NXTweet 09.12.15

One week until Takeover: London. This was all about final bits of build for the key matches. And reminding North American Network subscribers that it's not the end of the world that they can't watch a show live in the evening for once.

Intro

Tweet 1: It's NXTime.

Tweet 2: These emotionally manipulative ads for JEWELLERY on the Network though.
Tweet 3: "Bull Dempsey deserves to be in the opening credits," said nobody ever.

Corey Hollis and John Skyler v Enzo Amore and Big Cass

Tweet 4: Little Enzo and Colin Nash have engaged Serious Mode.

Tweet 5: Corey Hollis and John Skyler are rocking the ECW jobbers look. Good for them.
Tweet 6: Cass been hitting the spray tan, hasn't he? Probs part of his knee rehab.
Tweet 7: Liking Carmella's hair this week FTR.

Fresh knee pads on Li'l 'zo.

Tweet 8: Cena-esque drop kick from Enzo there.
Tweet 9: Story of this match is Cass and Enzo have beaten this jobber team far easier than the tag champs did. Commentary have missed that.
Tweet 10: Food on tables promo here from Enzo. Great stuff.
Tweet 11: Such a fan of Cass waiting awkwardly to hit his catchphrase once Enzo decides he's done.
Tweet 12: "We WILL walk out the NXT tag team champions" - Big Cass, who's probably wrong

Dana Brooke and Emma talk to Tom Philips

Tweet 13: Dana Brooke in a white top? #twothumbsup

Tweet 14: NXT > Japan, says Emma.
Tweet 15: I could believe Emma is a heavy smoker.
Tweet 16: "Scrunch down" - Dana Brooke, with another line I'd be a fan of hearing IRL

Deonna Purrazzo v Asuka

Tweet 17: The Asuka versus Dana and Emma feud isn't the best thing ever but I do like their issue being independent of the women's title.

Tweet 18: I don't like Deonna's chances for this match...
Tweet 19: Not least because she's wearing massive knee pads.

Ask her!

Tweet 20: Going to make the bold prediction that Asuka will debut new ring gear at Takeover: London.
Tweet 21: Oh no! Dana and Emma are standing on the ramp and Asuka is distrac- oh, wait, everything's fine. She just KOed that job girl.

Hype Bros promo

Tweet 22: Imagine Mojo thinking 90s references will get him over with Vince McMahon.

Tweet 23: Things would be very different for them if Russo was still around.

BAMF promo

Tweet 24: 'Fashionplate' Wesley Blake.

Tweet 25: That's a singles run waiting to happen. Give it time...
Tweet 26: Anyone done any fanfic about Alexa's Goa'uld hand thing yet? Asking for a friend.

Hype Bros v BAMF

Tweet 27: Mojo and Ryder are a good fit as partners but you still have to feel for Ryder. Got himself over and this is his reward.

Tweet 28: Liking the Dennis the Menace colour scheme on BAMF.

FFS.

Tweet 29: The physiques on Mojo and Blake though.
Tweet 30: Really enjoying the heel shenanigans of BAMF. Shocking display as Alexa gets lifted up by Blake to kick Ryder in the head.

At least Zack's safe from her rough moonsault.

Tweet 31: Mojo Rawley is a sweaty lad.
Tweet 32: Hoping Blake and Murphy win this. Feel like the Hype Bros will though.
Tweet 33: They won immediately after I pressed send FFS. I get it. Heel tag champs need fave challengers. Still, BAMF deserve better.

Samoa Joe and Baron Corbin promo

Tweet 34: Joe and Barry having a chat here.

Tweet 35: "I don't like where you come from and I don't like what you represent" - Barry Corbin on Apollo Crews
Tweet 36: Barry's gimmick of calling indy guys rookies: tremendous.

Peyton Royce v Bayley

Tweet 37: Peyton Royce getting a featured intro here. Has she won a TV match yet?

Tweet 38: I retract that question as it no longer matters when she's doing Billy Gunn's draped-in-the-ropes pose. Hilarious.
Tweet 39: Billy did it better though. More erotic, for starters...
Tweet 40: Going by boot colours Bayley is the heel and Peyton is the face.
Tweet 41: Bayley doing the Jericho style bulldog always makes me sad.

Peyton loses. Again.

Tweet 42: This Nia Jax and Eva Marie pairing being a lasting thing is a great decision. This heat is manager heat.
Tweet 43: Standing at ringside to get booed. That's how to book Eva Marie.

Apollo Crews and Finn Bálor chat backstage

Tweet 44: Casual chat between Apollo and Finn in front of a camera here.

Tweet 45: #unfinishedbusiness
Tweet 46: I want Finn Bálor to be booked as an increasingly paranoid champion, like Austin in 2001. Doing backstage skits where he sings and that.

Baron Corbin and Samoa Joe v Finn Bálor and Apollo Crews

Tweet 47: Barry and Joe tagging out against their rivals and it being framed as tremendous use of mind games is hilarious.

Tweet 48: Crews v Joe will be a good thing for NXT when it rolls around.
Tweet 49: Barry, you're not even taping your wrists, mate. What have you become?
Tweet 50: If this match ends with Joe choking out Finn then Finn retains next Wednesday.
Tweet 51: Could see Apollo or Barry taking the pin though TBH.
Tweet 52: Barry Corbin should get a new gimmick where he makes reference to being a werewolf every so often.
Tweet 53: Bálor falls to the Coquina clutch. So he'll retain the title. Because that's how WWE works. And NXT, despite what it gets right, is WWE.

The hossiest hoss.

Tweet 54: Joe posing with another man's belt to close the show. #heel
Tweet 55: Good show. Good hustle. Strong stuff.

The Power of Bolief

Bo Dallas's motivational speaker gimmick is similar to the archetypal televangelist. For whatever reason WWE seem unwilling to fully embrace this¹ and instead keep Bo doing the same trite promos that end in his "Bolieve!" catchphrase. Yeah, it's a damn nice pun but Bo could be doing more as a character and livening up the lower card as he does it.

Do you.. Bolieve?

Here's an idea. Have Bo come out dressed in an all white suit, including a white tie and white shoes. They should go full televangelist with it and have him look like he's trying to resemble an actual angel. The New Day lads have honed the televangelist promo style but they're not using the look. That's still wide open and Bo would fit it well.

With this new look could come a new focus in promos. Instead of just setting himself up for his punchline catchphrase Bo could spend a few weeks or a month talking about how he wants to help WWE Superstars™ who are floundering and struggling. Interrupting random matches on SmackDown and getting segments on Main Event would be enough to get this new approach across, with it being made clear that Bo's looking to help lower card lads.

After a few weeks Bo could reveal the guys he wants to help, interrupting a match involving them or simply calling them to the ring during SmackDown (this clearly isn't high profile enough to get air time on RAW). There are a few options for this. Bo could tell Cutis Axel and Damien Sandow that they're better than imitating people from decades ago. He could tell Fandango and Adam Rose that they're both great athletes not being taken seriously because of their silly gimmicks. He could tell Zack Ryder that management aren't interested in him despite his hard work and that he hasn't been relevant for years.

Bolievers?

They're all middle or lower card guys (whether they deserve to be or not). The diea should be that Dallas recruits them to be Bolievers and becomes their manager. Let him manage two guys, give them new all-white ring gear (maybe have their names in black on them or something) and use them as a tag team. You'd have a new team, a new use for Bo Dallas that plays to his strength of being both irritating and ridiculous, and something for guys who are currently directionless.

You would also have the option to imply that Bo is some sort of sinister cult leader who's brainwashed guys into being Bolievers. That may not sound like anything particularly novel in and of itself and it wouldn't be. But it's worth noting that Bo's real life brother is Bray Wyatt, a man well established within WWE canon as a cult leader. Doing something similar with Bo would create the option to play the cult leader thing up in a future storyline. It's an idea that does things short and long term.

But it won't happen. Obviously. Nobody in WWE writes for the mid-card anymore.

***

¹ It's possible they're concerned about upsetting big Christianity fans in their own locker room or religious groups outside the company. But that argument doesn't really tally with them referring to Brock Lesnar as the Devil or the continued depiction of The Undertaker as a demon and-or zombie.

Believe the Hype

So. The Hype Bros. Although they're clearly bit part players in the grand scheme of NXT I think this is an inspired pairing. Zack Ryder and Mojo Rawley. A reality show-modelled "broski" and a guy who bangs on about hype. That feels right. That works.

It's nice on several levels. We're seeing 'Long Island Iced Z' finally getting something to do, years after he managed to get himself over and WWE frittered his popularity away to enhance Kane for a feud with Cena (got to keep Kane strong!). Technically, yes, it's a demotion but it's not like Ryder was doing anything on the main roster. It's years since he was involved in any form of noteworthy storyline and months since he lost to Cena in the US open challenge, his last meaningful match.

Dick to the mouth finish there. Strong.

It's nice for Mojo. Because he may actually get over this way. His kids' TV-like ever-hyped demeanour grated on the Full Sail fairly early into his initial singles run last year. Pairing him with the genuinely popular (and relatively likeable) Ryder, smartly positioning him as a guy Ryder's chosen to take under his wing, gets Mojo screen time but keeps him in a role where his hyperactivity can be a strength: Ryder can get worked over and Mojo can rally the crowd.

That they've been made a tag team is good for the doubles scene as a whole. For a while there there were only two teams in NXT: Enzo Amore and Big Cass's New Age Tribute Act and Blake and Murphy's Dubstep Cowboys. The Vaudevillains were excused were excused from TV duties for an extended period and every other team either got main rostered or were split. The Hype Bros give NXT a much needed fresh duo.

The obvious thing to expect is a heel turn from Mojo. I don't think that will be the initial plan though. King of NXT Triple H seems to want Mojo to work out as a face, hence why he was pulled once he started getting booed and has been retooled for his redebut. I suspect a heel turn on Ryder may be a backup plan but we won't see it unless the Hype Bros fail to work out. Which I don't think they will. NXT is the WWE show where they know how to present stories and characters for a modern audience. If they really want Mojo cheered they're going to find out how to make it happen.

NXTweet 24.06.15

Finn Bálor versus Rhyno with Kevin Owens on commentary? That's how you main event a wrestling show! And as far as undercards go? The debut of the Hype Bros is bad, but in a good way.

Hideo Itami promo, featuring Kevin Owens,  Finn Bálor and Rhyno

Tweet 1: Right then, you mugs. Let's watch NXT.

Tweet 2: Oh look, it's Hideo Itami and his broken arm.
Tweet 3: Disappointed he's not wearing one of those light-selling-duty casts Triple H wore that time Lesnar broke his arm.
Tweet 4: This Greg Hamilton lad is such a black hole of meaning.
Tweet 5: "NXT is very popular in Japan" - Hideo Itami, doing his duty
Tweet 6: Owens walks out. People cheer. His music cuts. Some lads boo. Great stuff.
Tweet 7: Enjoying Itami trying not to laugh at Owens' promo.
Tweet 8: It will eventually be revealed that Itami was taken out by Rikishi, who (obviously) did it for The Rock.

They fought.

Tweet 9: Hey, don't forget that Bálor and Owens are feuding too! That's what this booking is about y'know.
Tweet 10: Digging Rhyno's pink and black singlet.
Tweet 11: Rare instance of the NXT main event being booked after the show's started.

Enzo Amore and Big Cass v Sylvester LeFort and Jason Jordan

Tweet 12: Take it as read that I'm rolling my eyes at Carmella's "Bye, Felicia" T-shirt.

Tweet 13: SLY LEFORT IS BACK!!
Tweet 14: LeFort and Jordan will lose. Which is fine. It frees LeFort up to work as an inept manager again.

Revival of the hottest feud of 2014...

Tweet 15: LeFort's outfit is the perfect level of ridiculous. Good on 'im.
Tweet 16: 'The New Double J' might want to invest in a better fitting singlet.
Tweet 17: Isn't the obvious thing for Jason Jordan to do to just become a singles wrestler? If you've not got a tag partner don't be a tag team, mate.

Devin Taylor talks to Samoa Joe

Tweet 18: Samoa Joe promo. Samoa Joemo. He's getting WELL shouty.

Tweet 19: Joe wants to fight. That's the message there. Good on yer, Joe lad.

Dana Brooke v Cassie

Tweet 20: Dana Brooke's ridiculously convoluted pose sequence, now with added gloves.

Tweet 21: Cassie, the latest female wrestler to hit WWE with no surname.
Tweet 22: Dana getting New Day clap heat here. You know you're doing a good job with you hear that.
Tweet 23: I wish Dana's finish was being called the One Night Stand. It would make Alex Shane so proud.

If not One Night Stand then maybe Ode to 'The Showstealer'?

Tweet 24: Charlotte promos need more jackets being taken off and elbow dropped. Maybe some shoes being thrown.
Tweet 25: Lol at the next special being called Beast from the East.

Finn Bálor video

Tweet 26: Finn Bálor there. Big fan of LEGO and banter.

Tweet 27: I hope we get a vignette where Owens breaks into Bálor's house and smashes all his LEGO builds. That would get so much heat.
Tweet 28: "... and Matt Bloom is at the back of the bus" - Fergal Devitt absolutely DESTROYING kayfabe
Tweet 29: This video is basically Triple H confirming that he's a New Japan mark.
Tweet 30: Massive fan of seeing TAKA Michinoku, the man who doesn't age.
Tweet 31: I'm genuinely surprised they're showing Bullet Club merch here.
Tweet 32: Good video, that. Interested in what they have lined up for part three.

Bull Dempsey is shown slobbing about in various places

Tweet 33: Has Bull Dempsey had a heart attack? Is that the gimmick now?

Tweet 34: Such a fan of this out of shape slob gimmick though. They're sending you a message, Bull mate.

Hype Bros v Angelo Dawkins and Sawyer Fulton

Tweet 35: Mojo Rawley and Zack Ryder. The Hype Bros. This is a thing is it? This is happening?

These lads stay hyped.

Tweet 36: Facing my favourite NXT tag team, Fulton and Dawkins. Fan of these lads on so many levels.
Tweet 37: If Mojo was serious about getting over he'd still be wearing the neon green trunks. They were money.
Tweet 38: I miss Fulton's ear guard thing.
Tweet 39: Big fan of WGTT 2.0 using that WGTT double team. Sickened that nobody on commentary referenced it.
Tweet 40: The Hype Bros win with an elevated cock to the mouth. That's wrestling, that is!

William Regal and Eva Marie talk about Eva Marie having a bit of a wrestle at some point

Tweet 41: #Regalpop

Tweet 42: #EvaMariepop
Tweet 43: Actually I don't think Eva Marie's as bad as all that. She'll surprise us when she gets her match. That's by #boldprediction
Tweet 44: Imagine Jerry Lawler in Regal's on-screen role. It'd be ridiculous. For that matter he'd be ridiculous in his backstage role.
Tweet 45: Basically, Lawler is the exact opposite of Regal.

Rhyno v Finn Bálor

Tweet 46: Looking forward to Owens and Rhyno reuniting as SCUM, Jimmy Jacobs backstage with a big smile on his face.

Tweet 47: I like Owens and Saxton's interactions basically being a throwback to The Rock and Kevin Kelly.
Tweet 48: I want more Ruthless Aggression references in Rhyno matches.
Tweet 49: Owens trips to the commentary desk have seen him get increasingly more aggressive. I like that. It's more character development for him.
Tweet 50: Not that he's being short changed on the ol' character development.
Tweet 51: "Bálor's almost a hero in Japan!" - Rich Brennan, really doing a great job of putting Bálor over

Double stomp FTW.

Tweet 52: Wouldn't it be great if they brought Sandman into few to replace some of the exiting stars? He could revive his feud with Rhyno.
Tweet 53: SCUM versus Joe and Bálor? I'm down with that as a future tag main event.
Tweet 54: Good show, everyone. Good hustle. Especially you, Cassie.

NXTweet 10.06.15

The debut of Samoa Joe, Becky Lynch's first TV appearance since her hard-fought loss at Unstoppable, and, most importantly, the return of Mojo Rawley!

Intro

Tweet 1: Alright. NXT.

Tweet 2: Samoa Joe's an angry lad, isn't he?

Zack Ryder and Mojo Rawley v Elias Sampson and Mike Rawlis

Tweet 3: Zack Ryder. Oh no no.

Tweet 4: Pairing Ryder with Mojo is a good move though. Get some of that 2011 Ryder buzz rubbed off onto him.
Tweet 5: Mojo has the stink of a 1993 WCW mid-carder to him.
Tweet 6: Liking Ryder's trunks to be fair. Nice colour combo. I like colours.
Tweet 7: Big fan of Graves referencing MySpace. Drop a Bebo reference, I dare you.

Just a couple of hyped lads.

Tweet 8: Big win there for Mojo and Ryder over two jobber lads. BIg win. BIG win. Big WIN. #bigwin

Finn Bálor video

Tweet 9: Finn Bálor has a dark side. As evidenced by that video where his eyes went dark because of computer graphics stuff.

Dana Brooke video

Tweet 10: Dana Brooke reading there.

Tweet 11: This video is doing Dana a lot of favours. I think she's great already, to be fair.
Tweet 12: "I'm the total package!" - Dana Brooke linking herself to super-worker Lex Luger

Emma v Blue Pants

Tweet 13: Insane reaction for Blue Pants.

Tweet 14: Loling so hard at Emma's ultra-heelish attack from behind.
Tweet 15: Does Emma even do anything on the main roster anymore?

Emma's mean, yo.

Tweet 16: Obvs she's better off creatively in NXT but she had that time on the main roster and the division there is pretty light. Why not use her?
Tweet 17: Emma v Nikki and Emma v Naomi could be great. And she and Paige deserve some matches on the main roster.

Enzo Amore, Big Cass and Carmella promo

Tweet 18: Why is Carmella talking for Enzo?

Tweet 19: Ahhhhhh, here we go. Straight in with a Hunger Games reference. Strong.
Tweet 20: "I got plenty of time I got no time for this" - Enzo Amore

Bull Dempsey v Tyler Breeze

Tweet 21: Bull Dempsey match coming up. Remember when he blocked me on Twitter for reasons unknown?

Tweet 22: This is going to be my thing for Bull matches for the foreseeable future: mentioning he blocked me. Not like they're worth discussing.
Tweet 23: He is in there with Breeze though... *swoons*
Tweet 24: Maybe Bull blocked me for comparing him to Taz?
Tweet 25: Straight into a rest hold. Classic Bull.
Tweet 26: Bull's going for a top rope headbutt. I really want Byron or someone to reference Benoit, triggering an awkward silence.

They're sending you a pretty clear message, Bull mate.

Tweet 27: Loling hard at Bull being given a gimmick where he doesn't bother with cardio. Subtle move from creative that.

Jessie McKay v Becky Lynch

Tweet 28: Right now on NXT: remember that time less than a month ago when Becky Lynch lost a match? Harrowing stuff.

Tweet 29: Becky has retained her steampunk entrance. Smart move.
Tweet 30: Give her some big lad dressed as a robot butler as a manager. People will go mad for that.
Tweet 31: Oh hai Jessie McKay.
Tweet 32: Jessie is starting the journey Becky's been on: searching for a gimmick or strong performance to make fans care about her.
Tweet 33: Jessie's long knee pads will not be the key to her success.

This look on Becky has helped win me over on her.

Tweet 34: That match was a nice demonstration that Lynch isn't at a point where she can carry people to great matches.
Tweet 35: NXT is developmental though, so carrying people isn't necessarily the point.

William Regal makes an announcement then tells Bull Dempsey to get in shape

Tweet 36: #Regalpop

Tweet 37: Ahhhhhh Bull's new gimmick is less about lack of cardio abilities and more about general slobbishness. I'm a fan of this.
Tweet 38: "Listen, flower..." - William Regal channeling Eric Morecambe

Jason Jordan updates us on his tag team status

Tweet 39: Jason Jordan has a NEW tag partner. They'll lose. Maybe he'll get a third partner and they'll lose too.

Tweet 40: Jordan and Gable will then tag together and win. Jordan will be well impressed and they'll go on to live happily ever after.

Baron Corbin v Angelo Dawkins

Tweet 41: 'Wolf Shaman' Barry Corbin here. Looking forward to him using his wolf magic to beat this week's jobber.

Tweet 42: Angelo Dawkins is better than losing to Barry I reckon.
Tweet 43: Big fan of Corbin continuing to wrestle short matches just not as short as they were a while ago, and this change making him a heel.
Tweet 44: I think we can all agree it's going to be great when Owens drops the title to Balor and goes to RAW, leaving Bálor to feud with Corbin.
Tweet 45: Dawkins would have won if Sawyer Fulton had bothered to go to the ring and give him some moral support.

Scott Dawson v Samoa Joe

Tweet 46: Loling that Samoa Joe's first official WWE match is against Scott Dawson.

Tweet 47: Joe getting hyped as "one of the most dangerous men walking the planet" there.
Tweet 48: I like Owens saying he's not intimidated by Joe. Realistically why would he be? As he's pointed out he beat Cena in their first meeting.
Tweet 49: Kinda depressed Joe didn't get to beat CJ Parker in his debut match. I miss CJP.

Kthnxbye, Scott.

Tweet 50: Imagine if Ryback appeared and attacked Joe for using his finish.
Tweet 51: "First of all, Joe, I don't really run anywhere" - Kevin Owens
Tweet 52: Dying at these veteran and rookie comments from Owens. And the hypocrisy of him saying Joe has to earn a title match.
Tweet 53: Big, bad Billy Regal's putting in an appearance here. Casually dropping Joe v Owens for next week's show.
Tweet 54: Good show, everyone. I liked your hustle.

NXTweet 27.05.15

Kevin Owens solidifies his spot as one of WWE's prime bad guys, has words with William Regal, then trounces Solly Crowe. Emma, Bayley and Becky Lynch all get attention, possibly preparing them for title shots. Alexa Bliss gives us a shockingly good new character. Corey Graves continues to be WWE's best commentator. Jason Jordan and Chad Gable do... something. All this plus...

MOJO RAWLEY IS BACK ON NXT!!

Intro

Tweet 1: I'm going to tweet about NXT for as long as my internet holds up.

Tweet 2: Loving the slow motion recap of Takeover. Particularly Rhyno v Barry Corbin. Saddened there was no slowmo of Finn's entrance though.
Tweet 3: Banks being put over as "the elite." Great stuff.
Tweet 4: Then the only Samoan in WWE history not somehow related to Rikishi turned up. The end.

Kevin Owens promo, featuring William Regal and Solomon Crowe

Tweet 5: Kevin Owens trolling a Zayn entrance while wearing a Cena shirt. Lolishness.

Tweet 6: This is one of the few times I'm happy to see a RAW recap interrupting another show. Makes sense here.
Tweet 7: "I am a good man" - Kevin Owens
Tweet 8: Remember all those times Mick Foley said a heel has to believe he's the good guy and feel completely justified in his actions? That.

Owens is great and the championship means
something but that belt's still ugly.

Tweet 9: That Owens promo was better than anything I can remember from RAW this year.
Tweet 10: #Regalpop
Tweet 11: Awful music playing? It has to raspy-voiced piratical baked potato 'Solid' Solly Crowe.
Tweet 12: Loving the blank look on Byron's face.

Zack Ryder tells Renee Young that he's mates with Mojo Rawley and that he likes NXT

Tweet 13: Reading between the lines it's safe to say that Itami said he's going to murder whoever attacked him when he comes back. What a #man

Tweet 14: No, not Zack Ryder...
Tweet 15: MOJO IS BACK. #STAYHYPED
Tweet 16: Bring Zack Ryder in fresh from late 2011 to give the rub to Mojo. Smart booking.

Bayley v Emma

Tweet 17: Emma has completed her turn to the dark side with the implementation of new beach bum style entrance music.

Tweet 18: Emma looks shorter as a heel.
Tweet 19: "Beautiful suplex by Bayley!" - Rich Brennan on a rough suplex

The Emma Lock.

Tweet 20: Liking the blending of two singles feuds with this Bayley and Charlotte v Dana and Emma stuff. Subtly done.

Baron Corbin and Rhyno backstage

Tweet 21: How did Barry Corbin feel about beating Rhyno? He felt it proved he was the only unstoppable force in NXT.

Tweet 22: Then Rhyno rocked up and suggested a rematch. Winner becomes the most unstoppable force in the world.

Becky Lynch vignette

Tweet 23: This Becky video again. They won me over on her at Takeover. I don't need to see this again.

Tweet 24: Although in fairness this is the first time I've noticed Nikita (or Katie Lee Burchill) in that picture with Becky and Natalya.
Tweet 25: I hope Fifth Element steampunk lass is Lynch's permanent gimmick from now on.

Blake and Murphy v Elias Sampson and Mike Rawlis

Tweet 26: Heel Alexa Bliss. My word.

Tweet 27: So this is a Blake and Murphy match against two newcomers? *Looks at watch, waits for Enzo and Cass run-in*
Tweet 28: Devastating elevated punch from Blake there.
Tweet 29: Rumour is that the next Takeover will be headlined by Blake and Murphy v Enzo and Cass in a no-ropes barbed wire match.

Absolutely devastating sparkle splash.

Tweet 30: I hope Bliss still calls that the sparkle splash even though she's a heel now.
Tweet 31: Corey explaining that Alexa joined B&M because she likes sparkly things. No words. Solid gold commentary that.

Devin Tayor interviews Alexa Bliss while Blake and Murphy stand around like idiots

Tweet 32: Love this gimmick of all female wrestlers in NXT taking digs at Devin Taylor whenever they get the chance.

Finn Bálor v Tye Dillinger

Tweet 33: 'The Tyke' Tye Dillinger.

Tweet 34: How do you showcase your number one contender? Put him against a talented young gun like the Dillinger.

This is Tye Dillinger's ti- Oh, never mind.

Tweet 35: Dillinger has been around forever. If the next repackage job doesn't work we'll probably be seeing him in EVOLVE.
Tweet 36: Still gutted Team Jordillinger is no longer a thing.
Tweet 37: Note to Rich Brennan: don't describe one of your lead babyfaces as crafty. Craftiness carries distinctly heelish connotations.

Greg Hamilton interviews Jason Jordan then Chad Gable rocks up

Tweet 38: Earlier today Greg Hamilton caught up with 'The Real Double J' Jason Jordan.

Tweet 39: I hope Chad Gable starts using the phrase "Gable's able!" in his promos.
Tweet 40: Teasing us with a mystery tag partner for Jason Jordan? I can get with that. Especially if Jordan turns on whoever it is in favour of Gable.

Solomon Crowe v Kevin Owens

Tweet 41: I wish Crowe was still king of the hackers.

Tweet 42: Imagine the heat if Crowe was interfering in matches, channelling Paul E Dangerously and smashing iPads over people's heads.
Tweet 43: That's main event material.

What is Solomon Crowe's character?

Tweet 44: Remember when Owens would call his own matches using a microphone? Hoping he revives that on SmackDown or something at some point.
Tweet 45: Owens v Truth with Owens on commentary would be great fun. Maybe get Truth on too. Bickering commentary between opponents. Book it.
Tweet 46: The show should have cut to black when Owens pinned Crowe, revealing that Crowe's consciousness powers the internet.
Tweet 47: SAMOA JOE SO * CAL
Tweet 48: That star is a thing for some reason.
Tweet 49: Joe's here. We're meant to remember earlier when Owens said he'd KO Joe when he next saw him.
Tweet 50: Didn't happen. Owens ran off. He did make a comment about how Joe should have stayed in "oblivion" though. #TNAwful
Tweet 51: Great show, everyone. Good hustle.

The Secret Admirer

A month or so ago it was revealed that Kaitlyn has a secret admirer. We’ve been treated to a number of lifeless backstage segments in which we’ve seen the Divas champion discussing the situation with Natalya and Brodus Clay’s Funkadactyls. It’s not been the most engrossing television but at least it’s given WWE’s female champ something to do.

On the list of things confirmed for this evening’s RAW, sandwiched between Triple H wrestling Curtis Axel and the return of Dolph Ziggler, is the reveal of the secret admirer’s identity. To be clear, just because WWE say the identity’s going to be revealed doesn’t mean it will actually happen. There’s every chance that any segment featuring Kaitlyn will simply be designed to further the mystery. The entire thing could even be bumped from the show completely.

Anyone on the roster could theoretically be revealed as Kaitlyn’s would-be-beau, but a few stand out above the others. Probably the most obvious candidates are the Bellas. Yeah, both of them. They always operate as a unit.

They’ve been shown giggling to one another once or twice after Natalya and Kaitlyn’s chats, seemingly hinting at them playing a prank. Nikki and Brie playing a trick would set up a fresh and much needed feud for Kaitlyn. Nowadays a programme between a female champion and female twins means we’ll see wrestling matches. Back in the days of the Attitude Era it would have meant something very different. Jerry Lawler would have had a field day.

 

Is the secret admirer even real? Perhaps the Bellas are playing a trick

 

In a similar vein to the Bellas there’s potential for AJ Lee to be revealed as the one playing the prank. ‘The Crazy Chick’ became the number one contender to the Divas championship last month and hasn’t had her shot yet. She could be messing with Kaitlyn to throw her off her game for their upcoming match.

There’s nothing the Divas division needs more than plots for its performers. Either the Bellas or AJ would be good choices for a programme with ‘The Powerhouse Diva’.

Of course, the admirer is probably going to be a guy. Of the male members of the roster one of the favourites for the role is Big E Langston. If it is him there are two things WWE could do. The first is have Langston say that he was playing a joke (yep, just like the Bellas or AJ). That could feed into the AJ v Kaitlyn feud, and possibly develop into E realising that he upset Kaitlyn, regretting his actions and gradually turning face to pursue a real relationship with her.

The second option would be to have Big E’s feelings be genuine from the off. That could see him go babyface on Ziggler and AJ straight away or gradually over time. If this turns out to be WWE’s direction I think a slower approach would be best. Rushing things wouldn’t do Big E any favours. Audiences would be inclined to side with the more established and already popular ‘Show Off’. If WWE wants to promote that feud they need to bring it about slowly and convince viewers to cheer Langston. Forcing things won’t work.

For the record I like the Langston, Ziggler and AJ unit and think there’s loads left for them to do together. It’s too early to break them up. Leaving them together benefits all three and will ensure the split means more when it comes.

The only other name likely to be linked to Kaitlyn (that I can think of anyway) is Cody Rhodes. An on-screen relationship for the two was teased a few months ago before being dropped in favour of teaming the Rhodes Scholars with the Bellas. Pairing Cody with Kaitlyn now would not only give him a storyline (something he’s been without since last autumn) but it could also be used to lead to a face turn and a World Heavyweight title feud with Dolph Ziggler.

 

Cody has form when it comes to admiring Kaitlyn

 

There are other options of course, but none of them are terribly interesting. It’s the sort of storyline you could quite easily imagine being given to Zack Ryder. If the decision’s been made to wrap the story up instead of going somewhere with it (something that happens all too often in WWE) then Hornswoggle could very well be brought in to play the punchline. It could even be Christian’s route back on to television, despite the fact that he’s been married for twelve years.

Of everyone on the roster Rhodes would be my top choice for the role. He’s been a heel for a long time now. Going face would let him change his act. A well plotted story taking place over a number of months could see Cody initially spurned by Kaitlyn and showing his heartache before gradually winning her round and becoming an on-screen couple. If that doesn’t encourage audiences to sympathise with him and turn him into a genuinely liked star I don’t know what will.

The Civil War

Jack Swagger is going to remain in orbit around WWE's World Heavyweight title until Extreme Rules. At that show he will clash with current champ Dolph Ziggler and former champ Alberto Del Rio.

A title win for 'The Real American' seems unlikely, mainly because of the court date that’s still hanging over his head. WWE aren't likely to put their second most important belt on someone who may bring them negative press. Just as unlikely will be Swagger remaining a part of the title picture after the extreme PPV. By the time Extreme Rules is out of the way Swagger and Colter will have been feuding with ADR for three months. It'll be time for both men to do something new. So says WWE's time tested booking practice.

For man of the people Del Rio that will likely be a continuation of the feud he's currently got going on with Ziggler. Dropping Swagger will provide just enough of a change to keep their programme interesting (in theory anyway).

Theoretically Del Rio could be ditched to allow for a Ziggler v Swagger programme. Realistically that's not happening. It would require one man to switch to playing face and necessitate a step down the card for Alberto, who only started getting the star treatment again in January. Also, Ziggler versus Swagger matches would not be the finest things known to man.

This is going to leave Swagger with nothing obvious to do come May 20^th. Nothing with headline guys anyway, unless CM Punk returns to work with him. I can think of likelier scenarios.

What I'd like to see WWE do is drop Swagger down a level to help elevate someone from the lower ranks. The perfect choice is... wait for it... Zack Ryder. Okay, perfect may be stretching things a little but Ryder would be a good choice for a promotion.

'Long Island Iced Z' is already reasonably popular with fans. That makes moving him up a notch easier. He proved in his 2011 programme with Dolph Ziggler that he can get the crowd into a match if he's given more than two minutes to do so. He's underrated on interviews too. Most importantly (for the point I’m about to make anyway) Ryder is an American with a gimmick that reflects an aspect of American pop culture. Specifically, reality TV.

Since returning in February Swagger and his mouthpiece Uncle Zeb have claimed that America's society is broken. One aspect of this belief, illegal immigration, is what led to the programme between Swags and Del Rio. Ryder could be used as the embodiment of American failings, blamed by the heels for what's wrong with the country’s populace.

Is this what's wrong with America today?

Getting it right would be tricky. Fans haven't exactly reacted to Swagger like a main event star during his most recent push and ‘The Long Island Broski' has been on the bottom rung of the roster since dumping the US title (to Swagger, funnily enough) early last year.

The usual approach of weekly rushed segments paid off with a pay-per-view match nobody cares isn't going to suffice. Viewers need to be given reasons to root for Ryder and despise Swagger. That would mean giving each man time to get their points across in an engaging fashion. Ideally it would mean giving Ryder some wins before the programme begins too, so that he's taken more seriously as an opponent for a former world title contender (and indeed a former World champion), and so that the option is open to have 'The Real American' cost him matches to get the ball rolling.

WWE can do all of this but it's unlikely they will. Ryder isn't seen as important enough to be a part of a featured rivalry and Swags will probably go the same way once Del Rio's done with him. The idea is just completely alien to their current booking style. Which, when you get down to it, is pretty depressing.

The Downside of Recycling

I'll tell you what would improve WWE: a less regimented approach to who beats who. Or, put more simply, the current headliners starting to put over future headliners.
 
This isn't an area I think most of the current headliners are deliberately failing in. I think the writing team have become too used to having a select group of guys win most of the time. With the possible exception of Cena I think all of WWE's big stars would be happy to do their bit in this regard.
 
Apart from Ryback, and his credentials are questionable, every full time main event wrestler (which, for clarity, I consider to be Cena, Punk, Orton, Sheamus, Big Show, and ADR) has faced every other full time main event wrestler. It's true that reversing the heel-face roles for some of these feuds would freshen them up a bit, but that's only a short term solution. Turning someone doesn't completely overhaul their wrestling style and it only partially addresses the problem of stale characters.
 
The best thing WWE could do is select three or four guys and begin elevating them immediately after WrestleMania. Putting them into feuds with bigger stars and granting them clean, decisive victories would go a long way towards portraying them as the equals, rather than the inferiors, of the top boys. Ideally they'd all be given high profile programmes and sustained pushes across the summer, with the plan being to give each of the chosen ones something especially memorable to do at SummerSlam. Getting a world title or winning a particularly gruelling gimmick match, for example. That would also bolster SummerSlam’s rep as an important show. It's flagged badly in recent years.
 
Obviously Dolph Ziggler should top the list of new pushes. It seems likely he's going to leave WrestleMania XXIX as the World Heavyweight champion. There aren't many better ways to move someone up the bill than that.
 
Jack Swagger's a possible candidate but truthfully I think he's better cut out for the mid-card for now. He's solid in the ring and his recent character overhaul has worked out well but nothing about him stands out as headline calibre. He could benefit from 'The Show Off's' push though. As he's already involved in a WHC programme with ADR a three-way match at Extreme Rules is easy to imagine. That match would have the added bonus of having a heavily stocked ringside area. It could be great.
 
Cody Rhodes, Damien Sandow and Wade Barrett would all make good choices for a proper move upward too. Personally I'd select Barrett. I think Rhodes and Sandow are of more use as the Rhodes Scholars. All three are good enough to be placed into ongoing, pay-per-view rivalries with the big names. Sheamus would be an ideal opponent for any of them: he's wrestled good matches opposite opposite each one on TV but hasn't wrestled any in a major PPV bout.
 
WWE needs babyfaces too, of course. I'd love to suggest Zack Ryder, but he's been stuck doing so little for so long that a sudden leap to tangling with CM Punk on pay-per-view would stretch credibility too far. He would be an ideal candidate to be moved up into a vacated mid-card spot though.
 
Miz isn't a particularly strong candidate either. I'm more partial to his face turn than a lot of other people but I don't think he's due a return to the top any time soon. His niche is the upper mid-card.
 
A better option would be Kofi Kingston. WWE have faltered over pushing him in the past, but the fact they've started so often shows they see something in him. In fairness he's not quite a good enough promo to be a success in a promotion like WWE. They want their top guys to have it all.
 
That problem could be overcome though. Ask The Rock to spend an afternoon or two with him while he's still making regular appearances. Better yet, have 'The Great One' give a talk to the entire roster about connecting with an audience. He's one of the best ever at that. Everyone could learn something from him.

Serious face

 
The best new good guy WWE could go with is Daniel Bryan. 'The World's Toughest Vegan' has more experience than many of the promotion's existing stars, is one of the best wrestlers in the roster, and is a reliable promo. His character would need some tweaking because the whole yes and no thing is becoming played out, and because it's not something WWE are going to get behind with a headliner.
 
Establish Bryan as a face, separate him from Kane, either after a feud or an amicable split, and give him some wins over main eventers not named CM Punk on pay-per-view. If treated right he could be massive. In fact I’d go so far as to say that if he were booked correctly over the next year he could challenge Undertaker's Streak at WrestleMania XXX.
 
They key to getting this proposal to work would be sticking with the pushes and ensuring that each rising star was treated as an equal by whoever they were pitted against. The WrestleMania to SummerSlam stretch is a big enough gap to fit in two feuds for each guy. Plan out who's facing who, who's getting victories when, and stick to it all.
 
Most importantly, keep Cena away from the process. He's a liability and doesn't seem to understand how to make others look good. Worryingly he hasn't ever displayed any understanding of why he should, either.
 
The success of Santino at last year's SmackDown Elimination Chamber match shows that with the right booking anyone can become a serious star in WWE. Fans went wild for 'The Milan Miracle's' short battle with World champion Daniel Bryan. They genuinely believed that Santino could dethrone the champ, and they wanted to see it happen. If that can happen with a low card comedy act like Santino (who was a last minute replacement in that match, not the recipient of a long term push designed to make him a bigger name) then WWE can make anyone a star.

Real American

Anyone who's watched WWE over the last twelve months will be able to tell you that Antonio Cesaro has been a great success story. He's carved out a niche for himself as a rising star and enjoyed ring time with several of the company's top acts. Nobody gets to have competitive matches with Randy Orton, Sheamus and The Ryback unless they're being presented as something of worth.
 
The crowning achievement of Cesaro's WWE run so far is arguably his United States title reign. He won the strap on the SummerSlam pre-show, broadcast on YouTube, from comedy act Santino. Since then he's been presented as a fighting champion, working surprisingly enjoyable matches with the likes of R-Truth, Zack Ryder and Justin Gabriel.
 
He has proven himself to be a reliable wrestler and a reliable promo. Practically anyone on the roster could be put in a match with him and be made to look at least decent. He got something passable out of The Great Khali. Twice! If that doesn't prove his talent I don't know what does.

Zips are cool

 
Over the last few months Cesaro has dropped the anti-America shtick that characterised the early weeks and months of his US title run and instead started embracing the country. Coming to the ring waving Old Glory and wearing trunks patterned with stars and stripes while disingenuously endorsing the US has proven a far more effective way of having fans turn on him than merely proclaiming himself (and Switzerland) better would in 2013. It's been a smart, enjoyable move.
 
I'd like to see Cesaro take things even further and begin emulating Hulk Hogan. Throughout the 80s 'The Hulkster's' chief gimmick was that of the uber-patriot. It was a clever move back then. The Cold War was still an ongoing thing and the US fans were generally happier to cheer a guy wrestling in a singlet interpretation of the national flag than they are today. It was cheap but it didn't matter. It worked.
 
Have Cesaro wrestle decked out in red and yellow tye dye trunks with a Swiss Cross or the Stars and Stripes on them. Let him keep the flag and the championship he's restored credibility to and add the Hogan pose routine to the act. Even if just for one night, say WrestleMania, I think it would be great. The heel European rubbing the embarrassing, overly-patriotic image of Hogan, a man who has since become somewhat of an embarrassment to the wrestling business in general, into the faces of fans. I can hear the boos (and ironic cheers) now.