That RAW Recap 19.10.15

This week's RAW featured a few key moments.

You just had to know where to look for them. Here's a hint: they weren't in the Nikki Bella and Alicia Fox v Naomi and Sasha Banks match, or the throwaway Bad News Barrett, Sheamus and Rusev versus Dolph Ziggler, Cesaro and Adrian Neville six man. Nor were they in Kevin Owens versus ark Henry. Although, for the record all three good for what they were. Nikki over as the serious title contender she should be considering her tenure and status as longest reigning Divas champ ever. The six man was a fun match which got some over lads on the show and gave them time to do their thing. And Owens v Henry featured Owens hitting his pop-up power bomb on 'The World's Strongest Man', establishing that he's strong enough to hit Ryback (his HIAC opponent) with it should the opportunity arise.

But, as I say, these things weren't anything noteworthy. The big segments from this week's RAW were the Undertaker and Lesnar confrontation, a dressing down of WWE champ Seth Rollins by Shawn Michaels, and an impromptu Shield reunion and match opposite their old foes the Wyatt Family.

This was fun to see but what an unbelievable waste.

The Shield reunion wasn't. It was Rollins agreeing to team up with Ambrose and Reigns to demonstrate to Shawn Michaels that he could "stop the show" then turning on them at the end of the match. Because the whole point of Rollins' character is that he's a dick who deserves a slap. In theory this worked but in practice it was incredibly wasteful. The first teaming of 'The Hounds of Justice' since their split in the summer of last year should have been a huge deal.

Instead it was a transparent attempt to increase ratings and it didn't even get that right. The least WWE should have done if this was their plan was to announce the match a week in advance and plug it non-stop to get people watching next week. Okay, that may have made some people think it was a full-time reunion but the answer to that would have been simple: have Rollins give a promo about not needing Ambrose and Reigns and Ambrose and Reigns say they don't trust Rollins but need him for this one match. It would have made time for word to spread and people to get excited about the match, increasing the chance of a larger viewing figure.

But it was more than that. The Shield shouldn't be something tossed out as a ratings grab. It will devalue their inevitable full-time (until the equally inevitable second split at least) reunion whenever it comes. The three men, though particularly Rollins and Reigns, are all clearly going to be big parts of the WWE landscape for years. They should be protected. And that means planning things like a reunion far in advance, working towards it and getting it right when it happens, not giving it away on free TV with only an hour's build-up.

On top of that things just felt off. Erick Rowan returning to the fold is fine. It actually helps get across Wyatt's cult leader deal because he slotted in with new lad Braun Strowman beautifuly. But Luke Harper not being involved was wrong. He and Wyatt are more over than Rowan and Strowman by a significant margin. He clearly should have been in the match yet he wasn't even at ringside. Rowan and 'The Black Sheep' are both very good in their roles but they can't hold a candle to Harper's ring skills and compelling weirdness.

Strong mic work from HBShizzle here.

HBK dressing down Rollins worked. The gist of Michaels' argument was that 'The Future' is content with the accolade of being the new Shawn Michaels when he should be concentrating on making his own name mean more and creating a legacy for himself. Which is hard to argue against (although it's worth noting that comparisons between Rollins and Michaels haven't been as frequent as this segment would suggest). Not to say that Rollins' doesn't have name value of his own, he clearly does, but he seems content to accept mediocre booking in exchange for getting to be world champ. Stories of 'The Heartbreak Kid' from the 90s make it hard to imagine him standing for this sort of booking.

Of course WWE now is different to the WWF then. And, perhaps more importantly, Vince McMahon has some bizarre attitudes towards the "millennials" that make up the bulk of his roster. That he was about as close to a Michaels mark as he could be in the 90s is a factor here too. Vince was less inclined to knock 'The Heartbreak Kid' than he is his current stars. But these political undertones, Michaels acting as Vince's mouthpiece, just added another layer of enjoyment to the situation.

It worked on the intended level of a respected veteran returning and condemning the current champion and as an insight into the backstage manoeuvrings of the promotion. Michaels and Rollins were both excellent. Particularly 'The Showstopper'. The only bad thing about it is that it made people (by which I mean me) want a Rollins v Michaels match that will never happen.

The showdown between Undertaker and Brock Lesnar was good because of how everything was slotted together. Despite having basically become a guy obsessed with avenging the loss of his WrestleMania Streak and being willing to make cheap shots to do it 'The Dead Man' was presented as the face here. The reason for that is that he was introduced by 'Stone Cold' Steve Austin (hey, he was there anyway, I've been saying since the podcast specials started that I think it makes sense to put him on RAW) and they were in Texas. Despite being announced from Death Valley he's a Texan and this audience was not going to boo him.

In Your House: Mind Games.

'Taker was basically there to remind anyone who's forgotten what is motivation is and to react to Brock Lesnar's advocate Paul Heyman. He gave 'The Last Outlaw' plenty to react to, explaining the story of the rivalry one final time, making clear what both men stand to gain from a win, and, of course, hammering home that his client, Brock Lesnar, conquered The Streak. 'Taker tried goading Lesnar into leaving the ramp and getting into the ring to fight. Hothead Lesnar was ready to accept this challenge before being convinced to hold off by Heyman. This framed 'The Beast' as a coward to the live crowd but the wider point was that Heyman knew 'Taker was trying to get inside Lesnar's head to gain an advantage going into their match, another cheap move by 'The Phenom' (although not one out of character, to be fair). The segment worked as a hype job for the Hell in a Cell main event and left the two men ready to take their correct roles: Lesnar the monster face and 'Taker the subtle heel desired desperate to win at any cost.

It wasn't the most exciting episode of RAW ever. But it was memorable and significant because of and for these segments. With such a clear unwillingness from WWE to formulate a long term creative plan, alter the way they present their performers, or do something different to what they've been doing for the last fifteen years, that's the most that we can realistically hope for on a Monday night.

The WWE Tag Team Division's Battle Against Fate

WWE's tag team division hasn't had an easy time of it this year. This is a shame. There's clearly been effort put into making it worthwhile and a worthwhile tag division would be most welcome. It would help WWE's TV product to feel more interesting and lively. It would also give the many lower cards wrestlers who currently have nothing going on something to do.

The Usos disappeared after WrestleMania because Jey suffered a shoulder injury. Their status as the company's longest-standing, most reliable unit likely altered plans for the division. It's all too easy to imagine that they were pegged to work with New Day, who would officially go heel within a month of 'Mania. To an extent their unexpected hiatus was probably a good thing. It's all too easy to imagine that, had the Usos been available, we wouldn't have seen as much of the various other units on the roster.

Sadly the main team I (and probably most other people) would have wanted to see featured also disappeared due to an injury. Tyson Kidd suffered what has apparently been described as a freak neck and spinal injury in a dark match against the newly signed Samoa Joe in early June, ending his run alongside Cesaro. Weeks later Erick Rowan tore his bicep at a house show (or, if you prefer, live event). He'd reunited with his Wyatt Family partner Luke Harper in May and it seems likely, now that SummerSlam's been and gone, that the three original Wyatt Family members were to be put back together for a six man tag against Ambrose, Reigns and someone else (Sting, according to the rumour mill) at 'The Hottest Event of the Summer'.

These losses were in addition to the unfocused use of The Ascension and the Lucha Dragons. Konor and Viktor were never going to amount to a great deal in WWE but had they been used with more care earlier in the year they could have been a far more over act by now. The Dragons, on the other hand, should have been given far more to do and received some protection from the writing team. They're an exciting team with obvious merchandise potential. Kalisto is very clearly a singles act waiting to happen who could be that Top Latin Star™ role we're always hearing WWE want. He may not have the name value or status of Rey Mysterio but he's ten times the worker Mysterio is these days. And he wears a cooler mask! What more do they want?

The tag division had mostly been left to the Prime Time Players and New Day. Focusing on two teams is nothing new. It's been the standard approach from WWE for years now. But it's disappointing because they seemed to be setting up a positively thriving division with the Usos, Cesaro and Kidd, the Wyatts, New Day, and the Lucha Dragons. New Day and the PTPs are very engaging teams who connect with audiences well in their respective roles and it would have been nice for them to have had a deeper roster to work with, even though the PTPs wouldn't have been receiving as much attention as they have been.

The good news is that despite all of these injuries and scuppered plans WWE is forging ahead with making doubles ranks worthwhile. The post-SummerSlam August 24 episode of Monday Night RAW saw a return and a debut that should and could impact on the division. 

These lads know how to win belts.

The returnees were the Dudley Boyz. Which may not mean anything to some people because it's actually been ten years since they were last employed by WWE and allowed to use that name. For the last decade they've been Team 3D in TNA. They're former twenty-four time world tag team champions, having held the WWE tag team titles once, the WWE world tag team titles eight times, the ECW tag team titles eight times, the WCW tag team titles once (although that was when the belts were under WWF ownership), the TNA tag team titles (a surprisingly low) two times, the NWA tag team titles once, the HUSTLE super tag team championship once, and the IWGP tag team titles two times. How many of these reigns are recognised by WWE is anybody's guess. I'd assume they'd count the WWE, WCW and ECW reigns but they could surprise us and acknowledge others.

In addition to being the most decorated double act to ever hit the wrestling biz the Dudleys are twenty year veterans and were a significant part of the Attitude Era. That Maggle Cole said that the tag scene had gotten more interesting when the Duds hit the ring to attack New Day and have a staredown with the Prime Time Players indicates that their return will be a permanent one, or at least not something that's over after a few weeks.

I'm interested to see what's done with Bubba and Devon. Matches against New Day and the Prime Time Players seem likely and both could be good. I'm be particularly interested in seeing them tackle heat magnets New Day which, judging by the last week of television, seems like a match we'll get at Night of Champions. A match with the Usos could also be fruitful considering the big bumps Jimmy and Jey frequently take. It's just a pity The Ascension weren't afforded better booking. If they had they'd probably be ideal opponents for the Dudleys right now.

The Wyatt Lads.

Monday's debut was Braun Strowman. He's a developmental guy who's been under contract since May 2013. Naturally he's been based at the Performance Center for the last year. Although he never appeared in a match on NXT he did feature regularly for a while as the large Spartan in Adam Rose's Exotic Express entourage. That he never got an official debut on the developmental programme likely means that WWE are still willing to have guys bypass a period of televised learning if the right spot presents itself on the main roster. This is a good thing. It means they're in a better position to surprise us.

Strowman joined Wyatt and Harper in attacking and ultimately laying out Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns. Presumably the Shield lads will recruit a third man to help them in their battle against the Wyatt Family. Cesaro would be a nice addition, but I'd take Dolph Ziggler or anyone vaguely talented with not much to do right now. Once that feud's done it seems reasonable to assume that the Wyatts will stay together and two members will form a regular tag team. As much as I love Luke Harper he deserves to be the number two singles guy of that group. Strowman and Rowan would be a good pairing. Rowan is painfully bland and Strowman seems green around the edges. Pairing them would help cover these failings and give the tag division more bodies.

The summer of 2015 could have featured a great tag division without the spate of injuries we saw. But there's nothing to stop WWE getting their plans back on track and factoring in the Dudleys and an altered Wyatt line-up. A division with New Day, the Dudleys, and the Usos on top and the Wyatt Family, the Lucha Dragons, The Ascension, and the Prime Time Players in supporting roles sounds pretty good to me.

Summoning the Demon

Anyone who watched the RAW after WrestleMania (and as it was guaranteed to be one of the most eventful episodes of the year that should be most people reading this) would have seen Adrian Neville make his main roster debut. Or, more accurately, Neville make his main roster debut. He's dropped the first name between NXT and Monday Night RAW. Very probably because Vince McMahon doesn't think the name sounds tough enough.

With this call-up WWE has an ideal opportunity to set up another one in a couple of months time. Here's how...

Adrian Neville doing some weird Hawkeye pose.

Have Nev win some more showcase matches over the next couple of months. Maybe put him in a feud with a mid-card heel who's not doing much (which is most people). Someone like Stardust would be ideal, or New Day if they go bad. The idea would be to establish him as a flashy wrestler who can win so that people have reasons to care about him.

Between now and April reunite Erick Rowan and Luke Harper. Nothing fancy would be needed to achieve that. They could simply watch one another's matches from the stage for a few weeks and having little staring contests afterwards. On the RAW after Extreme Rules have one of them wrestle a match against Cesaro or Tyson Kidd. Harper would be nice because he's the better of the two but Rowan is the established face so he'd probably make more sense.

Rowan (or Harper) could beat Cesaro (or Kidd) and then Harper (or Rowan) could wander out to the ring and together the swamp-lovin' lads (decent team name right there) could beat down Kidd and Cesaro. Harper, Kidd and Cesaro are all officially designated heels by WWE but that shouldn't matter. This could just be a feud in which people cheer for whichever team they like best. That's a direction WWE should be testing more anyway.

After the standard array of singles matches between the two teams they could have a tag title match at Payback. Rowan and Harper would win. They could head into defences against the Usos (who they had good matches with last year) and the Lucha Dragons. Maybe the Prime Time Players and New Day too.

Meanwhile the disgruntled former champs could attack Neville (yeah, I got it back to him) during a match the night after Payback. It needn't be a DQ finish or anything. Neville could win a match then be attacked. By that point he'd have two months of TV exposure behind him, enough time for people to think it bad that two angry blokes are taking out their frustrations on him.

This would naturally lead to a couple of singles matches between Nev and the former tag champs. Ideally he'd lose to both Kidd and Cesaro via interference, distractions and shenanigans. These screwy finishes would give him a reason to challenge both of them to a tag match at Money in the Bank: they could interfere but he'd have someone there to watch his back. Cesaro and Kidd would accept and the Nevster would promise a mystery partner for the show.

Neville and Bálor could do a lot of good in the tag division.

Naturally this mystery partner would be Finn Bálor. Just as naturally he and Neville would win the match. This would be an ideal show-opener and would help to make Money in the Bank a memorable show. With it having become one of WWE's most important pay-per-views that's probably going to be a priority. It's also worth noting that as so many guys always get funnelled into a ladder match there'd be a good amount of time available for Cesaro, Kidd, Neville and Bálor to do something  particularly worthwhile.

From there Neville and Bálor could enter the tag division. They could win another tag bout the next night on RAW (maybe a rematch against Cesaro and Kidd) and then tell some backstage interviewer that they like teaming and that they're setting their sights on tag team gold. A win over the Usos, the closest thing WWE has to a well-established, always on top form team, at Battleground could set them up as challengers to Harper and Rowan at SummerSlam. Winning championships in their SummmerSlam debut would draw attention to the lads and allow talk of them being the future of the company to sound legitimate.

This would reinvigorate the tag division and create a platform for two new guys to make an impact in their first months on the roster. Which means it's something WWE aren't going to do.

NXTweet 01.04.15

Sami Zayn returns! Team Jordillinger implodes! Emma acts heelish again! And Hideo Itami and Tyler Breeze continue their feud in a two-out-of-three falls match! All this... and more!

Intro

Tweet 1: I'm watching NXT... now.

Tweet 2: Coming up: 53.40 of goodness. Minus ads.
Tweet 3: Dedicating this episode to the memory of CJ Parker's developmental contract.

Sami Zayn returns

Tweet 4: I'm just noticing that Sami Zayn has disproportionately large hands.

Tweet 5: Lad in the audience sporting a flat cap there. It's catching on, Sami! #nevergiveup
Tweet 6: Basically Sami Zayn returned after about a month and a half off and said he's going to have a rematch. Lovely stuff.

Rhyno v Unnamed Bloke

Tweet 7: 'The Ladbeast' Rhyno.

Wrestling in a T-shirt. What have you become, Rhyno?

Tweet 8: Disappoints this year's 'Mania didn't feature a story about how Rhyno Gored his wife in a hotel foyer.
Tweet 9: "It doesn't matter!" - 'The Brahma Rhyno'

Dana Brooke video

Tweet 10: We're all agreed Dana Brooke is being brought in to replace Natalya as the resident strong style blonde who uses Bret Hart's colour scheme, yeah?

Footage of Kevin Owens after his match with Finn Bálor last week

Tweet 11: Wandering what Owens did after he retained the title last week? He say backstage and had a laugh. Good for him. Good for Kevin.

Emma v Bayley

Tweet 12: Emma getting her babyface bubble intro then not doing the skin the cat entrance. Lol, mate.

Tweet 13: The commentary team are acknowledging catcalls from the audience! What witchcraft is this?!
Tweet 14: Vince will explode when he hears that happened.

Roll-up for the win, bro.

Tweet 15: Disappointed that the audience aren't more into this match. It's good and Emma and Bayley are both over.
Tweet 16: Maybe they don't know to treat Emma as a heel after her slap work the other week.
Tweet 17: Emma's going to carry on losing. Eventually she'll be pushed over the edge and unveil a Great Muta-esque heel persona.

Devin Taylor interviews Becky Lynch

Tweet 18: Becky Lynch. Does anybody care about Becky Lynch? No. Not even Becky Lynch cares about Becky Lynch.

Tweet 19: "Why hasn't Becky Lynch had her shot?" - Becky Lynch
Tweet 20: The reason I dislike Lynch is that she comes out with generic heel promos like that. Impossible to believe she believes it.
Tweet 21: Also the rocker chick gimmick is deeply clichéd. And she doesn't seem to believe in that either.

Lucha Dragons v Blake and Murphy

Tweet 22: Still loving Blake and Murphy's 90's kids' TV theme music.

Tweet 23: If there had ever been a rave seen on Power Rangers this is the music they'd have used.
Tweet 24: I like the way Kalisto's really energetic and happy and Sin Cara half-heartedly goes through his pose routine.
Tweet 25: They should change his ring name to Rey Kalisto. Just to troll Mysterio.
Tweet 26: "I got him!" Wesley 'Jeff Jarrett' Blake

LUCHA! LUCHA! LUCHA! LUCHA!

Tweet 27: Blake and Murphy should be put in dungarees and called up to the main roster as Bray Wyatt's new henchmen.
Tweet 28: On the subject of Wyatt's henchmen, Rowan needs to be repackaged as an unkempt psychology lecturer. Signature foreign object: Rubik's cube.
Tweet 29: Blake and Murphy winning via shenanigans, a running suplex and a frog splash. That was the best bit of the match and that's upsetting.

Devin Taylor interviews Sami Zayn, Rhyno appears and grunts

Tweet 30: That Rhyno and Zayn confrontation was erotic.

The Mega Powers Explode: Jason Jordan v Tye Dillinger

Tweet 31: RIP Team Jordillinger. Can't believe this match is happening. Heartbreaking end of an era.

Tweet 32: Jordan's busting out a singlet for his singles run. Hoping he adopts Jerry Lawler's tear down a strap routine.

Saddening scenes as Jordan and Dillinger face off.

Tweet 33: Within seconds BOTH straps are down. Jason Jordan is out of control!
Tweet 34: Jordan wins. Erm... good?

Tyler Breeze v Hideo Itami

Tweet 35: Fifteen minutes left to fit in a video package, entrances and a two-out-of-three falls match? Good luck with that.

Tweet 36: Maybe someone will go over with two straight falls. Probs not though. That's not a very WWE approach.
Tweet 37: And I think it's worth reminding ourselves sometimes that as good as NXT is it's still ultimately WWE.
Tweet 38: Look! Look, everyone! It's Tyler! #swoon
Tweet 39: I popped for the selfie stick. #notlikethat
Tweet 40: Disappointed Hideo's not carried over KENTA's love of pork pie hats.
Tweet 41: KICKS.

The power of kick!

Tweet 42: Itami gets the first fall via kicking.
Tweet 43: I'll tell you what. This buff referee needs to slim down a bit. He's upstaging the rasslers.
Tweet 44: Logically, the first fall of two-out-of-three fall matches should be roughly the length of a regular match and it rarely is.
Tweet 45: "Playing possum they call it!" - Corey Graves on playing possum
Tweet 46: This match is good though, innit.
Tweet 47: I like Hideo's hair and I don't care who knows it.
Tweet 48: Breeze winning is a pleasant surprise. That's part of what makes NXT so enjoyable though. The main guys are kept equal.
Tweet 49: Still not wild about the Beauty Shot as a finish though. He needs a DDT variant called the Botox Injection. I've said this before...
Tweet 50: Good episode, everyone. Good hustle.

Monster Future

Over the years Big Show and Kane have both proven valuable to WWE. At various times in their careers each has been successfully presented as a legitimate monster. It's never lasted, usually because of the company's insistence on turning them into comedic babyfaces, but they have been able to slot into these roles when needed. The monster heel is an incredibly useful trope for a wrestling promotion to be able to call on, making Kane and Show handy guys to have around.

But this year's Royal Rumble highlighted that the pair of big lads are not as over as they once were. Perhaps it's because of how many times they've switched from heel to face and back again. Perhaps it's because they've been on the roster for so long that too many people in the audience now know that no matter how dominant either of them may become it's just a matter of time before they start losing to mid-carders. Perhaps it's simply because Big Show's been with the company for sixteen years and Kane eighteen (longer if you count his pre-'Big Red Machine' gimmicks).

Whatever the reason the fact that the audience turned so viciously on the climax of the Rumble demonstrates that Show and Kane are not what they once were. Yes, Daniel Bryan's early elimination, Roman Reigns' status as favourite to win, and the general booking played their parts too but two members of the old boys' club being booked to dominate young stars was a big reason the Philadelphia crowd got so riled. They wanted something and someone new. They would have been far more accepting of Bray Wyatt and Rusev being portrayed as the dominant heel pair, because they're fresher and viewed as more deserving of top spots. That's what modern audiences look for and that's something WWE's writing team (and Vince McMahon) don't seem to be able to grasp: modern audiences have strong opinions about people earning top spots.

Sooner or later 'The Devil's Favourite Demon' and 'The World's Largest Athlete' are going to call it a career, either when they decide to stop because they're too knackered or because McMahon decides they've had their time (it will almost certainly be the former). When that time comes WWE is going to need some new larger-than-average performers to fill the monster role. A quick glance at the roster reveals that there are actually a number of guys with potential to fill the void.

Luke Harper is a beard type Pokémon.

The most prominent candidate is probably Luke Harper. He has a head start over other names with regard to TV time and he possesses the requisite height and set of power moves to make a convincing monster heel. Just as importantly he has an eerie look that would lend itself well to the part. Harper is believable as a big bruiser who won't, or can't, be reasoned with.

His former teammates Erick Rowan and Bray Wyatt do little for me in this regard. Rowan has proven to be completely lost outside of the safe tag and six man environment that protected him as part of the Wyatt Family. Nothing about his matches makes me think he'll develop a suitably menacing style. His look is decent but not as strong as Harper's, or as some of the other names on this list.

'The New Face of Fear' is obviously going to go on to become a star attraction for WWE. He's most of the way there already. But while he may have a fitting air of menace about him, win fairly often, and possibly earn world championships in the future, he doesn't have the height monsters in wrestling traditionally do. He can be a headline act but he can't be someone who physically dominates whoever he steps into the ring with because he simply doesn't have the feet and inches to do it.

But height isn't everything. Big Cass is one of the tallest guys (if not the tallest guy) under contract but while he's in good shape his frame clearly isn't one made to hold a lot of muscle. He can look intimidating but it's hard to imagine him destroying guys because he's just a bit on the lanky side. In this regard he's like Kevin Nash, because Nash wasn't ever really used as a monster after his initial push to the top was over. He was more a heel with a bad attitude who could obliterate mid-card guys but had to take his time with main event names like Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels. Even Rey Mysterio held his own against 'Big Sexy'.

The top two candidates in NXT are Bull Dempsey and Baron Corbin. Dempsey isn't incredibly tall or anything, but he's tall enough in comparison to the majority of the guys who'll comprise the main roster in a few years time. Plus he's beefy, which helps him look intimidating. He looks and wrestles the part and carries himself like a big deal.

Corbin can look moody pretty well.

But it's Corbin who seems like he has the better chance. His dispassionate (some may say vacant) stare before, during and after his matches is perfect. He has the height and enough muscle to look right presented as an unstoppable beast. The one thing he seems to lack right now is the ability to wrestle a competent match. He's looked good in his twenty second squashes but that's not surprising: it's nigh on impossible to look bad winning a twenty second match.

What's telling is his one competitive match in NXT so far, opposite Adrian Neville on the January 15 episode, saw his opponent do the majority of the work. Even in a five minute match Corbin looked out of his depth. But this is why he's in the developmental system: to learn and improve. If he learns enough then maybe he'll surpass my top pick Harper and become WWE's next resident monster.

SmackTalk 29.01.15

When snowstorms stopped WWE from promoting a live post-Royal Rumble RAW they compromised, relocating to WWE Headquarters in Stamford, Connecticut to put on a show based around interview segments. It was a smart move to make and they put on a very good show considering the severe limitations placed on them. But wrestling is about, well, wrestling, and as much as I suspect they enjoyed producing a three hour show with no in-ring content WWE needed to get back into an arena at some point. They decided to reschedule their trip to the XL Center in Hartford from Monday to Thursday, promoting a live edition of SmackDown in its new timeslot.

Michael Cole, Byron Saxton and Jerry 'The King' Lawler welcomed us to the show, immediately hyping Reigns v Big Show and Bryan v Kane in a casket match. They referred to it as the final battle in their long feud. It’s worth noting at this point that the Bryan and Kane problems date back to the spring of 2012. They’ve feuded, on and off, for nearly three years. Time will tell whether this really will be the end but I'm not expecting it to be true.

Triple H got things going with a promo. Because WWE is incapable of starting live TV shows without an in-ring promo. He welcomed the crowd to Monday Night RAW (what a joker, eh?) before putting over WWE being great for working around not being allowed to do RAW on Monday and finally hitting their Network subscribers goal. After some jokes about balls (related to some sort of NFL controversy I'm not aware of because I’m not American) he said he will resolve the problem that is Sting at Fast Lane.

Then he talked about the controversy of the Royal Rumble. Apparently Reigns winning is considered controversial. I don't understand why it's controversial that a man won a match completely legally. 'The Game' said he'd end the controversy on Monday's RAW. Presumably this will take the form of a match announcement for Fast Lane.

Roman Reigns smouldering.

Before Tripper could leave he was joined by Reigns, who agreed with my feeling that his Rumble win was not a controversial situation. He was booed. Big Show was brought out for their scheduled match and Trips ambled backstage. The match would have been enjoyable had Reigns steamed through Show in minutes, a dynamic performance to demonstrate that he's above proven losers like Show.

But that didn't happen. What we got was a twelve and a half minute match that saw Reigns being worked over and failing to look like a powerhouse. At one point he did a performed a headscissors takedown, the exact opposite of the sort of moves he should be doing. He was also heavily booed throughout the match. WWE should have realised less is more and limited Reigns' camera time. He did at least win though, kicking out of a choke slam to hit two Superman punches, on a 'Giant' who had stupidly clambered up to the top rope, and a spear. Yep, it took three finishers to put Show down.

After a reminder that Schwarzenegger is going into the Hall of Fame Seth Rollins wandered out for a bit of a chat. His entrance got more cheers than Reigns' did. He put over his performance at the Rumble, how he’d come one second away from winning the title, and how he’s broken Lesnar's rib. He issued an open challenge, waited for approximately one second, and then started bragging that nobody wanted to face him.

Ryback not ruling.

Ryback's music hit and he came out to prove Rollins wrong. J&J Security and Rollins jumped Ryback. ‘Eerie’ Erick Rowan made the save. Rollins knocked him off the apron and went back to stomping 'The Big Guy'. Ziggler came out to round things out. The heels managed to fight their way out of the ring and ran backstage. I expected this to lead to a match later in the show. It didn’t.

We were next shown a topless Kane caressing a casket in a dimly lit room somewhere in the building. He talked about ending Daniel Bryan. It was distinctly un-PG.

Match number two was the very promising Tyson Kidd v Jey Uso. Sadly they got less than three minutes, nowhere near long enough for the competitive match they could have produced. Kidd worked the leg and got the win after drop kicking the knee and hitting a fisherman’s neck breaker. This match should have had its time swapped with Reigns and Show. That would have resulted in a far more enjoyable match and Reigns looking like a juggernaut for trouncing Show.

Another shot of Kane was shown with the casket. This time he didn't say anything. He just gazed into the casket. Maybe he was thinking about Katie Vick?

Rusev and Lana rocked up for a promo as the first hour drew to a close. Speaking English, Rusev said he should have won the Rumble. Even though he was thrown out easily and Reigns never got put over the top rope. Weak argument, bro. He said he deserved Lesnar but he was being given a man with no titles, hunger or desire, a man from the past, John Cena.

Naturally these words brought Cena out to the ring. Cena half-heartedly put over Rusev's accomplishments then vigorously talked himself up before challenging Rusev to fight him then and there. Rusev was up for it. Lana told him not to waste his time. He listened to her and they left the ring. The crowd booed. Cena made a gag about Lana being a ho and said he'd defeat Rusev at Fast Lane. But he would say that wouldn't he.

I'm not liking Rusev's chances.

There’s time to make the Rusev v Cena feud great but their early interactions haven’t filled me with confidence. Cena doesn’t seem to want to treat Rusev seriously. If he doesn’t then he’ll undo a year of good work building Rusev up as a credible upper mid-card heel and tank his chances of progressing further. The progression would help the company as a whole but create competition for Cena. It’s worth remembering that.

Paige spoke to Renee Young about her Divas championship match at Fast Lane. She was immediately interrupted by the Bellas. They made comments about Paige's skin tone, comparing her to snow and vampires. Paige laughed then elbowed Brie. The Bellas ended the segment on top, Nikki posing with her belt like she was in the ring.

The Ascension had a picture in picture promo as they headed to the ring for their match against Goldust and Stardust. Konnor called the New Age Outlaws D-geriatrics (because they were in D-Generation X, geddit?) and Viktor called Goldust "Oldust". Great stuff. The writing team really earned their money with this stellar material. It was a standard issue tag match. Stardust was pinned with The Fall of Man after tagging himself in against Goldust's better judgement.

Kane was again shown with the casket. Smoke had appeared in the room since he was last shown. He laughed (maybe because of the smoke?) then slammed the casket shut.

It wasn’t main event time quite yet. A backstage promoting a Syfy show about magic had to take place first. Alicia Fox, Zack Ryder, Summer Rae, and R-Truth were shown marking out over a magician from said Syfy magic show. He took a bite out of an Oreo cookie appear (product placement much?) and then made a whole one appear. Everyone was amazed by this.

Miz and Mizdow showed up. The magician lad said he'd always wanted to do a "trick" (ermmmmmm... real magicians call them illusions) with an A-lister. Miz fawned before the guy revealed he was talking about Mizdow, who broke character to shake his hand. The guy taught Miz a trick. Mizdow mimed Miz’s hand movements. The magician ended up cracking an egg he'd made appear on Miz's face, to prove it was real. It was as funny as you'd expect. In other words, not at all (except for Mizdow's miming).

In a darkened room Bray Wyatt asked what made people happy. He revealed that he's happy doing things most people aren't. He also mentioned smiles. It was even more pointless than the magic skit.

Budget cuts meant that there were no crew to set up the casket for the casket match. Kane had to  wheel it out and put it in place before Bryan's entrance. Poor old Kane, always getting lumbered with the unglamorous jobs. And, for that matter, the jobs.

They had the best match possible considering the crummy gimmick they were lumbered with and the over familiarity of their pairing together. The final three minutes were very good. Bryan slipped out of a Tombstone piledriver on the apron and hit several charging drop kicks, wobbling 'The Demon' over the coffin before getting thrown to the mat with a choke slam. ‘The Big Red Machine’ rolled Bryan into the casket and leant across him to close the lid. Bryan applied the Yes Lock and worked Kane into the casket and himself onto the apron. He tried closing the thing but Kane fought out and back into the ring where they ran through Tombstone, Yes Lock and choke slam attempts before D-Bry yanked down the top rope and a charging Kane wound up on the apron. A roundhouse kick dizzied him and a running knee sent him sprawling back into the casket, slamming the lid closed to win.

He's beaten Kane on SmackDown but what will he do at WrestleMania?

Bryan stood on the casket celebrating for two minutes before the show ended. It was a long time to celebrate, but for some reason the decision had been made for Michael Cole to yammer away about Triple H’s promise to address the imaginary controversy on RAW as the show closed. Bryan had to hang about because of that. Still, there are worse ways to close a show.

For the most part this SmackDown was decent. I’m concerned about the way WWE are choosing to use Reigns though. Having him win the Rumble is one thing, putting him in lengthy singles matches on TV is another. It doesn’t play to his strengths and it’s going to do nothing to dissipate the hostility towards him. Having him blitz people inside three minutes is the way to go. Something tells me they’re not going to learn that though.

Tables, Ladders, Chairs... and Stairs 2014 review

This year's TLC had a tough time of it. Not only did it feature a bevy of matches that didn't follow logically from the previous month's supershow, it also came just three days after NXT's Takeover: R Evolution event (a review of which can be found here). That may have been presented as a lowly Network special featuring developmental talent but it was the best WWE show of the year. Comparisons between the two events are inevitable. Sadly, it was also inevitable that TLC wouldn't measure up.

Following a pre-show on which Big E and Kofi Kingston defeated The Dust Brothers the supercard (which Michael Cole described as WWE's version of a demolition derby) officially kicked off with the Intercontinental championship ladder match. Dolph Ziggler, as the hometown boy, got a massive ovation and immediate chants of "Let's go Ziggler!" at the bell. It helped Harper get some heat too.

Four time IC champ Dolph Ziggler.

The match didn't reach the heights of the famed Razor Ramon v Shawn Michaels ladder clashes or Hardys, Dudleys and Edge and Christian spot-fests but it was a great choice for the opener. They spent the opening minutes throwing ladders at each other, gradually progressing to more impressive stunts. Highlights included a Harper suicide dive (which came close to breaking Harper's arm), a Ziggler drop kick onto a ladder, a Harper power bomb onto a ladder, a ladder-assisted pendulum by Harper, a Ziggler X Factor onto a ladder (which pretty much confirms Ziggler wants a monopoly on all signature moves of former DX members), Harper busting out the Terry Funk special, and, finally, a super kick from one ladder to another by Ziggler. That last was enough to stun Harper long enough for 'The Show Off' to grab the belt for his fourth reign. Both men left bloodied and bruised. They did everything they could to give us a worthwhile match.

The Usos pulled an Owen Hart after that and carried their Slammy awards (for tag team of the year, believe it or not) with them to the ring. They lacked Owen's charm though. Miz pulled the same trick, carrying Damien Mizdow's prestigious LOL Moment of the Year Slammy. Mizdow had a toy version, natch.

As you'd expect the focus of the match was, for the most part, on the antics of Damien Mizdow. ‘The A-Lister’ effectively wrestled a handicap, freeing Mizdow up to lark about and give people what they wanted. Naturally this extended to 'The Awesome One' teasing a tag to Mizdow which he had no intention of making.

Eventually Miz decided he wanted to leave. After grabbing his titles (and his stuntman’s Slammy) Miz sacrificed Mizdow to an Uso dive and then lamped the Uso with a title belt. Yes, they went for a DQ finish and Mizdow never tagged in. This aside it was a decent enough match.

Backstage Seth Rollins recapped The Authority's removal from power and dedicated his match to them. He also mentioned Sting and said he wouldn't leave Cena be until Triple H and Stephanie were reinstated. I imagine this will turn out to be foreshadowing rather than generic heel rambling.

Quality took a dip after that. After the commentary team took a ridiculous look at the "anatomy" of ring steps we were treated to Big Show v Erick Rowan. In, yes, the first ever stairs match. It may very well be the last ever too. Basically it was a stunt match in the vein of table and ladder efforts. But with stairs. As stairs are heavier than chairs and nowhere near as flimsy as WWE’s tables there was little that could be done with them. All the lads managed to muster up was wedging them between ring ropes, stacking them up, and placing them on the announce table. They gingerly bumped into them and the audience got bored. Show won when he used the stairs to pin Rowan down to the mat.

Surprisingly it was the Rollins versus Cena tables match that that followed. Mercury and Noble accompanied Rollins to the ring, allowing their man to control the first several minutes fairly easily with copious interference. Cena, being Cena, got tired of that quickly and disposed of them with a suplex onto a guardrail and, less dramatically, an AA into the timekeeper's corner. That left just the two men officially in the match. Rollins immediately set up tables at ringside and tried to suplex Cena through them. Cena countered and suplexed him back into the ring. Rollins hit a standing Sliced Bread and tried to whip Cena through a table propped up in the corner. Predictably Cena halted that and back dropped Rollins out of the ring.

Look at the state of that briefcase.

'Mr Money in the Bank' returned with his briefcase and gave Cena a walloping with it. Cena kicked Rollins in the head as he was bent over mocking the Five Knuckle Shuffle taunt then tried to AA him through a table, accidentally taking out the referee as he did (oh no!). Rollins landed on his feet from the attempted AA, vaulted back over the table and Cena, and hit an enziguri that just happened to send Cena sprawling onto the table. Rollins headed to the top rope for a Curb Stomp but Cena caught him and AAed him through the table.

Cole announced Cena was victorious but (shock!) the ref was still slumped at ringside. Noble and Mercury returned to clean up the broken table and then gave Cena a kicking. Cena quickly escaped a Shield-esque power bomb and put the stooges through a table with a double AA. Seconds later Cena and Rollins locked up on the apron and leapt through a table at ringside. So much for tables matches being a way to give us a decisive winner without anyone doing the job, right?

Two referees showed up to argue about who'd won. Match official Mike Chioda couldn't decide on a winner so he restarted the match, rendering the entire double finish exercise pointless. Cena and Rollins began hammering at each other and spilled out to the commentary desks, where Cena AAed Rollins onto the English table. It didn't break so Cena got back into the ring to setup up yet another table.

Big Show returned to put a stop to that. Then he teased choke slamming Cena through a table. It seemed designed to rub our noses in the fact that Cena and Show would have been natural opponents for this show (see here for more on this). The choke slam didn't happen. Instead ‘The Giant’ was distracted by the music of Roman Reigns, he stormed through the crowd (to a healthy response), cracked Show with a Superman punch and speared him through a table. Rollins got a Superman punch too, then took an AA through a table to give Cena the victory.

As table matches go it wasn't bad. What it lacked in spots it made up for in interference, which is a viable way of making these sorts of things exciting. That said it didn't really do Rollins any favours. Even with The New Stooges and 'The World's Largest Athlete' watching out for him he couldn't get the win. The Reigns interference did little to offset that. He was very portrayed clearly as a man not in Cena's league.

After some pointless babble from Alex Riley and Booker T we were shown Byron Saxton interviewing the Bella twins. Nikki declared AJ was jealous of her. Brie said she was sick of people judging their relationship. Basically they're back together and we need to deal with that. No logical plot developments here. Move along.

Nikki Bella: too fabulous to sweat this match.

Nikki dominated the match. Brie was pretty much a non-factor for the most part, which was a pleasant surprise. The match was dull, with another finish designed to show us Nikki goes for the cheapest win possible: as Brie was being sent backstage (for her first real bit of interference in the match) Nikki pulled a bottle from her sock, sprayed AJ with it, and then hit the Rack Attack. 

Tom Phillips then had a chat with Roman Reigns. ‘The Empire’ stumbled over his words, then briefly forgot his words, then told us he was officially entering the Royal Rumble. If he didn't take acting lessons while he was off he should have done. If he did they didn't have any effect.

The chairs match between Kane and Ryback was boring and clumsy. 'The Big Guy' pinned Kane via Shellshock. That was followed by the United States title match. They didn't go for as long as they did in their Battleground or SummerSlam matches. This was perhaps because it was a rehash and Rusev needed to be shown to have improved since August. He won after Swaggalag passed out in The Accolade.

Then a Royal Rumble ad aired, focusing on the WWE title match that will take place between challenger John Cena and champion Brock Lesnar. Odd considering the match had been confirmed less than an hour before. It's almost like wrestling's fixed.

Dean Ambrose and Bray Wyatt had the honour of closing the show. For the second month in a row the hype video made the rivalry look far more layered, interesting and entertaining than it has been. WWE's production team earned their money with that one. Ambrose sauntered to the ring with a ladder slung over his arm, a ladder he lobbed at Wyatt as soon as the lights came on after his entrance. They brawled in the aisle, over to the announce area, and into the audience.

They finally entered the ring several minutes into the bout. Ambrose introduced kendo sticks and chairs. Not to be outdone Wyatt punched Ambrose off the top rope through a table set up at ringside, then used the kendo stick himself. In time ladders were used too. But none of it really meant anything. They were progressing through WWE's established hierarchy of weaponry to escalate the stakes but they were doing it because it was expected, not because it made sense for the story the match was telling. This is not to say the pair were going through the motions because they weren't. It's just that they didn't have a sufficient number of ideas for the gimmick and time they had.

One of many elbow drops.

The big tricks (if you can call them that) they had were saved for the final third of the bout. 'The Lunatic Fringe' twice leapt off a ladder to elbow drop Wyatt through a table. Wyatt came back with a flash Sister Abigail back in the ring. Ambrose responded with Dirty Deeds. When that failed Ambrose grabbed Jeff Hardy's Super Tall Ladder™ and propped it up near the announce desks. Wyatt, who'd had several minutes of recovery time, attacked Ambrose with a chair, only to get laid out on the good old Spanish announce desk. Which Ambrose elbow dropped him thorough, obvs.

The ending came straight from the Wacky Finish Handbook. Ambrose rolled Wyatt back into the ring and grabbed a TV monitor which was plugged in beneath the ring (it's standard practice for WWE to have televisions showing their live pay-per-view stashed below the ring according to Maggle Cole). When he ran across the ring with it to thump Wyatt it "shorted out", causing some sparks and a small amount of smoke to puff out near Ambrose's ear. 'The Eater of Worlds' got up and scored with another Sister Abigail for the win.

The match would have benefited from being ten minutes shorter. They didn't have the material to fill half an hour and they couldn't keep the fast pace needed to hold attention for that long. Credit to WWE for putting them on last though.

TLC wasn't awful but it was the worst WWE pay-per-view in a while. Opener aside nothing stood out as particularly good. But it was at least more rewarding than the average RAW, and considering the emphasis WWE place on TV over pay-per-view nowadays that should probably be chalked up as an accomplishment. Coming so soon after Takeover: R Evolution, to which it couldn't measure up, definitely didn’t help either. It makes you wonder why WWE is sticking with the approach that led them to TLC when the approach that led to R Evolution has proven far more creatively satisfying. It's time for them to get out of their rut and so something new. The NXT formula writ large is the way to go.

***

Results summary:

Dolph Ziggler defeated Luke Harper for the Intercontinental championship
The Miz and Damien Mizdow defeated The Usos
Big Show defeated Erick Rowan
John Cena defeated Seth Rollins
Nikki Bella defeated AJ Lee
Ryback defeated Kane
Rusev defeated Jack Swagger
Bray Wyatt defeated Dean Ambrose

Tables, Ladders, Chairs... and Alternate Universes

At the end of last month’s Survivor Series it looked like things had been set up for an interesting TLC pay-per-view. Looking at the card we’ve ended up with I wonder where it all went wrong. And, to be clear, something definitely has gone wrong, because tonight’s show is not what’s “best for business.” It doesn’t come close to being what’s “best for business.”

I mean, they’re doing John Cena versus Seth Rollins in a tables match, with the stipulation that Cena will lose his world title shot if Rollins wins. I’m sure it will be a decent enough match but there’s little to get excited about with it. The same goes for Harper versus Ziggler. The less said about Kane v Ryback, Big Show v Erick Rowan, and the revival of the Swagger v Rusev feud the better.

This isn’t the worst show WWE could be putting on. But it’s not the best either. I understand that they want to just keep things ticking over until doing the really important stuff at Royal Rumble but they could have done that and presented a better card. Completely disregarding continuity between pay-per-views does nothing for anyone.

Why didn't they give us this beard battle?

Harper and Rowan are the obvious guys to mention at this point. As I’ve written before, they got a promising reception when they squared off with one another at Survivor Series. It made me think that people could be convinced to emotionally invest in a singles match between them, and the exchanges they had made me think they could actually make a match work.

In addition to that both have recently been “set free” by Bray Wyatt, giving them a logical plot reason to clash: they each want to prove they can be the breakout star of that group. Like a sort of sibling rivalry thing, without them being actual siblings. Harper has become one of the go-to heels for WWE since his return. Facing a man of a similar size would have allowed him to demonstrate that he could do something other than throw Dolph Ziggler around and it would have allowed Rowan to progress by association.

It could have been for the Intercontinental title but I think that would have been a step too far. It’s not that Harper’s not a credible champion, but I think the title would be better attached to someone else on the roster. Specifically Ziggler or Rollins. With WWE champion Brock Lesnar absent from television (until he rocks up on RAW after TLC, anyway) the IC champ is the top title holder. That status, emphasised or not, could have helped to boost the standing of Ziggler or Rollins because they’re already positioned as guys close to the top. On Harper the IC title looks like a middle of the card prize. On Ziggler or Rollins it would have been given an enhancement that would have lasted once the WWE championship returned.

There have been plenty of Harper v Ziggler bouts since Survivor Series so it’s obvious WWE isn’t shy about giving us that match. They could have easily had ‘The Show Off’ regain the Intercontinental title in one of those meetings. Done in the right way it could have drawn the Harper v Ziggler series to a close, leaving Ziggler to defend his title against Seth Rollins. In fact it could have even had Rowan interfering, adding to the necessity to have a Harper v Rowan match and keeping Harper strong in defeat. Ziggler v Rollins in a ladder match is a more attractive proposition to pretty much anyone. It would have made both men and the championship mean more, and would have stood more chance of shifting some tickets for the show.

These changes would have left both John Cena and Big Show free. Which is fine, because they were set up as opponents at Survivor Series when ‘The World’s Largest Athlete’ punched Cena in the jaw. A Cena v Show match is not the most exciting thing in the world but it would at least have a reason for happening and keep Cena from harming the momentum of a Rollins or a Harper or a Ziggler. They could even have kept the tables match stipulation, which is (I think) a match they’ve never done in any of their many previous meetings.

Better than Kane v Ryback.

Although it wasn’t directly hinted at at any point a Rusev v Ryback match would have made a great deal of sense. Rusev is undefeated and unsubmitted. Since returning at the end of October ‘The Big Guy’ has been (sloppily) pushed as a dominant babyface, similar to his run in 2012. Although Rybers had suffered pinfall losses he was being presented as “back on form” and could have been built up after Survivor Series as a contender to Rusev’s US championship.

In fairness it’s unlikely that a Ryback versus Rusev match would be as good as a Swagger versus Rusev match. But it would be something new for pay-per-view and wouldn’t be such an obvious re-tread of a rivalry wrapped up just four months earlier. Ryback stood a better chance of convincing people he could defeat ‘The Super Athlete’. Swagger has shown that he can’t get the job done.

It’s also worth noting that Rusev doesn’t generally get the credit he deserves for being able to put together a good match. He’s not afraid to sell, his offence is always on target and looking good, and Ryback can, when the stars align, put on a decent showing. They may have been able to do a better match than expected, especially if they’d been afforded a shortcut-enabling chairs match stipulation.

Tag match, playa!

If creative had really wanted to push the boat out they could even have tweaked the Divas scene. Since failing to regain the championship from AJ at Hell in a Cell Paige has done nothing but work a limp series opposite sometimes-face-sometimes-heel Alicia Fox. With the Bellas reuniting (for reasons still not revealed) at Survivor Series a segment could have been set up where the sisters attacked AJ and Paige came out to even the odds. A Bella twins versus Paige and AJ Lee match would have been a far more interesting prospect than another Divas title match added to the show as a token gesture. It would have allowed for some actual story to be injected into the women’s division too, especially with if they’d stuck with AJ and Paige being uneasy allies working against common foes.

The rest of the card seems promising enough without any changes being made. Wyatt and Ambrose being in a TLC match makes sense. The New Day lads clashing with Goldust and Stardust is, if nothing else, a desperately needed fresh match. With a spot free on the main show that match could have been bumped up from the pre-show. The tag title match has had more storyline progression than anything else on the show thanks to the involvement of Naomi. It’s the most admirable thing WWE have done over the last three weeks.

I don’t think this proposed card (summarised below for simplicity and ease) would have been the absolute best thing ever. Nor do I think it would have been the best possible Tables, Ladders, Chairs… and Stairs show possible. But I do think it would have offered more than what WWE have cooked up.

***

Proposed card summary:

Bray Wyatt v Dean Ambrose in a TLC match
Dolph Ziggler v Seth Rollins in a ladder match for the Intercontinental championship
Erick Rowan v Luke Harper
John Cena v Big Show in a tables match
Rusev v Ryback for the United States championship
The Bella twins v Paige and AJ Lee
Damien Mizdow and The Miz v The Usos for the tag team championship
The New Day v Goldust and Stardust