Saturday 4 February 2012

SmackTalk 03.02.12

For the second week in a row I present my tweets from this week’s broadcast of SmackDown. They should give you a rough idea of what happened on the show but this is not intended as a thorough recap. Let’s go!

Opening segment, featuring Teddy Long, Mark Henry, Cody Rhodes and Sheamus

Tweet 1: It’s SmackDown time.
Tweet 2: Randy Orton is "venomous." Wade Barrett is "calculating." That is the story of SmackDown's first minute.
Tweet 3: Teddy Long! AND HE'S DANCING.
Tweet 4: #player
Tweet 5: Teddy has officially confirmed that SmackDown will participate in the Elimination Chamber PPV. I was worried they'd sit it out.
Tweet 6: This Chamber match doesn't look as good as RAW's but it still looks good.
Tweet 7: Show, Barrett, Cody, Henry, and Orton challenging Bryan.
Tweet 8: I know Henry's getting taken out. Nobody could have avoided that spoiler. Ah, speaking of #Shark Henry...
Tweet 9: Booker was impressed by Henry walking to the ring apparently.
Tweet 10: "I'm the most dominant talent on this program. I'm the big fish" - Mark Henry, who can't possibly really believe that.
Tweet 11: I am amazed that Henry is being accepted as a tweener for the second week in a row. The crowd are booing him not getting a title match!
Tweet 12: Hashtag Sheamus save.
Tweet 13: Henry takes a kick to the face well. In fairness I imagine it's difficult to NOT sell getting kicked in the face.
Tweet 14: Sheamus promo. #fella
Tweet 15: Cody needs some new trunks. Change it up, buddy. Go for electric blue. Maybe yellow.
Tweet 16: Cody eliminated six guys in the Rumble. The commentary team should have pushed that in the match. They're never prepared.
Tweet 17: Sheamus v Cody Rhodes. More exciting matches are available.
Tweet 18: This Elimination Chamber video starring Shemus features bagpipes. Why?

 Cody Rhodes v Sheamus

Tweet 19: Sheamus will announce who he's challenging at WrestleMania after the Chamber event. I imagine it'll be the SmackDown Chamber winner.
Tweet 20: Disaster kick outside the ring. Nice spot.
Tweet 21: Rhodes does a tasty moonsault.
Tweet 22: "Tremendous impact" - Josh Mathews
Tweet 23: How many times per broadcast does Booker say "Here we go!"?
Tweet 24: Booker has never seen Sheamus's new finisher before? Maybe watch a Finlay match from five years ago, Book. You'll see it there.
Tweet 25: Sheamus wins. Cody never stood a chance against the guy getting the Rumble Winner Push™.

Justin Gabriel v Hunico (which doesn’t because Hunico cuts a promo and then joins Cody Rhodes in doffing up Gabriel)

Tweet 26: Justin Gabriel is accompanied to ringside by his hair. Cody is still at ringside.
Tweet 27: Hunico on a bike!!
Tweet 28: Hunico with a mic!!
Tweet 29: #Hispanicheelbeatdown
Tweet 30: Khali? #facepalm
Tweet 31: Why is Khali back? Why? WHY?

Announcement that Cole will interview Daniel Bryan and various backstage shenanigans

Tweet 32: Cole interviewing Bryan later in the show. I suspect that will lead to Cole's official on-screen acceptance of the champ.
Tweet 33: Bryan's a heel. Cole is the pro-heel announcer. They need to do an angle that will allow Cole to openly support Bryan. Straightforward.
Tweet 34: Drew McIntyre thinks he could be the biggest superstar of all time. He is wrong.
Tweet 35: Teddy wants Drew to impress him. Sounds a bit weird to be honest.
Tweet 36: Who's being wasted in a team with Santino this week? Ah, Jim Duggan. That's not a waste of talent, just a waste of a spot.
Tweet 37: The lighting effect and saxophone that signal Aksana's arrival: does that indicate that she has Undertaker- and Kane-style powers?
Tweet 38: Maybe she's Sin Cara's sister...

Hall of Fame induction video

Tweet 39: They probably planned to induct anyone who'd ever been a Horseman but then realised that that would include Benoit. He's never going in.
Tweet 40: Tyson in HOF video. Again.
Tweet 41: Getting punched in the face by Tyson was Michaels' final bump for four and a half years. I've only just realised that.
Tweet 42: Watch that clip: Michaels takes that punch really well.

Jim Duggan and Santino v Epico and Primo

Tweet 43: Santino and Jim Duggan v Epico and Primo. I'm going to find it hard to care about this match.
Tweet 44: "That's what you're going to look like, Booker, in about a year!" - Michael Cole on Jim Duggan. I laughed.
Tweet 45: The most over person involved in this match is Rosa Mendes. Doesn't say much for WWE's talent building, does it?
Tweet 46: Shucky ducky quack quack!! #Bookerism
Tweet 47: I'm bored of the Cobra.
Tweet 48: Pretty bored of this match too.
Tweet 49: Primo and Epico win. I'm not surprised.
Tweet 50: Dont. Do it. Like that. Baby. #Bookerism

Daniel Bryan promo

Tweet 51: Shhhhhhh. Cole wants our attention.
Tweet 52: Look how happy Bryan is. It's nice to see such a positive wrestler.
Tweet 53: "This is about me," said Daniel Bryan, officially becoming a heel.
Tweet 54: They've changed the font on the title belt's name plate again. Things like that annoy me.
Tweet 55: Daniel Bryan's role model gimmick is good for heat. He does it very nicely.
Tweet 56: It's a variant on Punk's bad guy character. Veganism replaces straight edge.
Tweet 57: Vegans are heat magnets. That's fact. That's science.
Tweet 58: Bryan doesn't want to go into the Chamber. That's how I'd have booked it.
Tweet 59: Reference to the WWE Board of Directors. Not heard of them for a while.
Tweet 60: Big Show stumbles out. Fat men the world over rejoice at the sight of him.
Tweet 61: Big Show mentions eating a steak and gets a pop. See? Fat guys love him!
Tweet 62: Why does everyone keep bringing up maths regarding the Chamber?
Tweet 63: Daniel Bryan is right: Big Show WON'T win the title at Elimination Chamber. Want to know why? Because Sheamus v Show would be awful.
Tweet 64: AJ sighting.
Tweet 65: She's wearing a neck brace. Nobody pulls off a neck brace like Joel Gertner.
Tweet 66: The facial expression from Bryan as he hugged AJ was brilliant! One of the best heel looks I've seen in WWE for ages.

Natalya and Beth Phoenix v Aksana and Tamina

Tweet 67: This wind gimmick of Natalya's is going to get very annoying very quickly.
Tweet 68: Aksana and Tamina against Beth and Natalya. At least one team is good.
Tweet 69: "Get outta my ring, Natty" - Beth Phoenix to Natalya
Tweet 70: Maybe they're going to do Natalya v Beth for 'Mania. That's the best women's match they could do.
Tweet 71: I predict there will be some sort of altercation between Beth and Natalya at Elimination Chamber.

Beth Phoenix and Natalya. Are the Sisters of Destruction going to end up as opponents at WrestleMania XXVIII?

Randy Orton backstage and From the Vault

Tweet 72: Orton stretching backstage. In front of a camera. What a show off.
Tweet 73: From the Vault: Undertaker v Chris Jericho. One of the better uses of the segment.
Tweet 74: Jericho just hit a hilariously poor drop kick. The irony is that he used to team with Lance Storm.
Tweet 75: Matt Striker is an awful commentator. He is somehow making this match less enjoyable just by talking.
Tweet 76: The Codebreaker is one of my favourite finishers in wrestling, because it can be used surprisingly and on an opponent of any size.
Tweet 77: 'The Dark Terminator'? 'The Minister of the Night'? What has Striker been smoking?
Tweet 78: Matt Striker backstage. What have we done to deserve this?
Tweet 79: Orton's beard is back again. I am peeved.
Tweet 80: Orton just admitted he would've tried to kill Barrett had their roles been reversed. They're as bad as each other.

Wade Barrett v Randy Orton

Tweet 82: This new entrance music is DIRE. This opinion isn't helped by the fact that I loved Barrett's old music.
Tweet 83: Barrett threw Orton down stairs "two months" ago? No. It was about five weeks ago.
Tweet 84: Random backstage shot of Bryan, AJ and Teddy. No idea why.
Tweet 85: Josh says Orton spent "nearly a month" on the injured list because of that stair incident. I thought it was two months? Make your minds up!
Tweet 86: Booker just nonsensically yammering away about the British Bulldog there.
Tweet 87: Orton just high fived a child. He is channelling John Cena.
Tweet 88: Stomping a man's head onto metal steps is not earn censorship from Sky Sports. #goodtimes
Tweet 89: Tables are the height of hardcore insanity in today's WWE.
Tweet 90: Barrett has the second best hair in WWE. The best? Dolph Ziggler, obvs. #heelsdoitbetter
Tweet 91: Did Cole just say that Barrett was brought up bare knuckled fighting in order to "pay for his meals"? Where does he get this stuff?
Tweet 92: Orton is being very athletic here. Barrett's selling well. The audience are into it. Good main event.
Tweet 93: The annihilation of an innocent chair. A woman in the audience weeps at the carnage.
Tweet 94: It's back to being called Wasteland it it? I thought it had been renamed the Barrett Barrage?
Tweet 95: Whoever wins, the chair loses.
Tweet 96: Barrett's side slam is a nice move. It needs an amusing name though.
Tweet 97: They teased a table spot. Perhaps it will get obliterated in a post-match scuffle.
Tweet 98: The snake wins. Not surprising. Good match though.
Tweet 99: Bryan v Orton next week: that's a good move. Solid match announced a week in advance. Should encourage people to watch.
Tweet 100: Orton v Bryan deserves to be SmackDown's lead feud.
Tweet 101: And that concludes my tweeting of SmackDown.

That was one a good episode of SmackDown. With the exception of Khali all the Elimination Chamber entrants are good picks. Although that said I didn’t hear the announcement that Khali has replaced Mark Henry in the match. Perhaps I wasn’t paying attention or perhaps it was edited out by WWE and they’re planning someone else to replace ‘The World’s Strongest Man’. We’ll work on the assumption that I wasn’t listening for now.

The Chamber matches have done their job of getting me excited for that pay-per-view. The last several years have seen some pretty random choices thrown into the cage bouts at the show and I’m pleased that this year the line-ups feature so many talented guys who deserve chances to main event shows.

I’m expecting Justin Gabriel to be the man who dethrones Cody Rhodes for the Intercontinental title. A feud is gradually being built up between the two. I’m not a huge fan of Gabriel but he could be a decent mid-card guy if given a chance. There are worse people WWE could put the Intercontinental gold on. I still think Brodus Clay should beat Cody though.

Finally, Daniel Bryan was definitely the star of the show. He entered another strong performance and once again proved that he works very well in the heel role. His character is very similar to Punk’s right now, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. It’s just not what I was expecting. I’ll only complain if he starts up a Vegan Society and starts using lower card guys as henchmen.

With Orton v Bryan announced for next week’s show it looks like SmackDown will put on another good show. That’s standard: it’s the most consistent show in wrestling.

No comments:

Post a Comment