar. It could still be done, but the time for making it mean as much as it could has slipped through WWE’s fingers.

Since the loss of his Streak I’ve found myself less interested in the concept of further Undertaker appearances. It’s not because the Lesnar bout was bad (although it was), it’s because the main appeal of ‘The Dead Man’ for me had become seeing him increase The Streak’s length. It added an urgency to his bouts that just can’t be there now. I’d convinced myself that he’d go for another year or two, announce his final match before it took place, and have Cena as his opponent. Cena, more than Lesnar, would have been able to convince people before the match that he was going to end The Streak. Because he’s Cena. My logic was that if WWE were going to end The Streak for anyone it would be Cena.

But that all fell apart when Lesnar pinned ‘Big Evil’ at WrestleMania XXX. ‘The Phenom’ will still be able to have good matches (if his body permits it) but they just won’t be as suspenseful. He could have his rematch with Lesnar and win, but ultimately it wouldn’t matter. The blemish on his record would still be there.

A lot of people seem to want Sting v Undertaker. I’ve said before that I would have no interest in seeing that match. Sting as a performer does nothing for me and any analogies between his role in WCW and ‘Taker’s in WWE are lost on me. One went off the rails because he felt betrayed during an invasion of cool heels, the other’s a zombie biker who digs MMA. The most that can be said in favour of them being a particularly good pairing is that they are both synonymous with their respective promotions. But WCW closed down in 2001. At this point Sting v Undertaker would be as much TNA v WWE as WCW v WWE.

But a lot of people want to see it. There’s obviously something I’m missing. That people seem keen on it makes me think that Undertaker versus ‘The Stinger’ is the most sensible match for both men at ‘Mania 31. Personally I’d be more interested in either man in a singles match against Bray Wyatt. He’s a better fit for the characters of both veterans. But I doubt that will come to pass.

I suspect a lot of people would argue that Sting v Triple H would be a good match. It’s true that both are top tier performers, but something about their respective styles makes me think they wouldn’t gel well together. Neither strikes me as a significant enough name to make the match work. There’s no obvious story to tell between the pair either.

‘The Game’ is best off working against guys getting established. He’s a respected (within WWE TV Land at least) performer, a former multi-time world champion, and the on-screen boss. His status is why guys would want a match with him and his job allows him to be easily written into necessary stories. The Daniel Bryan story worked well. More along those lines would be fine. Dean Ambrose, Bray Wyatt and Cesaro would be my top choices for matches against Trips. In time there’s a very obvious Seth Rollins match waiting to be presented too.

One guy I’m not especially interested in seeing Tripper wrestle is Batista. Since leaving over the summer he’s mentioned in interviews that he’d be interested in returning for a retirement match against ‘The King of Kings’ at a WrestleMania. Which says a fair bit about how ‘The Animal’ sees his status within WWE history. In fairness Triple H v Batista would make sense as a retirement match, given their history as friends and opponents. It would be a neat ending to Big Dave’s career. It just doesn’t feel like a modern day ‘Mania match, partly because they faced off at a ‘Mania before and partly because I don’t think Batista quite deserves that level of send-off. To me it feels more like a SummerSlam idea.

I think Batista would be of more value facing an Ambrose or a Cesaro at future WrestleManias. But such matches are probably beneath his ego, even if he were to win them. A bout with Lesnar would likely satisfy him, with or without the title on the line, but the trouble there is the same as with The Rock: Batsy has to keep himself as healthy as possible for Hollywood duties and Lesnar is not conducive to that. It would be a fresh pairing though of established headliners though, and that counts for a lot with me.

A man it would be easy to overlook here is Goldberg. No, he’s never been on the best of terms with WWE. No, they don’t seem to regard him as any form of exceptional draw (and in fairness there’s little evidence that they should). But if Sting is going to get mentioned Goldberg should too. At his peak Goldberg was just as big a star for WCW as Sting.

Were The Streak still intact a decent story could have been built around ‘Taker pitting it against Goldberg’s mostly perfect win-loss record. WWE could have ignored ‘berg’s handful of jobs or acknowledged them and emphasised the screwiness of most of them, either approach would have done the job. A year and a half ago Goldberg would have been a good choice of opponent for Ryback. ‘The Big Guy’ was getting compared to Goldberg every week and it would have given him a boost to face and beat the former WCW champ. It may seem a peculiar thing to say now, given Ryback’s lower-card status, but had WWE handled him better during his rushed rivalry with CM Punk and into WrestleMania XXIX they could have made a headliner out of him.

Those are wasted opportunities. There’s no obvious scenario for Goldberg at a WrestleMania now. But he’s a big enough name to attract a few eyes, especially if he was given the Hall of Fame and retirement match package (not that WWE would deem him worthy of that). The Ryback match could still just about work, just not as well as it could have previously. Beyond that matches with Brock Lesnar, Cesaro or a more embedded Roman Reigns could work nicely.

One more year for Angle. But it probably won't be in WWE.

Goldberg is also one of the many names that could work as an opponent for Kurt Angle. WWE’s fledging roster split stopped it happening during Goldberg’s previous run, which was a pity as the pair seem like a natural fit: the powerhouse and the technician. The trouble is that Angle would likely be taken as the face and Goldberg the heel, and both do their best work in the opposite roles. The more significant trouble with doing this match nowadays is that Angle is falling to pieces and Goldberg isn’t exactly known for his safety.

The really obvious Angle match would be opposite Rusev. He’s a foreign heel who talks about his superiority to America whilst wearing a gold medal. It seems tailor made for Angle. The current leading hypothesis is that Rusev is destined for a ‘Mania showdown with Cena. That would work and work well, but the ultra-patriotic Angle would be just as good a fit, if not a better one.

At this point I should probably pause and acknowledge the fact that it doesn’t look like Angle will ever return to WWE for a match. He’s said he’ll wrestle one more year part-time and then retire. WWE are said to be sceptical about Angle’s ability to pass their health and endurance tests, and they’re almost certainly right to be. Angle was originally let go by WWE in 2006 because of health concerns and he’s visibly smaller now than he was then. As much as it would be great to see him return for one final run and matches against Rollins, Ambrose, Cesaro, Ziggler and Rusev (and basically everyone else on the roster) it doesn’t look as though it will happen. I suspect we won’t be seeing Angle back in WWE until he’s called it quits on his in-ring offerings and is ready to accept a (much deserved) spot in the company’s Hall of Fame.

The same isn’t necessarily true for Angle’s fellow TNA alums Bully Ray and Devon. The former Dudley Boyz have apparently cut ties with TNA and agreed to some sort of deal which will see them wrestle at New Japan’s Wrestle Kingdom 9. It seems safe to assume Team 3D were added because the pay-per-view will be broadcast on PPV in the US (via Jeff Jarrett’s increasingly shady Global Force Wrestling “promotion”) and Bully and Devon are considered big enough names to help attract an audience.

While they’re far from being the biggest names in wrestling ever they are a known quantity. They have the Attitude Era rub that could attract lapsed fans and a very long list of accomplishments for longer term fans. I don’t personally feel that they are but I could understand an argument being made for them being the best tag team ever.

All of which could be used to argue in favour of bringing them into WWE on a part-time basis. Or it could if WWE had a healthier doubles division. I’m sure that the Dudleys versus Goldust and Stardust or the Usos would be good, but neither of the current WWE teams has the status of the Dudleys. To make the most of rehiring the Dudleys WWE would need a team (preferably several) with some history and status to pit them against. They’d need that Dream Match™ scenario, allowing the Dudleys to give the rub to a younger team. The only duo WWE has right now that look like they have the potential to become a significant team is The Ascension, and they’re still in developmental.

If WWE wanted to they could hire Bully and Devon as agents and use them as an occasional treat for house shows crowds. If they spent the time between WrestleManias 31 and 32 creating an interesting and worthwhile doubles division with The Ascension as the undisputed stars then a Dudleys match in 2016 could mean something. But we all know this isn’t something WWE will bother with.

Finally we come to the man whom I think would prove the most lucrative name on this list were he to return to the ring: ‘Stone Cold’ Steve Austin. He seems fine with his retirement, having publically exhibited no burning desire to have one final match. It’s completely understandable. He went out in an extremely satisfying match in the semi-main event spot of a WrestleMania, losing to one of his greatest rivals, and friends, at a WrestleMania. He faced everyone there was to face during his time and became a massive star doing so. It’s hard to imagine him having any regrets about his career accomplishments or his last match in particular. While he’s always been careful to avoid committing to anything he has said that he’d come back for the right opponent and the right scenario. But I think another match with Austin is unlikely.

But that’s not to say there aren’t options for him. Because there are. There are tonnes. Austin against Ambrose, Rollins, Ziggler, or Cesaro. He has spoken highly of all of them in interviews and on his podcast, which indicates that he’d work a competitive match with them. Austin v Bryan could be a very good match too, although there you’d have the thorny issue of Bryan having to play the heel. Any of the four guys above could be switched to the antagonist role for an outing against Austin, but for several years now a defining attribute of Bryan’s character has been that he’s the chosen one of fans. He’s the man we want to see on top and the man we want to cheer for.

Even less likely than any of those matches is Austin versus CM Punk. It’s a match that WWE teased in a backstage segment on the 27 June 2011 on the episode of RAW that ended with Punk’s celebrated “pipe bomb”. The appeal of the match is obvious: they’re characters that have both a lot in common and some very clear differences. Each elevated their status within the company as outspoken anti-heroes railing against the management system. Each won several WWE championships and became credible headline talents. It’s the specifics where they differ. Austin was the beer-guzzling redneck who would attack anyone over anything. Punk doesn’t touch alcohol and was never booked to be as aggressive a presence as ‘The Rattlesnake’. The promos and interactions the pair could have in the build-up to a WrestleMania match would be sensational. With both men healthy and capable of hitting their signature spots a match would almost certainly be well-received. 

The match that never was.

Then there’s Austin versus Brock Lesnar. The promos there would have a different feel to them because it would be Austin dealing with Paul Heyman. There’s a lot that could be brought up there without even mentioning Lesnar: Heyman managing Austin early on in his career, giving him the opportunity to do a rough cut of the ‘Stone Cold’ character in ECW in 1995, and their time together in the Alliance. Then of course there’d be the history between Lesnar and Austin. The Texan famously walked out on WWE in 2002 after he was told he was to lose to ‘The Next Big Thing’ on an episode of RAW with no build-up. Heyman could spin that as Austin being scared of Lesnar and go on to talk up Lesnar various shoot credentials and WWE accomplishments to add validity to his claim. There are a lot of topics that could be covered to create a very tense, very real atmosphere for the bout.

Would it happen? I don’t think it would. While Austin would probably be more willing to risk injury than Batista and The Rock because he’s not got as many acting commitments or opportunities he does have a more serious medical history than either man (which, were it to happen, could be another topic for Heyman). Austin’s neck and knees would take a pounding in a match with ‘The Beast’ and I don’t think it would be worth the risk to his health.

Austin versus Hogan is another match with a very obvious appeal to it but I don’t think it could ever happen. ‘The Hulkster’ would need an opponent who could carry him, and that wouldn’t necessarily by Austin after twelve-plus years away from the ring. Then, of course, there’d be the question of winning. Can you imagine either man agreeing to lie down for the other? I can’t. And in this day and age anything less than a clear winner would not go down well.

There’s also John Cena. He’s already faced The Rock twice, losing once and winning once. Their matches were not received well and it’s tough to see things being any different in a Cena v Austin match. Rock actually seemed like a better fit for the Cena character as he was always a little more family-friendly than Austin, and Cena’s always about being family friendly. Something about their characters just made the pairing a natural fit, just as Austin and Punk would fit well together.

Were the match to happen Cena would obviously find himself booed. Austin, more than anyone else from the late 90s and early 00s, embodies the spirit of the Attitude Era. He was the man that sparked that movement within the company. It would be tough to see the match outside of the frame of Attitude versus PG and that’s a scenario WWE should want to keep Cena away from at all costs. The match would probably be as good if not better than Cena’s collisions with The Rock but that’s not really saying much.

Were Austin to return for a match there’s one match I’d want to see more than any other. It’s a match that has never happened but was once advertised as a pay-per-view main event: Austin v Triple H v The Rock. A triple threat match between the three biggest stars of the Attitude Era.

The match was originally advertised as the main event of Survivor Series 1999, a lovely bit of deliberate false advertising by the WWF because they knew from the start that it would never take place. Early on in the show Austin was “run over” in a car park to write him out of the match and storylines, allowing him to head off for a neck surgery. He was replaced by Big Show, who left as the new WWF champion.

Even back then I don’t think the match would have been incredible but it would probably have been very good. But it’s a bout that goes beyond concerns over quality. It’s appeal lies in seeing the three biggest stars of a generation together at the same time. And of course in seeing who’d be booked to go over. Had it happened in ’99 with all three men healthy it would have been hard to call. There were reasons for each man to win: Austin had been the company’s leading man for over a year and a half, The Rock was set to step up and become just as big a star, and Triple H was the era’s lead heel who always found a way to escape with the title. If it were to happen now none of that would be a factor. Times have changed and each man has a Hall of Fame career behind him. But it would still be one of the hardest matches to predict a winner for. And I think it would be an incredibly satisfying watch.

Unforgiven 2008 review

Ahead of the WWE Network’s British release on Wednesday I thought I’d get into the spirit of things by watching and reviewing an old WWE pay-per-view. I selected Unforgiven 2008 for two reasons. One, I remembered it being a pretty sloppy show. Two, I found a DVD of it in a cupboard. I didn’t (and still don’t) remember buying it or being given it so I took it as a sign that it was the right thing to watch.

All set? Let’s begin…

 

 

Opening video

Before getting started it should probably be pointed out that Unforgiven 2008 was built around a new kind of gimmick match. Vince McMahon, so the story goes, felt that the company had become complacent with regard to creating exciting new gimmick matches. It had been twenty years since the Royal Rumble had been created, eleven since the first ever Hell in a Cell, and six since the inaugural Elimination Chamber. Vince wanted a new toy, dammit!

The creative team, and probably a fair number of agents and senior wrestlers, went away to see what could be dreamed up. They returned with a match that was part Royal Rumble, part five-way dance (because those are always popular), and part Elimination Chamber (a gimmick match which is itself a collection of various other matches). Two men would start. Another would join them every five minutes. There would be a five minute period at the end. Guys could pin and submit one another throughout, with anyone doing so becoming the “current” champion. Whoever was the “current” champion once the twenty minute time limit expired would be recognised as the official champion.

They called it… the Scramble.

 

 

It had its good points, in theory. It would allow numerous title change pops in one match without actually having the title change hands, protecting the prestige of the prize while still getting the audience to pop. It could, with a bit of thought, tell a story you couldn’t in many other matches. We’d get a couple of examples of that. It also gave guys outside of the main event the chance to look more competitive than usual, although in practice the one real attempt at that made just didn’t work.

In practice the concept was a shambles. As we’ll see below. All you need to know at this point is that this show was built around this convoluted new gimmick match and the intense feud between Shawn Michaels and Chris Jericho. Again, more on that below. The opening video concentrated on these two things, though mostly the latter. Amusingly it began with the words “Tonight is the first ever championship Scramble." There hasn’t been another since.

ECW championship Scramble

In the arena we were greeted by the strains of Motörhead. Todd Grisham and Matt Striker welcomed us to the show, immediately confirming to me that I’d made the right choice in my search for a disappointing pay-per-view. Tony Chimel announced the ECW Scramble and then Matt Hardy came out.

Matt was still fairly over at this point, although that perception was helped at least in part by a healthy application of the Crowd Roar Noise Machine™ what with this being a DVD. Striker informed us that there was an eighty per cent chance of a new champ being crowned in each Scramble. Because if there’s one thing Striker loves it’s maths! Apparently experience, health and other things used to measure form don’t factor into WWE. Everyone has a fifty-fifty chance of winning any given singles match, no matter who they are or what they and their opponent have accomplished.

As Striker ran through the rules (winding himself in the process). The Miz came out as entrant two. This was trilby hat, fingerless gloves era Miz. A Miz who wore a bandana underneath his hat because that’s what the cool kids do. He’s not great in the ring in 2014, but he is considerably better than he was back in 2008. Seeing that he was involved in this match was not a good sign.

The opening five minutes featured basic exchanges with a strong focus on headlocks. The crowd were into that for some reason. Perhaps Cleveland is a big headlock town. Or maybe Matt Hardy was so popular in the early autumn of 2008 that people went crazy for him doing anything, even a headlock.

Chavo's impressed. And Chavo is not easy to impress.

Chavo entered third, wearing a poncho which he immediately handed over to Bam Neely. Yeah, Bam Neely. I’d completely forgotten his existence too. He was Chavo’s henchman for a couple of months before getting released or demoted to Deep South or something. He was so dull he’d make Justin Gabriel look full of charisma. This was the calibre of performer then head of talent relations John Laurinaitis went for. It’s no wonder WWE was so uninspiring for so long.

Continuing the obscure seconds theme Mark Henry waddled out with Tony Atlas. I am not the biggest fan of Mark Henry but at this point I was actually pretty pleased to see him. It felt like a legitimate star had arrived, although I wouldn’t have thought that when this first aired. Henners was still a year and a half away from opening his Hall of Pain.

Henry, the reigning champion, quickly pinned Chavo off a World’s Strongest Slam to become the “current” champion. This brings us to the first problem of the Scramble gimmick. Any reigning champion is a current champion. That they chose that as the term to denote the man currently on track to win was confusing and didn’t convey that the man in question wasn’t the official champ until the final bell. Interim champion would have been better. Anything would have been better!

While we’re at it I’ll mention the second trouble with the format: the audience seemed unclear on whether the title was changing hands or not. While I could be wrong on that it seems like the safest way of explaining their tepid reaction to some of the results throughout the night. The rules weren’t indecipherable but any gimmick match with as many stipulations as this is probably not going to do well.

Henry slowed things down so everyone could catch their breath. After Striker had described him as "the strongest... human being... on... the... planet” Finlay came out as final entrant. He was a wildly over babyface with jaunty panpipes for music. Hornswoggle was with him. I’d completely forgotten this era of Finlay’s career, which would include him doing jigs with Hornswoggle in the ring on a semi-regular basis, and didn’t appreciate being reminded of it. Finlay was over, which speaks volumes about roster depth at this time.

Hornswoggle distracted Henry and the referee, allowing ‘The Belfast Bruiser’ to sneak his shillelagh out of the corner and smack Henry in the head with it. Then, in the most confusing spot of the night, Finlay and Hardy teamed up to throw Henry over the top rope, as though they were in a battle royal. Striker and Grisham, being a pair of stone cold pros, didn’t even acknowledge that.

Finlay immediately hit the Celtic Cross on Hardy, pinning him to become the “current” champ. Hardy recovered fairly quickly and hit a Twist of Fate on Miz to take the title for himself. The final two and a half minutes were an omnishambles of moves, pin attempts and breakups. The match ended with everyone but Miz (he was busy lying at ringside with a nasty hard way gash on his face) piling on top of each other writhing around in one of the most shambolic displays I’ve ever seen in a wrestling ring.

Your winner and new ECW-but-not-really-actual-ECW champion Matt Hardy.

Striker talked about Hardy climbing the cliffs of Dover and standing at the apex as the champion. Stuff like that is why Striker was fired. Thankfully he would not appear on this show again.

Backstage segment one

New champ Matt hugged his brother Jeff, who was at this point the most popular man in wrestling about to embark on a quest to win the WWE championship. Matt said he wanted a Hardys clean sweep and declared it the greatest night of his life. I wonder if he even remembers this show now.

A split screen showed WWE champion Triple H and World Heavyweight champion CM Punk in corridors preparing for their respective title defences. Both had long hair. It was weird.

Question time fun with Jim Ross

Back at ringside Tazz and JR introduced themselves and rambled about the show a little. JR asked whether SmackDown GM Vickie Guerrero should have let Big Show compete in the WWE title Scramble match and told viewers they could vote on their answer on the WWE website. No Twitter here. Presumably there was some controversial aspect to this topic. Whatever it was it wasn't made clear.

And then... "Yo yo yo yo! Shad Gaspard and JTG, it's Cryme Time! Brooklyn, Brooklyn!"

Tag team championship: Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase v Cryme Tyme

Yes! Everyone’s illiterate gangsta thug wrestlers were on this show! Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler were both massively excited by this entrance. I felt nauseous. Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes came out to face them. This was blue boots with the Triforce on them era Cody Rhodes. He also had trunks with 'The Prince of Pro Wrestling' scrawled on the back. That nickname should have caught on.

Cryme Tyme were more over than I remembered and had more double team spots too. With a better gimmick, better timing, and an understanding that speaking out against the way you’re booked doesn’t help your standing if you’re a guy in WWE’s mid-card, they could have gotten somewhere.  

Dripping with charisma...

The match was decent. Cody and Ted cheated to isolate JTG. Shad came in fired up off a hot tag and threw his foes around like a hoss. The Legacy lads thwarted a double team move which looked like it may have been More Bang For Your Buck (it definitely wouldn’t have been) then Ted flipped a small package from JTG over, giving Cody the win.

After the match the debuting Manu ran in to save Cody and Ted from a post-match beating from Cryme Tyme. Cole described him as a "mysterious violent stranger.” This was about as good as it got for Manu. He was chastised on-screen and off- by Randy Orton for being lazy and having a bad attitude. You know you’re in trouble when Orton’s knocking you for being unmotivated. He was released in February of 2009 having accomplished nothing of note.

Backstage segment two

A doctor told Shawn Michaels that he would risk making his injured tendon worse by competing. Michaels didn’t reply. We’d find out what the silence and disregard for safety was about in a video recap.

At this point the Michaels and Jericho dispute had been going on for around six months. It had started when Michaels super kicked his friend and mentor Ric Flair into retirement at WrestleMania XXIV. Batista, another friend and student of Flair’s, took issue with Michaels retiring ‘Naitch’ and challenged him to a match. Jericho offered his services as a guest referee for that match, which HBK won by faking a knee injury.

Batista moved on to other things after that, leaving ‘Y2J’ to take Michaels to task for cheating. Even though Michaels had cheated in a face versus face match he was seen as the good guy in this scenario, with Jericho as the villain. The pair had a match at The Great American Bash during which Michaels received a cut near his eye which Jericho targeted, giving him the edge and allowing him to win the match.

Michaels announced his doctor had advised him to retire, so serious was the eye injury. During his farewell speech he knocked Jericho, saying that he’d never achieve the success ‘The Showstopper’ had. This led to a meeting where Jericho verbally laid into Michaels and accidentally struck his wife. Because he exhibited no signs of remorse for this accidentally blow Michaels announced his plans to remain an active wrestler so that he could take on Jericho in a non-sanctioned street fight to gain retribution for his family.

Non-sanctioned match: Shawn Michaels v Chris Jericho

This match is the saving grace of this entire show. It’s the only match on it that’s worth watching. While the latter two Scramble bouts did some interesting things and featured some memorable moments this is the only match that is good from start to finish. Without this on the show it would have been far closer to train wreck levels than it is.

Lilian Garcia kicked things off with a reminder that both combatants had signed paperwork that ensured they could not hold each other or WWE responsible for what would happen in the match. Michaels immediately got a takedown on Jericho and then lamped him with his boot. They went out into the crowd and round ringside before Jericho floored Michaels with a DDT, introducing a chair to the match and setting up a table outside the ring.

Michaels escaped a suplex through table and choked Jericho. He stopped a Sweet Chin Music attempt because he wanted to hurt ‘The Highlight of the Night’ more, sinking in a Crippler crossface to do just that. Cole understandably didn’t name it, the Benoit incident having taken place just a year before. Jericho staggered to his feet and sent Michaels head first into a chair.

Jericho fired off jabs at Michaels’ injured eye before applying the Walls of Jericho. With no rope breaks in an unsanctioned fight Michaels had to use a technical counter to escape: a fire extinguisher to the face.



He learnt that from Jose.

Jericho’s protégé Lance Cade showed up to interfere for a bit, eventually getting wiped out with Sweet Chin Music. Michaels then smashed Jericho with a chair, sending off the top rope through the table standing at ringside. He followed that up by draping him on an announce desk (he was spoilt for choice with three at ringside) and elbow dropping him through it. Jericho got back into the ring (because wrestling) and Michaels whipped him with his belt (because southern justice). ‘King’ chose this point to suggest Michaels may have been possessed by the devil. His sense of timing never fails.

Michaels trapped Jericho in an armbar and pummelled his eye, retribution for Jericho’s unsportsmanlike attacks. With Jericho unconscious the referee stopped the match and awarded the victory to Michaels.

Jericho did a great job of selling unconsciousness. Michaels pummelled him more after the decision.  The ref yanked him off (to stop Jericho getting hurt) and got a super kick for his trouble. More officials showed up (including Mike Chioda) to protect Jericho as he was taken backstage. The segment ended with Michael Cole wandering aloud if God would ever forgive Michaels for what he’d done.

Backstage segment three

Cody, Ted and Manu were joined by Legacy boss Randy Orton. At this point in time the group was having problems, although my memory of the group is that it was always having problems and never really felt like the cohesive, Evolution 2.0 it was probably meant to. Cody formally introduced Manu, telling Orty that the new boy recognised and respected talent when he saw it.

Manu piped up at that point, revealing another reason he would ultimately be released: he is not a natural at wrestling speak. He told Orton that Cody ‘n’ Ted were in a different class in the most bland, hollow, passionless voice imaginable. He said the words because he was scripted too, not because he believed them. Fair enough, he didn’t believe them, but he should have tried to make viewers feel like he did.  

Orton cut a promo memorable only for its abundance of shoulder movements. He rambled a bit but seemed to feel the lads had gotten lucky. It ended with him saying he wasn’t impressed with them. At all. Over at the commentary desk JR said Cody and Ted didn't want to hear that. Then Tazz put over Motörhead and JR asked his Big Show question again.

WWE championship Scramble

The second championship Scramble is remembered for one thing: ‘The’ Brian Kendrick pinning Jeff Hardy with Sliced Bread Number Two to become the “current” champ. It was the sort of surprise this match was probably designed to incorporate. Ultimately it was nothing more than a token shock that accomplished nothing.

What this match should be remembered for is its final five minutes. It marked the beginning of a friendly rivalry (by which I mean a face versus face rivalry) between ascending babyface superhope Jeff Hardy and WWE champion Triple H. Entering last ‘The Game’ quickly pinned Kendrick to keep his title reign on track but Hardy would become the “current” champion by pinning MVP with a Twist of Fate. They exchanged the lead a few more times and although Triple H ended the bout still the champion Jeff Hardy was just seconds way from pinning Shelton Benjamin at the final bell.

It was a story that could only be told as effectively in a match like this. Hardy and Helmsley were shown to be on a similar level, essentially trading the title back and forth, desperately trying to retain the upper hand until the time limit expired. It could have gone to either of them. A good feud in which Hardy would win his one and only WWE championship would come out of this. Sadly the rest of the match dragged and Kendrick, MVP and Benjamin were made to look like the enhancement guys they clearly were, with Kendrick and MVP taking a cumulative six losses between them.

Backstage segment four

In the back Todd Grisham asked Michaels how he was feeling. That was a slap in the face to the Brand Extension: Grisham was supposed to be an ECW guy! Michaels said it was the first PPV in three months which hadn’t resulted in him being hospitalised. He said he was going home to his wife and kids, content but not satisfied and with no sense of closure. The worst, he said, was still to come for Jericho.

The location of his smile was not touched upon.

Somewhere else in the building Eve Torres (here just an interviewer) channelled Matt Striker and reminded WHC CM Punk that the odds were against him successfully retaining his belt. Punk started the standard life of adversity promo before Orton showed up and called him a fluke champion. DiBiase, Rhodes and Manu then attacked Punk, roughing him up and throwing him against a plastic container. Kofi Kingston (who at this point still had the potential to become a somebody) tried helping Punk out but didn’t get far. Orton gave Punk a Punt kick and told his cronies that was how to make an impression.

There’s a more relevant point to discuss this segment below…

Divas championship: Maryse v Michelle McCool

I’d love to say that they surprised me and had a great match, but they didn’t. It was Maryse and Michelle McCool. Did you really expect anything else?

Promo segment spectacular

JR revealed that seventy seven per cent of viewers felt Vickie Guerrero had made the right decision not allowing Big Show to compete the WWE title match. Once again they provided no context for why this question was being asked. Looking into it I’ve found out that Show had interfered in a qualifying match for the Scramble and had been generally disrespectful to heel GM Vickie. It was also very clearly designed to play into what would happen between the two minutes later.

And then he appeared: Mike Adamle. Dim-witted, wooden, vacant, clueless Mike Adamle.

He didn’t really do enough to warrant me going into much detail on him here but it was a pleasure to see him fumbling his way through a promo he probably didn’t understand. Basically he was there to announce that CM Punk might not compete. With any other babyface that would be the setup for them making a gutsy comeback in their scheduled defence. That wouldn’t be the case here. But again, I’ll get to that. Adamle said if Punk couldn’t compete he’d find a suitable replacement.

Adamle left and Big Show came out. Full-on babyface Big Show, high-fiving, waving and smiling. He volunteered his services for Punk’s vacant spot and then awkwardly plugged the SmackDown Your Vote campaign (something that was done to help ease the McMahon name into the political sphere ahead of Linda’s failed attempts at getting elected). Vickie came out and had a go at him for disobeying her instructions.

Then The Undertaker’s druids came out. Dimmed lights, hooded robes, smoke machine, eerie music, the whole deal. Show loled it up, literally holding his sides because he found it so funny that Vickie was going to finally be caught by The Undertaker. A gross oversimplification: ‘The Dead Man’ wanted revenge on Vickie for costing him the World Heavyweight championship and using him as a weapon against her ex-boyfriend Edge.

All this was done so we could get to this thrilling piece of work at No Mercy.

The druids parked a casket at ringside and ‘Taker appeared on the Titantron, telling Vickie to get in. She didn’t so he came out to ringside to get her, Big Show happily holding her in place to stop her escaping. When ‘Big Evil’ arrived in the ring Show swerve turned on him, giving him a big ol' right punch to the face. Show smacked Undertaker around for a few minutes before giving him a second KO punch. Then he held 'The Dead Man' up for Vickie to slap him.

No context was provided throughout any of this. It was just stuff that happened.

Backstage segment five

William Regal and Mike Adamle had a chat about Punk's status for the World title match (which was next). Regal wanted in on the action and reminded Adamle he’d pinned Punk to become the 2008 King of the Ring. Adamle made his excuses and left.

World Heavyweight championship Scramble

The future Drax the Destroyer and John Bradshaw Layfield started the main event. That may sound alarming but they actually had a pretty enjoyable five minutes together, the highlight of which was Batista using a figure four (because it looked so strange to see him do it). Batista was massively over as a face. JBL was well established as a heel. His limo entrance was still a thing and helped him come across as a big deal. Unfortunately there was no hot stepping from him. I was gutted at that.

Bald headed evil Kane was third. JBL had been wiped out by a collision with the ring steps, so we were treated to Kane and 'The Animal' for several minutes. He got back into the match just in time to break up a Batista bomb and get pinned after a choke slam. Yes, Kane became the “current” champion.

Kane thinking he's flying. Mysterio's hair mask. There's so much going on here.

Rey Mysterio was the fourth man introduced, wearing a mask with a thoroughly ridiculous Mohawk headpiece attached to it. This could well be where my problems with Rey started. Broadly speaking it was Kane and Layfield v Mysterio and Batista during this portion. The faces busted out some double team moves. Rey cheekily rolled Batista up from atop his shoulders and the two had a few heated words but JBL thumped them before they could come up blows.

Entrant number five’s time arrived and CM Punk did not come out. Instead it was Chris Jericho who got the spot. Yes, the same Chris Jericho who’d been beaten and left unconscious by a vengeful Shawn Michaels earlier in the night. He was clearly in a bad way but he had been deemed fit and healthy enough to compete in a second match. Meanwhile Punk had been on the receiving end of a generic backstage tussle and blasted with Orton’s Punk kick. True, the Punt has been built up as a particularly devastating move since this show but even so it didn’t seem like much to take out a world champion, especially when compared to what Jericho had been through.

At the time this move was interpreted as a burial of Punk. I can see why people would think that but looking at the bigger picture I don’t think that was the case. Rightly or wrongly Punk had been portrayed as a man who’d broken into the main event a little too early and had found himself out of his depth. He would regain the WHC in 2009 and be presented in a far better light. His falling to a single Punt was one aspect of the story being told at the time rather than a single incident designed to make him look bad. It’s also obvious with hindsight that the World title was transferred onto Jericho to freshen up RAW’s title scene and boost the status of his feud with Michaels.

Punk being written out of this match was bad. But it was at least done for a reason.

Come on, baby!

The closing moments of the match were very good. Batista escaped a choke slam attempt and floored ‘The Big Red Machine’ with a spinebuster. Mysterio sprung into the ring and tried a hurricanrana on Batista but Batista countered it into a Batista bomb. With the clock ticking down ‘The Animal’ made the pin… just a little too late and seconds after Jericho had snuck into the ring and pinned Kane. The final klaxon rang out and Batista was left to despairingly sink his head into his hands as ‘Y2J’ was awarded the championship.

It was another example of how the Scramble format could be used for interesting storytelling. But it was also the last example. In one night WWE did everything they were realistically going to with the Scramble match. Which is why we haven’t seen one since.

Final thoughts

This was a shambles of a show that benefited greatly from hosting one of the most memorable encounters of the Jericho v Michaels feud. Without that it would have been awful. The Scramble match concept was flawed and presented poorly. Although it is something I think could work somewhere like Ring of Honor or if WWE had a deeper mid-card and were willing to put the time in constructing a five way feud for the IC title.

The show would have been better had they been scrapped entirely. Triple H and Jeff Hardy could have had a singles match. Benjamin, Kendrick and MVP could have had a three-way for Benjamin’s US title. Mark Henry could have had a weapons-laden brawl with Matt Hardy. The only thing they would have lost by swapping the Scramble matches around was Jericho’s surprise title win, and they still could have found a way to get to that if it was what they wanted.

There are worse shows out there. But none of them have the Scramble match to offer. And for that we should probably be thankful.

Another Conversation With Dan Pryce

Last December I adapted a lengthy exchange left on a Facebook comment into a blog post (read it here). It was between myself and Dan Pryce. People who pay too much attention to this blog may remember Dan being referenced before and since that conversation-cum-blog post but it remains his sole contribution.

I thought it would be nice to change that. Because Dan’s a naturally funny and smart guy and it comes across surprisingly well in text (perhaps it helps if you know him, I’m not sure). Facebook conversations about wrestling between he and I are pretty frequent but it’s rare for them to rival the length and all-encompassing nonsense of the previous conversation post.

But there was one from the beginning of August that was mostly focused on the SummerSlam main event and what will follow it. As I still agree with everything I wrote here I thought it would be sensible to post this instead of retyping it all in a more traditional style. For the record Dan actually started the conversation with “In other news.” I want to clarify that so it’s clear nothing’s been cut out.

So now, for the second time ever, Dan Pryce contributes to That Wrestling Blog…

***

Dan: In other news, would they do Sting-Lesnar? Would they?

Lesnar beating Cena, then Sting dropping from the rafters would be a mark out moment. The resulting match would be drivel.

Dave: They might do the match. The rafters should be out of the question after Owen. I'd rather they went territories: turn out the lights for long enough for Steve to walk to the ring then put them back on. Massive pop and Heyman can sell a heart attack. Everyone wins.

But let me put this to you: would you rather Sting or The Rock make a post-main event SummerSlam cameo?

Dan: Rocky. Just a big stare-down. Though I'm pretty sure they're keeping Lesnar for Reigns. Or the returning Bryan. Though Bryan may never return. I don't think Reigns will be ready, even by WrestleMania. So The Rock. That was a roundabout way of getting to the same conclusion.

Dave: I think they're definitely saving Lesnar for Reigns. Doesn't mean they can't give him Sting or Rocky to go over at NOC or the Rumble. Something about the stretch of shows from October to December makes me feel they're beneath Rock and even Sting, who I've never understood the appeal of.

I've no interest in Sting v Lesnar if it happens. In fact I think I’d actively be against it. There's no reason for it to happen. They're not the sort of names who get tossed into the same "dream match" scenarios. And it would be awful.

On a related note I could see Lesnar sitting out Survivors to save his dates and a ten man tag headlining instead.

Dan: I'd like that. He'll defend against Cena at NOC, in a rematch. Because: who else? Batista return? Possible? Imminent?

Dave: Actually I think Batista's a likely candidate for a post-SummerSlam main event cameo. Or a return on the following night's RAW.

Dan: I'd like an Authority versus everybody else tag match. They haven't done one yet. Survivor Series would be the best place to hold it. You could have a team led by Aitch and a team led by Reigns. Some kind of ridiculous stipulation involving title rights or company control or some such. I always used to enjoy that. Putting your company up casually in a match.

Dave: Vince was crazy about defending the company in matches. Why did the board stand for it?!

Survivor match pitting Team Reigns v The Authority would be excellent. They could do some interesting things with teammates turning on teammates to set things up for future feuds. Triple H, Orton, Batista, Kane and Rollins versus Reigns, Ambrose, and three others. The three others bit is where things fall down. They don't have a deep enough roster.

It'd probably be the Usos, which makes me want to weep.

Dan: Why they never do this anymore befuddles me. They could use Survivor Series to set up big Royal Rumble feuds to set up big 'Mania feuds. But there's no progression. Remember progression?

Dave: I do. Vince doesn't.

Dan: Stardust. Titus O'Gator. And Alicia Fox. That’s a team!

Dave: In fact, Wyatt could be face by then. There's potential in the Wyatt Family, Ambrose and Reigns teaming. Then the December show could have a six man of the Wyatts v Evolution.

Then they could slowly build to Wyatt v Trips at 'Mania.

This is pointless chatter though. Survivor Series will be headlined by Cena v Batista in a Lack of Interest on a Pole match.

Dan: Where is D-Bry? I miss him so.

I still don't miss Punk. I feel nothing about Punk's absence. I realise only that he kind of existed for about 8 months and I watched none of his matches after The Undertaker one.

Dave: Stopping robbers with a broken neck. If this were ECW that would become his chief gimmick. Heyman would be dressing jobbers as fans and having them leap the rail to get their necks snapped during D-Bry matches.

I don't miss Punk either. There was nothing for him to do and I wanted him to take time off. I am looking forward to his hypocritical return in time for a WrestleMania in a few years’ time though.

Dan: I can't think of any matches he could have, even now, that would interest me. His great foil was Cena. He needed Cena, and Cena needed him. They had fantastic matches.

Dave: The only fresh matches are singles ones opposite The Shield guys but none of them interest me, even though I like Regins, Rollins and 'Brose. Even Punk v Wyatt wouldn't do anything for me and I love me some Wyatt.

Punk v Bo would have held my interest before Bo's streak ended.

Dan: I'm excited for Lesnar to get the title, somehow. They should have given it to him earlier. Also, he should have a) beaten Cena in his first match b) never had one match, let alone three, with Hunter c) broken the Streak but tried to make a good match out of it.

Dave: R-Truth ending Bo’s streak is a perfect example of WWE ineptitude.

(At this point I posted a lengthy scenario detailing how Bo’s streak ending could have been a bigger deal. I’ve edited it out of this because it became this blog post. There didn’t seem much point in having it on the blog twice.)

Dave: Lesnar should've been undefeated since 2012. The Streak ending would've had more impact and been easier to accept were that the case.

Dan: That Bo idea would have been excellent. He's such a perfect character for that. I'd like him to start doing self-help videos.

Come to think of it, who will Lesnar face?

Cena. Done.

Triple H. No.

Bryan? Out.

Reigns? Mania is seven months away.

Dave: Orton v Lesnar is fresh, strange considering how long they've both been around. I'm desperate to see a mid-air reversal from an F5 into an RKO.

Bryan will probably be Lesnar’s Rumble challenger.

The other question is who will Reigns face? He needs to be prepared for a 'Mania main event against a former UFC champion and the man who ended The Streak in which the title's on the line. That's a tall order in seven months, and that's with him being pretty good now.

Lesnar v Cesaro is likely. It would have made a lot more sense to keep Heyman with Cesaro, obviously, which is probably why they got split. Nobody in WWE seems compatible with sense.

What we learned from this is that Lesnar's world title reign is going to be awful until its final couple of months. By which point people will have stopped caring.

Good luck, Roman.