Saturday 11 February 2012

SmackTalk 10.02.12

This week’s SmackDown was not as good as previous weeks. The only thing it’s likely to be remembered for is the first confrontation between Randy Orton and Daniel Bryan. That was a very good match, especially by WWE TV standards.

It’s a shame that it wasn’t saved for a pay-per-view event, but giving away first time matches on RAW and SmackDown seems fairly common in WWE these days so it’s not surprising. Perhaps the feeling was that as Bryan and Orton are both going to be in SmackDown’s Elimination Chamber match next weekend their first singles meeting needed to happen beforehand. I also think this was the original WrestleMania World title match and that plans have changed, so the feeling now is that the match doesn’t need to be saved. 

The rest of the (active) SmackDown main event crew were involved in a tag match: Wade Barrett and Cody Rhodes v Big Show and Sheamus. As you’ll read below I have a feeling that the idea of a Barrett v Sheamus feud is being introduced to fans now so that it can happen properly once ‘Mania’s out of the way. I wouldn’t be surprised if the World Heavyweight championship was involved and it led to a run at the top for the Englishman.

The tag match itself was enjoyable for what it was but nothing special. With three of the four men involved being people that WWE are relying on to become big stars in the future that’s not really good enough. The booking should be excellent at this time of the year but it feels like WWE’s treading water with regards to elevating stars. Let Cody defend the Intercontinental title. Let Barrett dispose of mid-card talent (and build some mid-card talent while you’re at it). Let Sheamus cut more promos so that he can become as likeable as he needs to be to gain acceptance as a challenger at WrestleMania. None of these things are happening and they should be.

The star of the show was Daniel Bryan. He was not only part of the great main event but he also cut a very effective heel promo in the middle of the show. His new character direction is working nicely. He was already a highlight of SmackDown for his matches but now he’s enjoyable for his character too.

Speaking of highlights: I not only miss Christian (which is understandable: he’s an excellent addition to the roster and makes every show he’s on better) but I found myself missing Mark Henry this week too. He can’t wrestle but he’s a genuinely intimidating man and works very well when used sparingly. He is a good character, and I was enjoying the vague hint that a face turn was in the works for him.

Both men ought to be back in time for WrestleMania XXVIII.

As far as the show’s mid-card goes: Jinder Mahal putting his headwear into a box was priceless. It’s one of those strange things you get in wrestling from time to time that don’t make any sense and are all the more enjoyable for it. Ted Dibiase needs a character. Desperately. He should either be turned heel again or be taken in a radical new direction as a babyface. The trouble at the moment is that people have no reason to care about him: he’s just a generic, hand-slapping smiley mid-carder. He doesn’t have the charisma to pull that off and the whole Dibiase Posse thing isn’t catching on.

Anyway, here are the tweets:

Opening promo, featuring Sheamus, Wade Barrett, Cody Rhodes and Big Show

Tweet 1: It’s SmackDown time.
Tweet 2: Seeing Christian on the opening makes me wish he was back already. SmackDown is a poorer show without him.
Tweet 3: Sheamus opens the show. I bet he's just going to witter on about having not made up his mind about who he'll wrestle at 'Mania again.
Tweet 4: #fella
Tweet 5: History has told Sheamus that one world title WILL change hands at EC. Is he giving away booking plans there? That'd be a great gimmick.
Tweet 6: Sheamus stood his ground when people told him to get a tan and drop the accent. He wanted to make it to the top on his own merits.
Tweet 7: ... Oh and he started working out with Triple H too. That's pure coincidence though.
Tweet 8: Wade Barrett. With his (awful) new entrance music.
Tweet 9: Barrett has activated Camp Mode.
Tweet 10: Cody has made a jig at the entrance part of his regular routine. I like it. It's ridiculous enough to work.
Tweet 11: Big Show walks out. Fat people in the audience are shown. This has become a weekly occurrence. Is it smart editing or a rib on fans?
Tweet 12: Big Show v Sheamus for the World Heavyweight championship is indeed a match, Show. We can't argue with that.
Tweet 13: “Horrowing”? Oh, Cole…
Tweet 14: Ah good, there's the Great Khali. I'd like to take this opportunity to point out that he can't even walk convincingly.
Tweet 15: That opening segment was fifteen minutes long and did nothing except set up a tag match. Everything that was said we've heard before. Poor.

Jinder Mahal v The Great Khali

Tweet 16: Jinder Mahal is putting a HAT in a Perspex BOX. This is compelling television.
Tweet 17: Look at Khali. Actually look at the state of him. This is awful. Why is this happening? Why is this being allowed to happen?
Tweet 18: Rag-tag. #Bookerism
Tweet 19: What I liked most about that match was Khali keeping the cover going for a second or two after he'd won.
Tweet 20: Watch Booker T's hands when he's speaking. He has main event level hands.

Teddy Long and Daniel Bryan backstage segment

Tweet 21: Daniel Bryan is working wonders. He can even carry Teddy Long to an enjoyable backstage segment.
Tweet 22: I don't really know why that segment happened. It was just Bryan talking about being a vegan. Fun as it was it wasn't new.
Tweet 23: WHAT HAPPENED TO JINDER'S HAT?!

Beth Phoenix v Alicia Fox, The Rock hype video, and Natalya

Tweet 24: Beth Phoenix has good entrance music. Sadly she has no worthwhile opponents.
Tweet 25: I'd like a backstage segment in which Daniel Bryan lays into Alicia Fox for wearing that fur to the ring.
Tweet 26: Beth Phoenix won?! Didn't see that coming (I did).
Tweet 27: Tamina. Booker just called her 'The Warrior Princess'. I hope that name sticks.
Tweet 28: Randy Orton is standing backstage staring into a camera as he stretches. For the second week in a row. Solid stuff.
Tweet 29: Rock hype video. These things are going to get very tiresome in the next six weeks.
Tweet 30: Rock realised, at fourteen, that he could change his life with his hands. No comment.
Tweet 31: Natalya and Tyson Kidd backstage. Here comes a fart gag...

Big Show and Sheamus v Cody Rhodes and Wade Barrett

Tweet 32: Big Show shakes hands with Charles Robinson. I wonder why. Nobody else cares.
Tweet 33: BARRETT RING COAT ALERT!!
Tweet 34: I have a feeling Sheamus will get the World title in the next couple of months and then feud with Barrett. That feud has potential.
Tweet 35: He won't necessarily win the belt at WrestleMania. I think he'll have it by the May PPV, whatever it's called.
Tweet 36: Closed fists are illegal in wrestling so really Big Show should be disqualified every time he uses that KTFO punch.
Tweet 37: Who is Sheamus going to wrestle at Elimination Chamber? As the Rumble winner he ought to be facing someone.
Tweet 38: They just mentioned Barrett's fictitious bare knuckle background. They do it every week. I should be used to it. I'm not.
Tweet 39: Note to WWE: it is very clear that Barrett does not weigh 270 pounds. Please don't have Michael Cole claim that's what he weighs.
Tweet 40: Big Show did a hunching clothesline and Josh Mathews called it as a spear. I feel cold inside.
Tweet 41: The faces win. Another utterly unsurprising result.

Michael Cole interviews AJ, featuring comments from Daniel Bryan

Tweet 42: Up next: YET ANOTHER replay of the AJ Death Bump.
Tweet 43: AJ looks very happy and is walking very briskly for someone in a neck brace.
Tweet 44: "Big oaf." Michael Cole is a journalist. Never forget that. NEVER.
Tweet 45: So AJ is telling off Michael Cole. Tremendous. We're back to Cole being a featured performer again.
Tweet 46: How about this: bring JR back to the announce desk and use Cole as a heel manager. He'd work well in the role and JR's a better commentator.
Tweet 47: Did Cole just call Show a moving bus?
Tweet 48: AJ has no self-respect. Someone told Michael Cole that at breakfast.
Tweet 49: Daniel Bryan is bringing this episode of SmackDown back from the brink of mind-numbing tedium.
Tweet 50: Bryan took a nature walk during the Super Bowl. Comments like that are why he's so good.
Tweet 51: Daniel Bryan recycles. Daniel Bryan is the World Heavyweight champion. I think the moral of the story is plain for all to see.
Tweet 52: Cole, a heel, is pseudo-feuding with Daniel Bryan, also a heel. That's the magic of Vince McMahon's mind.
Tweet 53: "Personal day." I LOL'd.

Daniel Bryan was the best thing about this week's SmackDown. Give the guy a personal day!

Ted Dibiase v Hunico

Tweet 54: Ted Dibiase. If anyone wants to check another channel now's the time.
Tweet 55: Hunico on a bike!!
Tweet 56: Ted Dibiase just bungled a clothesline. I don't know how. I certainly don't know why. I do know it will prove to be the match's highlight.
Tweet 57: Ted Dibiase would be the perfect guy to be given an experimental gimmick of some sort. He's not over so try stuff with him.
Tweet 58: I care far more about Hunico's bike than I do about this match or the feud between Dibiase and Hunico.
Tweet 59: Ted gets a rollup victory. Great. As a reward give him two or three weeks off and give Brodus Clay the air time instead.

From the Vault

Tweet 60: Cryme Time v JeriShow. I have mixed feelings about this... #FromtheVault
Tweet 61: Striker just referred to Cryme Time as the Sugar Hill Gang. Strikes me as a bit racist but that's Striker for you.
Tweet 62: Nobody has ever stood up from a Big Show punch. He is a killer. Credit this information to Todd Grisham.

The announcement that John Laurinaitis has kept his job

Tweet 63: John Laurinaitis has retained his job as interim RAW GM. Phew.
Tweet 64: Laurinaitis "live" on the phone from Abu Dhabi is amusing on multiple levels.
Tweet 65: #MrExcitement

Randy Orton v Daniel Bryan

Tweet 66: SmackDown's serving up an Ortonburger right NOW.
Tweet 67: Big Show is on commentary. He's no Booker T.
Tweet 68: Bryan's got a lot of black on his trunks. Don't worry though: the maroon's still there. #Regalstudent
Tweet 69: Running knee from the apron. #ROH
Tweet 70: Bryan v Orton is very good for a WWE TV match. Their first singles bout should've been saved for a pay-per-view though.
Tweet 71: Flying headbutt. #Benoit
Tweet 72: Everybody loves a superplex. That's what 'Cowboy' Bob told Randy at any rate...
Tweet 73: Why are WWE booking Cole to lay into Show for facing non-wrestlers at 'Mania when they're planning to do it AGAIN this year?
Tweet 74: “Are you going to sit here and run?" - Big Show
Tweet 75: Big Show chucks an attempting-to-flee Daniel Bryan into the ring and Orton RKOs him. Bryan wins by DQ.
Tweet 76: SmackDown goes off the air with Bryan smirking as he watches Show and Orton lump each other. The champ was the star of the episode.

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