A Kind of Magic

A couple of weeks ago I was driven down to Bournemouth for a day trip (yeah, driven: I travel in style). During the journey Steff (the girl doing the driving) insisted on listening to a Best of Queen collection. I’m not really one for music (although I did go through a phase of buying WWE’s entrance theme compilations) but the dulcet tones of Freddie Mercury (no relation to Joey) gave me an idea for a wrestling gimmick.

Well, it sort of gave me an idea. Truth be told most things have already been done in wrestling, especially gimmick-wise. The idea I had is more of a conglomeration of previously established gimmicks and ideas.

The first step for the idea is to find an unknown indy wrestler (or a debuting wrestler in a big organisation that’s willing to pay for use of music rights). Said wrestler should have a good grasp of showmanship and be willing to dance and interact with the crowd. The actual amount of wrestling skill required is minimal, at least at first.

Once selected the grappler should be kitted out in a distinctive outfit, preferably with a cape. It would need to make the grappler stand out but not become the focal point of their act. From there a list of low- and mid-card grapplers who could be used to beat a newcomer decisively should be drawn up (which shouldn’t be too taxing).

 

How has this never inspired a wrestling gimmick?

 

The gimmick would see The Newcomer enter to a different Queen track every week, singing and dancing their way to the ring and attempting to get the crowd excited. Sounds like a heel gimmick, yes? I think if the right man were found, with enough infectious charisma to perform the gimmick in a genuinely fun and playful manner, it could actually create a huge babyface star. Why Queen? Because they have a wide selection of well-known, uplifting songs that would put audiences in a good mood and encourage them to cheer the wrestler in question.

The music wouldn’t stop when they got to the ring, it would continue in its entirety. Think of the Sandman’s entrances in ECW but more camp. Perhaps more in line with Bryan Danielson’s use of The Final Countdown when he wrestled in Ring of Honor. This hypothetical act’s popularity (if it got any) would stem from the entrance.

Once the music stopped playing both competitors would receive their ring introductions.  The Newcomer would milk this too, leaping up onto the turnbuckle and giving the tried and tested Babyface Raises Their Arms into the Air™ pose.

The match would start and the newcomer would lose to the very first move their opponent gave them. It wouldn’t matter what it was: it could be a chop, a suplex, a punch, or a small package. They would lose every single one of their matches on the first move.

I think this would encourage audiences to root for The Newcomer as an underdog. After six months or so it could lead to the grappler surviving or dodging a move and maybe lasting a minute long squash match (though obviously still losing). A month or so after that they could maybe get a fluke victory.

As I said above this idea borrows from various sources. There are elements of Mikey Whipwreck, the Sandman, Brodus Clay and the Fabulous Freebirds mixed in, but it’s not a direct copy of any one of them. With the right wrestler I think this idea could prove successful. Any company that wants to use it is welcome to. Just license the rights to the Queen songs first, eh?